Wedding etiquette - can I wear white lace?

London_Calling · Mar 30, 2009

Maybe dye the wedding dresses not on the bride black or red though, I like that idea.

kabbes · Mar 30, 2009

London_Calling said:
Maybe dye the wedding dresses not on the bride black or red though, I like that idea.

Yes, even better. Can you imagine half the women all being in scarlet red wedding dresses? Awesomeness.

We should be in charge of inventing traditions and customs.

kabbes · Mar 30, 2009

Melinda said:
But can they bring their children Kabbes?

Only if they smoke.

RubyToogood · Mar 30, 2009

I don't think you should wear white to a wedding.

electrogirl · Mar 30, 2009

Pip said:
Well, in principle I'm with you - I was always under the impression that a wedding was a celebration of love, not an Austenesque forum for your conduct to be scrutinised and where any deviation from obsolete, unwritten rules will be gasped and sneered at - but while people still hold those views I want to err on the side of caution and play it safe.

Yes I agree with you. I wouldn't want to piss people off, even if the I think the reason they are getting pissed off is a bit ridiculous.

Would be a shame though because I thik it's a perfect summery weddingy outfit.

Yeah, ask the bride.

Pip · Mar 30, 2009

kabbes said:
Yes, even better. Can you imagine half the women all being in scarlet red wedding dresses? Awesomeness.

We should be in charge of inventing traditions and customs.

Maybe I'll be a pioneer :cool:

I'll stick a thread on the recycling forum for an unwanted red wedding dress.

Madusa · Mar 30, 2009

wear something else or dye it.

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

electrogirl said:
I seriously think that in theory, it seems innapropriate, but on the day, noone is really in their right mind going to think that someone in a white dress was trying to upstage the bride.

And the white dress won't look upstagey in amongst everyone. It'll just look nice.

It looks like a fucking wedding dress

I know plenty people who would want to upstage a bride. Some people are hideously insecure and can't stand not being the centre of attention. Wearing a wedding dress to someone elses wedding would do the trick in that case. Mr Madz's ex wife made sure she upsatged me at my wedding - some people can't help themselves.

And there is no limit to it being the bride and grooms day, neither should there be - if they wanted everyone to dress as pink frogs that would be their perogative. I really don't get this seemingly increasing attitude that weddings are done for the benefit of the guests.

Madusa · Mar 30, 2009

lol, if a friend wore a wedding dress to my wedding, they'd get a beat down.

Melinda · Mar 30, 2009

Dont believe you!

You would totally piss yourself if your mate did that.

_angel_ · Mar 30, 2009

madzone said:
It looks like a fucking wedding dress

I know plenty people who would want to upstage a bride. Some people are hideously insecure and can't stand not being the centre of attention. Wearing a wedding dress to someone elses wedding would do the trick in that case. Mr Madz's ex wife made sure she upsatged me at my wedding - some people can't help themselves.

.

Did she really, or did you just give her the reaction she wanted to make you think she'd 'upstaged' you.

DotCommunist · Mar 30, 2009

Turn up in jeans and one of them Noel Edmunds jumpers.

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

_angel_ said:
Did she really, or did you just give her the reaction she wanted to make you think she'd 'upstaged' you.

I didn't give her any reaction at all. I swallowed everyone's comments and questions about the 'amazing looking woman' who'd just arrived and smiled sweetly as I told them it was his ex wife. They were all suitably embarrassed

Madusa · Mar 30, 2009

Melinda said:
Dont believe you!

You would totally piss yourself if your mate did that.

I'd laugh...maybe but I'd also hand some chocolate cake to one of my many nephews and think it'd be time for some introductions.

Pip · Mar 30, 2009

madzone said:
I didn't give her any reaction at all. I swallowed everyone's comments and questions about the 'amazing looking woman' who'd just arrived and smiled sweetly as I told them it was his ex wife. They were all suitably embarrassed

What did she wear, out of interest? FWIW I really don't think my dress looks like a wedding dress, and it looks nothing like what the bride's going to wear. I'm not nitpicking, but if this woman had been someone you loved rather than your hubby's ex, would you have resented her looking amazing?

5t3IIa · Mar 30, 2009

That looks exactly like my mum's wedding dress

It's a small thing to not wear white to a wedding. I agree with Madzone's sentiment, if not the format it's arrived in.

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

Pip said:
What did she wear, out of interest? FWIW I really don't think my dress looks like a wedding dress, and it looks nothing like what the bride's going to wear. I'm not nitpicking, but if this woman had been someone you loved rather than your hubby's ex, would you have resented her looking amazing?

