Things your pets do that are quite frankly terrifying displays of stupidity

[Yuwipi Woman]

Stupidity test for a dog. When it's sitting or lying there, throw a blanket over its head. If it shakes the blanket off, it's not stupid. If it sits there, and you know it's trying to stare at you through the blanket, it's stupid.

I have co-workers who couldn't pass that test.

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

I have co-workers who couldn't pass that test.

Will they lick your hand for Milk Bones?

 

[Yuwipi Woman]

Will they lick your hand for Milk Bones?

There's a couple of guys who I have difficulty keeping them from trying to lick me, Milk Bones or no Milk Bones.

 

[Mungy]

when i was little our cat used to jump from the shed to the windowsill of my bedroom. when we moved we didn't have a shed or a windowsill, but next door had a fence. the cat jumped from the fence and was hanging onto the wall meeeowing her head off.

our current cat got out of the bedroom window and tried to walk along the edge of the window, when she realised she couldn't do this she tried to turn around and promptly fell off. She yowled. I ran down stair to let her in and she just bombed in it looking shocked.

actually this is the same cat that was licking bleach from the bottle. scared us, that did.

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

The neighbours tell me our cats sleep in the road

Mine used to do that as well. Hardly surprising then that they both got run over within a month of each other

 

[zenie]

He's regularly wormed and been checked .It's something he's done all his life.I think he's just disgusting

Anal glands, they clear them out when they get groomed. Pretty disgusting and smelly job.

I wouldn't worry too much, mention it to the vets, my dog usually does it at other people's houses

 

[Voley]

Our cat's just come in totally covered in shite.

It appears to be too lazy/stupid to clean itself, too.

What's that thing about pets resembling their owners?

 

[Minnie_the_Minx]

Our cat's just come in totally covered in shite.

It appears to be too lazy/stupid to clean itself, too.

What's that thing about pets resembling their owners?

are you going to let him lick and nuzzle you?

 

[wiskey]

my cat did a very stupid and life threatening thing earlier when she repeatedly tried to eat the cheese sandwich i was half way through.

whilst trying not to drop my sandwich i was throwing her away, she'd come back, i'd chuck her off, she'd come back. it went on and on.

i won

i think of all the things i share my house with the gecko is probably the most intelligent.

 

[bellator]

My eldest cat kicks herself in the head on numerous occasions, really don't know why.
She gets into quite an excited state and then lies on the floor and goes for it with her hind legs. Funny to watch but bloody odd.

 

[wiskey]

I think it is grossly unfair to describe fish as stupid. They tend to be pretty good at doing their thing without fuss or mental breakdown.

Imagine them infected with what we call intelligence? In no time at all your pet fish, if they had developed human 'intelligence', would be demanding you supply them with little umbrellas in case of rain.

Imagine the carnage in a crowded fish tank on a rainy day.

lol

 

[zenie]

i think of all the things i share my house with the gecko is probably the most intelligent.

(((dervish)))

 

[Voley]

are you going to let him lick and nuzzle you?

He just tried.

It didn't work.

 

[wiskey]

(((dervish)))

 

[twisted_angel]

Cats are the worst...

Mine jumps in the loo when its flushed.
Jumps in the shower or bath or sink( usually full of pots) at any opportunity
Climbs in washer/dryer which could be lethal if not noticed.
One has a fear of ants so is often seen doing a moonwalk across the patio when being chased by one of the scary little buggers!
Climbs into carrier bags then panics so runs around the house once tangled in one
Tries to catch the flames when the fire is on.

 

[pembrokestephen]

The most terrifying thing about that is the fact there is a dirty fucking cat walking on your work surfaces and pawing the toaster you are eating from.

<vomits>

Yeah, that's the bit that gets me, too. The rabbit might be a little bastard, but at least he doesn't wander around on work surfaces with paws that were not so long ago up to their elbows in dead something or another...

 

[pembrokestephen]

Must. Read. Entire. Thread. Before. Posting.

 

[pembrokestephen]

Hahaha, I might have known the hygiene brigade would turn up. I haven't died of any cat related disease yet and he regularly sticks his head in the kettle too. The other one sleeps on my face. I'm still here. I'm guessing you've never had a cat, or you'd know that if they want to sit on the counters there's sod all you can do about it. I suggest you don't get one because you'd have to get some sort of bio-suit to keep out the horrible deadly dirty cat germs. And this on a board where many of the occupants regularly snort substances off surfaces in public loos! Hilarious.

