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What to buy my Mother

Discussion in 'Christmas and Year Review 2009' started by madzone, Dec 18, 2009.

  1. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    She's the world's worst person to buy anything for. Every birthday and christmas I have to listen to days and days of her slagging off whatever my stepbrothers have bought her. They're not the best thought out presents tbf but even if they were she'd hate them. Last year I was lucky enough to be at a christmas market with her where she found a necklace she liked but this year I haven't got a fucking clue. I've got my stepdad a bottle of port and I said to my mum that she might just have to make do with her christmas dinner. 'Oh', she said, 'Oh, well I don't look for presents like that.' It was said in very Hyacinth Bucket way so she clearly does :D

    I thought about getting her one of those digital photo frames but I have a feeling that's what my stepbrother and his wife got her and was what she was slagging off (I switch off when she starts)

    So, I don't know. Any ideas? She doesn't bath, only shower, she doesn't have any hobbies, she's not a choclolates kinda person.......

    What the fuck can I get her for about £20 ish?
  2. ajdown

    ajdown Posting in this thread

    I bought my mother a penis shaped corkscrew from Ann Summers, and of course a bottle to open with it. Oh, and various chocolates and stuff from the pound shop.
  3. Geri

    Geri wasn't born to follow

    I bought mine a scarf and some gloves from Debenhams. It was easy because she was with me and pointed them out!
  4. quimcunx

    quimcunx Too tall.

    Hyacinths in a bucket or just houseplants from M&S.
  5. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    Both have been bought by my stepbrothers in the past and met with a wail of, 'Oh for god's sake!! Not more plants/gloves/ scarves :rolleyes:'

  6. quimcunx

    quimcunx Too tall.

    get her a crown.
  7. quimcunx

    quimcunx Too tall.

    or a tiara.
  8. cesare

    cesare don't mourn, organise!

    Does she like ornaments? Paperweight/vase

    Handbag sized diary and pen

    Photoframe with pic of you and kids in
  9. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    I gave her a photo of the granbabby for her birthday. Ornaments get the same response as the plants and scarves...

    She doesn't seem to get the fact that people really struggle to find anything she'll like because she's so fucking difficult. She found a vile lavender old ladies cardi in M&S last week but it was £35. Maybe I could get her a voucher to go towards it. That'll probably be wrong as well :rolleyes:
  10. cesare

    cesare don't mourn, organise!

  11. May Kasahara

    May Kasahara the kindness kind

    She sounds a bit like my stepmum in the hard-to-buy-for stakes (stepmum is allergic/sensitive to everything, so no smellies; overweight and sensitive about it, so no clothes; plagued with real and imagined health issues, so nothing that requires activity; a martyr to the housework, and has no hobbies :rolleyes:). The best thing I did in terms of reducing present-related stress was to stop giving a shit whether she likes what I buy. This year she's getting a rather natty red handbag from Debenhams that cost £22 (not real leather, obviously). She might like it, she might not, but it's a nice enough present that I feel I've done my duty.
  12. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    She had a jigsaw phase about 4 years ago. Maybe I'll buy her a subscription to some telly magazines as all she does is sit in front of the fucking tv. She does my head in.
  13. cesare

    cesare don't mourn, organise!

    It's a bit rude to moan about presents though innit. Especially when people have made the effort.
  14. cesare

    cesare don't mourn, organise!

    Oh! How about some nice treat type foodz in a little hamper?
  15. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    Totally. She's not just rude about what my stepbrother buys her, she's vicious.
  16. May Kasahara

    May Kasahara the kindness kind

    If she's that much of a cunt about it, wrap up a potato in loads of layers of paper so it looks like a big exciting present :D
  17. weepiper

    weepiper Jock under the bed

    God I'd be so tempted to wrap her up an empty box and when she gets outraged explain that 'nothing is good enough' :D
  18. krtek a houby

    krtek a houby it can't happen here

  19. Griff

    Griff Hardly posting anymore

    I'm getting my mum one of those digtal camera picture frames. :)

    Just re-read your OP, and they could be the gift of the year for people. :D
  20. marty21

    marty21 One on one? You're crazy.

    I thought the thread title was "want to buy my mother"
  21. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    She used to do that to me as a kid. One of my presents would be a cold jacket potato, all wrapped up. Do you think she might be slightly 'damaged'? :D
  22. kabbes

    kabbes "A top 400 poster"

    £20 will buy you a DS game. I suggest "Professor Layton and the Curious Village", which old people tend to like.

    Then you can spend the next 5 years building up the pot to buy her the DS to play it on.
  23. bridgy45

    bridgy45 deliverance country

    What about a voucher for something like a head massage or a foot massage at a local beauty shop ?
  24. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    She wouldn't let anyone touch her :D I suggested that as a present several years ago and got all kinds of shudders and 'Urgh, don't fancy that'

    My stepdaughters got me that as a present years ago - I fucking loved it.
  25. 5t3IIa

    5t3IIa Registered User

  26. Voley

    Voley The Prebendary Of Wetwang

    Voucher's the best bet here, I'm afraid. M&S or summat. If she rolls her eyes, tell her why.
  27. sheothebudworths

    sheothebudworths Up the bum - no babies!!!

    My mum has asked for a wooden spoon and some hairbands. :D

    I'm going to spoil her though and get her a silicon spatula to go with the wooden spoon - she'll be well amazed at that little invention. :cool:
  28. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    Her reading extends no further than her Woman's Weekly :(
  29. madzone

    madzone Physically unfavourable

    It's not me being shit and unimaginative then? :D
  30. 5t3IIa

    5t3IIa Registered User

    A VOUCHER FOR M&S :mad: She can gtf

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