things drivers do that irritate the fuck out of you

[Poi E]

I would disagree with this - it's the pedestrian's right of way and if you approach the turning in a sensible way it should be clear to following drivers that you intend to give way ....

.

And hell man, if you hit them, they can get fucked up big time! Not nice. Traffic in London moves slowly, drivers expect a bit of start/stop so I reckon let the hippy cross. He might be a future dealer-think about that!

 

[ICB]

so what about the driver/cyclist/ped who needs to know your course, but whom you haven't seen because they're in your blind spot/you didn't know they might emerge from that direction etc. etc.

Doesn't happen

 

[comstock]

Lazy cunts who can't be arsed to get off their fat arses and ring on someone's door, so they wait outside a house blasting on their horn for an eternity.

Totally agree.

And the number of people who (even in the early hours of the morning! ) feel the need to sound the horn to 'say' goodbye to someone who they only spoke "goodbye" to 5 seconds ago is amazing Unlike music I tend to find horns wake me even through earplugs

In my ideal world, the horn should have a finite number of 'toots' and then should have to be recharged at the cost of a tenner.

Yes I know, being without a horn in an emergency etc, but I can dream....(or not if people wake me with their horns )

 

[Poi E]

Totally agree.

And the number of people who (even in the early hours of the morning! ) feel the need to sound the horn to say 'goodbye' to someone who the said goodbye to 5 seconds ago is amazing Unlike music I tend to find horns wake me even through earplugs

In my ideal world, the horn should have a finite number of 'toots' and then should have to be recharged at the cost of a tenner.

(yes I know, being without a horn in an emergency etc, but I can dream....or not if people wake me with their horns )

It's the fuckers who use it like a brake pedal that piss me off, leaning on the things when sitting in traffic. Yeah, of course your honking is going to improve traffic flow, you neanderthal cunt.

 

[editor]

I'd like a law that gives people the right to use whatever means necessary to stop a persistent car alarm at 4am in the morning if the owner fails to respond to if after an hour of keeping the neighbours awake.

Oh, and talking of noise, here's another thing that pisses me off: rude, selfish tossers who play their music at massive levels in the early hours in suburban areas. There's wankers who fill up at the petrol station outside my block in the middle of the night and leave their doors wide open so half the town has to suffer their pathetic "woo-hooh baby" wussy r'n'b drivel.

Tossers!

 

[Poi E]

I'd like a law that gives people the right to use whatever means necessary to stop a persistent car alarm at 4am in the morning if the owner fails to respond to if after an hour of keeping the neighbours awake.!

It does around New Cross!

 

[liquidlunch]

i hate people who bust a gut to pass you and once having done that slow up and slow your progress.idiots

 

[Poi E]

i hate people who bust a gut to pass you and once having done that slow up and slow your progress.idiots

They pass road trains?!

 

[comstock]

Oh, and talking of noise, here's another thing that pisses me off: rude, selfish tossers who play their music at massive levels in the early hours in suburban areas. There's wankers who fill up at the petrol station outside my block in the middle of the night and leave their doors wide open so half the town has to suffer their pathetic "woo-hooh baby" wussy r'n'b drivel.

Tossers!

An argument could be made that petrol stations in residential aeras shouldn't be open 24 hours. Cars have a much bigger 'range' than years ago. If people knew there was no fuel after say 11pm, they would fill up in advance.

That said why should sensible people who want to live a 24/7 lifestyle miss out on late night munchies etc beacuse of a few tossers?

 

[Griff]

At Last! But only for a week.

 

[dirtysanta]

At Last! But only for a week.

Too tame ! Personally I'd like to see.....

" Oi, Cockend ! Your only doing 65 and your in the cunting fastlane. Get the fuck over to the lefthand lane, NOW "

 

[MikeMcc]

...
Assuming that because the speed limit is 30mph it's safe to do 30. A speed limit is just that - a limit, not something you have to (or should) drive right up to all the time.
...

You are actually expected to keep reasonable close to the speed limit (called making normal road progress - it can contribute to failing a driving test if you do so persistantly). Though I agree that it does depend on the road and weather conditions. There are roads, especially those with alot of parked cars, where driving at 30 would probably amount to criminal negligence if you hit some one!

 

[kerplunk]

There's a guy that drives past my house at the same time every day and honks his horn before he goes around every corner. Not sure why he does it - I know Nicholas Witchell does it because he thinks it's safer. If I am sitting by a window at the right time, I can hear him approach, pass by and fade into the distance again.

Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk Honk

(Fidel - not sure if one of us has misread the other's post but I was not having a pop at you about anything. )

Maybe he's from some place abroad where it's mandatory (eg carribean) or possibly a fork-lift driver...

 

[kerplunk]

There are roads, especially those with alot of parked cars, where driving at 30 would probably amount to criminal negligence if you hit some one!

No 'probably' about it - I failed my first driving test for this (driving at 30 that is, not hitting someone!)

 

[subversplat]

In my ideal world, the horn should have a finite number of 'toots' and then should have to be recharged at the cost of a tenner.

On one hippie-mobile I've had the dubious pleasure of moving from site to site, the horn button has fallen off and the horn electrics are two copper spikes which, to activate the horn if it's necessary, require you to either find a bit of metal to short them or thrust your hand onto the spikes and stab yourself to short it out that way.

Maybe this idea could be expanded?

