What's the best way to kill...?

T & P · Dec 30, 2005

Firky said:
It has had a shit. It has had a piss. It has been fed. It has been watered. But its still content to run around the house for the past hour meowing at me.

MEOW
MEOW

It must be horny then.

Firky · Dec 30, 2005

tribal_princess said:
http://www.ooze.com/ooze13/cats.html << how to cook a cat, beware graphic pictures and a nasty lookin website

Haha I've had that bookmarked for ages.

I think it is in Spain or France it is traditional to give someone a rabbit with the head still on, so they know it is not a cat

Firky · Dec 30, 2005

stella_cat said:
oh fuck off. it's still tasteless. that is all.

You should kill the cat at least a week in advance of eating it for more gamey flavour :rolleyes:

Firky · Dec 30, 2005

TeeJay said:
Killing stuff is teh funnie!!!!1111!111!oneone

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Firky is teh funnie
#
#/////

I love it when people make themselves appear more of a twat than myself.

TeeJay · Dec 30, 2005

So you must have a fairly miserable life then?

Firky · Dec 30, 2005

But it always pales in comparison to some

Sesquipedalian · Dec 30, 2005

tribal_princess said:
fuck yourself up the arsehole with a fucking spanner. cunt.

Your a very nasty fucked up little TWAT.

Yossarian · Dec 30, 2005

You're not exactly coming across as pleasant and well-balanced yourself here, Squip...

Sesquipedalian · Dec 30, 2005

Yossarian said:
You're not exactly coming across as pleasant and well-balanced yourself here, Squip...

Yes i agree,i can be just as nasty as anyone else on here.

pengaleng · Dec 31, 2005

Sesquipedalian said:
Your a very nasty fucked up little TWAT.

you started throwing the insults cunt. if you cant take it dont fucking start on me.

Funky_monks · Dec 31, 2005

I think that the problem is that cats are not supposed to live indoors. Ever. They just get full of themselves.

If you have a cat, for pity's sake, keep it outside.

Bob_the_lost · Dec 31, 2005

Shave a ring around the cat's neck, then get a tight (but not constricting) rubber seal around it, then attach it to a glass bowl with a tube coming out of the top of it (in effect fashion a cat diving suit). Then place the cat inside a large tank of formaldyhyde and put a lid on it.

Suspend it over trafalgar square and see if it can outlast david blane. OR sell it to the tate modern.

Bob_the_lost · Dec 31, 2005

Start to feed it a tiny dose of aresenic every day, build up the levels you give it over time. The cat will not only become resistant to arsenic poisoning it will also become dependant on it. ( I think, i've never tried this on a cat ). Then withdraw the supply and watch the cat die as it tries to go cold turkey.

A similar effect could be gained with any other addictive substance, but if you use crack then the next thing you'll know the local squirrels will have taken over your living room.

Larry O'Hara · Dec 31, 2005

My cat has just shown me a map of where the CLF attack cells are located--I am trying to convince her this is all a joke, but she is busily cleaning her AK47 miaowing martial tunes now. If I were a cat-killer, I'd be very afraid...

Bob_the_lost · Dec 31, 2005

Ah, i've concocted another far more cruel and devious method, but you'll need an electronically controlled valve, a small microprocessor and microphone, a powersupply and a full surgical team and some plastic tubing to pull it off.

Larry O'Hara · Dec 31, 2005

Bob_the_lost said:
Start to feed it a tiny dose of aresenic every day, build up the levels you give it over time. The cat will not only become resistant to arsenic poisoning it will also become dependant on it. ( I think, i've never tried this on a cat ). Then withdraw the supply and watch the cat die as it tries to go cold turkey.

intriguing--but just to be sure, try this method on yourself first (or have you already?).

Dhimmi · Dec 31, 2005

Firky said:
What's the best way to kill my cat? It is pissing me off. Meowfuckingoff

Get it to read u75. F&MD started here too.

Bob_the_lost · Dec 31, 2005

Larry O'Hara said:
intriguing--but just to be sure, try this method on yourself first (or have you already?).

I'd tell you, but then they would know i'm imune and use a different poision.

Larry O'Hara · Dec 31, 2005

Bob_the_lost said:
I'd tell you, but then they would know i'm imune and use a different poision.

actually, you needn't tell me--just follow the experiment through to a logical conclusion...

Johnny Canuck3 · Dec 31, 2005

Sesquipedalian said:
Feed the cat ANY ONE of your tedious,self serving threads........
Better still,leave the poor cat alone.....
Take a walk in the park......
Have a word with yourself..........
Find a suitable tree.......('cos life is not what you thought it would be.)

It is time for you to stop all of your sobbing
Yes it’s time for you to stop all of your sobbing oh oh oh
There’s one thing you gotta do
To make me still want you
Gotta stop sobbing now
Yeah yeah stop it stop it

It is time for you to laugh instead of crying
Yes it’s time for you to laugh so keep on trying oh oh oh
There’s one thing you gotta do
To make me still want you
Gotta stop sobbing now
Yeah yeah stop it stop it

Each little tear that falls from your eyes
Makes, makes me want
To take you in my arms and tell you
To stop all your sobbing

There’s one thing you gotta do
To make me still want you
And there’s one thing you gotta know
To make me want you so
Gotta stop sobbing now
Yeah yeah stop it stop it

Johnny Canuck3 · Dec 31, 2005

spring-peeper said:
nah - they bounce

Ya gotta run the car OVER it.

And - once again, use the duct tape to fix it to the pavement. One quick rev of the engine, pop the handbrake and wait for a gentle thud under the tyre.

They dont' always bounce...

Johnny Canuck3 · Dec 31, 2005

In my research, I've come across a shocking revelation about those toy dog robots from Japan:

http://www.3niswongers.com/bart/motion/robots/

Sesquipedalian · Dec 31, 2005

tribal_princess said:
you started throwing the insults cunt. if you cant take it dont fucking start on me.

You sound like a child......
"you fucking started it....."

GROW UP AND FUCK OFF

pengaleng · Dec 31, 2005

Sesquipedalian said:
You sound like a child......
"you fucking started it....."

GROW UP AND FUCK OFF

fuck you. prick.

Sesquipedalian · Dec 31, 2005

tribal_princess said:
fuck you prick.

i'll let you have the last word..........(you need it)

pengaleng · Dec 31, 2005

newbies

holteman · Dec 31, 2005

£10 on teeps in the 3rd round

Firky · Dec 31, 2005

Sesquipedalian said:
Your a very nasty fucked up little TWAT.

there's something too familiar with you...

Firky · Dec 31, 2005

Bob_the_lost said:
Shave a ring around the cat's neck, then get a tight (but not constricting) rubber seal around it, then attach it to a glass bowl with a tube coming out of the top of it (in effect fashion a cat diving suit). Then place the cat inside a large tank of formaldyhyde and put a lid on it.

Suspend it over trafalgar square and see if it can outlast david blane. OR sell it to the tate modern.

Quite like this one... you're onto a winner

Firky · Dec 31, 2005

Johnny Canuck2 said:
In my research, I've come across a shocking revelation about those toy dog robots from Japan:

http://www.3niswongers.com/bart/motion/robots/

"the death rays from the dog's eyes soon destroy the cat"

Wicked. I've got to get one of those mutts :cool:

What's the best way to kill...?

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