She wore a skin tight halter neck catsuit - tits akimbo. Someone I loved wouldn't have worn that so it's not relevant. They'd have had more respect.

That dress in the pic DOES look like a wedding dress, Pip. Not a traditional one but a wedding dress all the same.

Paulie Tandoori · Mar 30, 2009

DotCommunist said:
Turn up in jeans and one of them Noel Edmunds jumpers.

Melinda · Mar 30, 2009

madzone said:
I didn't give her any reaction at all. I swallowed everyone's comments and questions about the 'amazing looking woman' who'd just arrived and smiled sweetly as I told them it was his ex wife. They were all suitably embarrassed

If you were so insecure about her, why invite her? Surely having an ex at your wedding is more taboo than wearing a white mini dress.

e2a

madzone said:
She wore a skin tight halter neck catsuit - tits akimbo. Someone I loved wouldn't have worn that so it's not relevant. They'd have had more respect.

OMG!

lyra_k · Mar 30, 2009

I think the white lace dress is gorgeous, and also looks like a wedding dress (looks a bit like the one I got married in the 2nd time actually :hmm:

), but whether or not that means you shouldn't wear it, I have no idea. Isn't this just a really good excuse to go vintage dress shopping and buy yourself another?

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

5t3IIa said:
That looks exactly like my mum's wedding dress

I was just wondering if it's an age thing. Maybe Pip and EG etc are too young to realise that it looks like a wedding dress from the 60's.

Pip · Mar 30, 2009

madzone said:
She wore a skin tight halter neck catsuit - tits akimbo. Someone I loved wouldn't have worn that so it's not relevant. They'd have had more respect.

That dress in the pic DOES look like a wedding dress, Pip. Not a traditional one but a wedding dress all the same.

You're KIDDING?

WTF?! Why would you wear that anywhere, let alone to a wedding? Sorry, but regardless of what you think my dress looks like, it's not even in the same league as a skin tight halter neck fucking catsuit :eek:

trashpony · Mar 30, 2009

I am beginning to think now that you shouldn't wear it as it's probably going to be considered bad taste by people who do remember wedding dresses in the 60s

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

Pip said:
You're KIDDING?
WTF?! Why would you wear that anywhere, let alone to a wedding? Sorry, but regardless of what you think my dress looks like, it's not even in the same league as a skin tight halter neck fucking catsuit

Of course it's not - you're not considering wearing the dress for the same reasons as she wore the catsuit for a start. I mentioned her to highlight that there are women who want to upstage the bride for any number of reasons.

It didn't help that I was 6 mnths pregnant and looked like a beached fuckng whale

Madusa · Mar 30, 2009

Will there be a hot meal at the wedding? If not, wear the wedding dress, Pip. :cool:

Pip · Mar 30, 2009

trashpony said:
I am beginning to think now that you shouldn't wear it as it's probably going to be considered bad taste by people who do remember wedding dresses in the 60s

Yeah this is what I'm worried about, more than what the bride thinks (I'm certain she wouldn't mind). I just don't want to be looked at or talked about :hmm:

AnnO'Neemus · Mar 30, 2009

kabbes said:
...2) If somebody is traditional enough to be bothered about tattoos, there is a good chance that they will also be traditional enough to be bothered about somebody wearing white, so if you are worried about pleasing them, best avoid it.

Wish I had better news for you

QueenOfGoths said:
If they are so conservative that they don't like your tats then they may also be rather conservative about not wearing white - or indeed black - to a wedding, sadly

This. In traditional, conservative terms, wearing white to a wedding is a definite no no. And black is supposed to be 'not the done thing' also, although I would figure that would be less bad and less frowned upon than white to a traditionalist.

But can you ask the bride or maid/matron of honour?

madzone · Mar 30, 2009

Madusa said:
Will there be a hot meal at the wedding? If not, wear the wedding dress, Pip.

Fuck. Right. Off.

Madusa · Mar 30, 2009

madzone said:
Fuck. Right. Off.

5t3IIa · Mar 30, 2009

Pip said:
Yeah this is what I'm worried about, more than what the bride thinks (I'm certain she wouldn't mind). I just don't want to be looked at or talked about

Tbh the awkward parents who disaprove of the tatts are going to be the same people who will look at that dress and think 'Hmm, wedding'. Right age for it. My mum got married in 1972, not 60's, but that's beside the point - it's a 35 year old wedding dress, type thing.

Wedding etiquette - can I wear white lace?

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