Toxoplasmosis. It doesn't kill you, but it can fuck your liver up for good, and cause all kinds of other problems, especially if you have a compromised immune system.

Sure, you may not die of it, but you'll excuse me for finding the idea of wilfully infecting myself with something that's almost impossible to eradicate, and whose effects aren't all that well understood, an unpleasant one...

 

[Peaglenut]

My cat knows that a near death experience is jumping up onto the work surfaces. Had him when the kids were small so I couldnt be doing with it. Cant be too careful with little kids. Some people don't mind it but I dont like it.
I ONCE went to a friends house for coffee and when I was picked up later by my then hubby I was asked if I had enjoyed my coffee? Yeah, why??
Answer was " When I arrived their cat was rubbing it's arsehole on the spout of their kettle"
Our cat has fallen into the pond a few times times though. Thats stupid.

 

[PursuedByBears]

Toxoplasmosis. It doesn't kill you, but it can fuck your liver up for good, and cause all kinds of other problems, especially if you have a compromised immune system.

Sure, you may not die of it, but you'll excuse me for finding the idea of wilfully infecting myself with something that's almost impossible to eradicate, and whose effects aren't all that well understood, an unpleasant one...

Toxoplasmosis, pah!

Our little dangercat Archie regularlly tries to nuzzle/put his smell on naked candle flames, lighted spliffs etc

 

[billy_bob]

My dog regularly drinks the sea when he gets too hot on the beach. Invariably ends up vomiting yellowy foam on our carpet afterwards.

And frequently has to be prevented from wagging whilst standing with his back to the open fire. He's got a big basil brush tail that I suspect would go up like a bush fire if he got too close.

And I've seen him run headlong into a lamppost without even attempting to put the breaks on. I swear he did exactly what a cartoon animal would do in such circumstances - sat down on his haunches, shook his head comically and looked around stupidly for a moment - before getting up and charging off again as if nothing had happened.

 

[xes]

one of my dogs knocked himself out the other day. He ran head first into a post in the garden,he was after the ever illusive rat. Being half blind doesn't help is cause,but it certainly doesn't stop him

 

[Epona]

Toxoplasmosis. It doesn't kill you, but it can fuck your liver up for good, and cause all kinds of other problems, especially if you have a compromised immune system.

Sure, you may not die of it, but you'll excuse me for finding the idea of wilfully infecting myself with something that's almost impossible to eradicate, and whose effects aren't all that well understood, an unpleasant one...

Toxoplasmosis is only carried by a percentage of cats, it's by no means endemic, and unless you have a compromised immune system you catch it, fight it off (usually with no symptoms, or mild flu-like symptoms), and develop antibodies which give you lifelong immunity. The vast majority of people who have had any sort of contact with a few cats have already been exposed to it and are immune.

Obviously if anyone has an immune problem they should be careful with all sorts of things to avoid infections, not just cats, and cats are no more dirty or likely to spread disease than other animals.

The one caveat I would add is that toxoplasmosis can be extremely harmful to foetuses, but if someone who has contact with cats is planning a pregnancy the chances are that they are already immune and should ask their GP for a blood test to confirm the presence of antibodies, which also protect the foetus. It really isn't half as dangerous as it's made out to be, for healthy adults.

The main vector for infection isn't even from cats, it's from handling uncooked or undercooked pork, lamb, or venison!

 

[Cloo]

Chimneypot the cat does this thing where, when the back door's open she runs into the kitchen. And out. And in. And out.... aaaand in. And out. And in. And.... out. And in etc for some time. WTF?

 

[seeformiles]

If it's raining outside and I open the back door to let the cat in, she runs inside and 2 minutes later asks to be let out again - expecting the weather to have changed. She then acts disappointed when it's still raining and proceeds to repeat this process several times (with similar results) - cat logic for you!

 

[ScallyWag II]

Sam, my youngest cat has recently started to develop a habit of trying to use his paw as a door stop when I'm closing the back door.

None of the others have any dangerous habits...that I know of There have been one-off incidents such as Dave jumping out of a first floor bedroom window when he was a kitten, landing in my tomatoes thankfully (that window has not been opened since so that habit was not allowed to develop!)