 

[Juice Terry]

You know the scene, big line of cars all doing 65 in the fast lane overtaking some nobend sitting in the middle doing 60, everyones patiently waiting their turn to get through and speed up again, you leave a nice safe gap to the car in front and then some cunt undertakes you leaving a gap of about 6 inches between bumpers as if you're the one causing the hold up. I really have to force myself not to drive 6 inches off their bumper for the next five miles.

 

[ICB]

You know the scene, big line of cars all doing 65 in the fast lane overtaking some nobend sitting in the middle doing 60, everyones patiently waiting their turn to get through and speed up again, you leave a nice safe gap to the car in front and then some cunt undertakes you leaving a gap of about 6 inches between bumpers as if you're the one causing the hold up. I really have to force myself not to drive 6 inches off their bumper for the next five miles.

It's enough to make you want to reverse your headlight washers and fill them up with paint stripper

 

[Roadkill]

You are actually expected to keep reasonable close to the speed limit (called making normal road progress - it can contribute to failing a driving test if you do so persistantly). Though I agree that it does depend on the road and weather conditions. There are roads, especially those with alot of parked cars, where driving at 30 would probably amount to criminal negligence if you hit some one!

Yes, you can be failed for undue hesitation and caution - and quite right too, because the roads are crowded and someone too timid to approach the speed limit is a nuisance and a danger to other road users. However, no driving examiner in his right mind is going to pass someone who breezes along at 30mph in a built-up area, assuming it's okay because he's doing the speed limit but with no regard to potential hazards.

You're supposed to exercise judgement when driving and adjust your speed to the conditions. Someone who doesn't do that and assumes that 'speed limit' equates to 'safe speed' shouldn't have (and hopefully wouldn't usually be given) a driving licence.

 

[gentlegreen]

And hell man, if you hit them, they can get fucked up big time! Not nice. Traffic in London moves slowly, drivers expect a bit of start/stop so I reckon let the hippy cross. He might be a future dealer-think about that!

And this particular hippy has been known to cross his street very slowly and obliquely carrying bags of shopping and ignore the morons aiming to use up all their gears before they reach the end of it
(I've had 'em almost touching me and honking their horns)

 

[Major Tom]

drivers who honk their horn at cyclists because they want to turn left, but the cyclist is already going along the edge of the road in front of them, where the turn off is, preventing them from doing so immediately - the stupid cunts can't wait 10 seconds.
I always make sure they need to wait much longer then if they hadn;t honked.

The ones that drive along side you with their window wound down and stereo on full blast drowing out whatever I'm listening to.

The ones who go straight on at a left only lane - and then honking me to get out of their way as if I was the one in the fucking wrong.

 

[Poi E]

And this particular hippy has been known to cross his street very slowly and obliquely carrying bags of shopping and ignore the morons aiming to use up all their gears before they reach the end of it
(I've had 'em almost touching me and honking their horns)

Hippy juice is hard to get off your bonnet, so best to let the hippy pass.

 

[gentlegreen]

Hippy juice is hard to get off your bonnet, so best to let the hippy pass.

What I meant was I am that hippy

 

[Poi E]

What I meant was I am that hippy

at me.

As you can see I've been a bit hippyish over the weekend myself...

 

[gentlegreen]

at me.

As you can see I've been a bit hippyish over the weekend myself...

No probs

What really annoys me is that for historical reasons my tiny street is formally designated as a B road. Maybe this explains the council's reluctance to deploy traffic calming....

Luckily it's one-way so not very useful to rat-runners.

 

[Poi E]

Traffic calming in the form of speed humps can be a bit of a problem, I've noticed, when there are gaps between the humps. I've had idiots swerving into the middle of the road to avoid humps, oblivious to oncoming traffic.

 

[Major Tom]

there's a road near me that comes off the A20 and has a little bit of one-way road at the junction to stop traffic coming off the A20 and into it.

The number of times I've been cycling along it (the legal direction) and had a van or black-cab suddenly appear in front of me coming the wrong way up the road and demand that I get out of their way. They don;t usually slow down - I have to jump pretty quickly - then I get a quick burst of swearing from behind me too - 'cunt' is the only word I'm sure I've heard - before they're gone.

I guess I shouldn't attempted to cycle down that stretch of the road when it was so obviously reserved for someone else.

 

[JWH]

kerplunk: aah, that might be an idea. I have glimpsed through the sunroof of the car and see that it is a middle-aged black guy, so it is conceiveable that he learned the habit somewhere in caribbean where it was compulsory - although he's probably not. And you would have thought that after the first month of everyone else NOT honking their horn every time they went around a corner he'd get the hint. In fact, do you think that he's constantly in a froth of righteous indignation (like me) because he thinks "God, these lot are CRAP drivers, they don't honk their horn ever"?

In my ideal world, the horn should have a finite number of 'toots' and then should have to be recharged at the cost of a tenner.

I would suggest a kind of black box in every car that records the last thirty seconds on a rolling loop. A horn should be able to hoot only once and would cost £50 to refill unless you could replay the black box and prove that there was an immediate danger that meant you had to use it.

 

[Fidel]

kerplunk: aah, that might be an idea. I have glimpsed through the sunroof of the car and see that it is a middle-aged black guy, so it is conceiveable that he learned the habit somewhere in caribbean where it was compulsory - although he's probably not. And you would have thought that after the first month of everyone else NOT honking their horn every time they went around a corner he'd get the hint. In fact, do you think that he's constantly in a froth of righteous indignation (like me) because he thinks "God, these lot are CRAP drivers, they don't honk their horn ever"?

Out here (Brasil) everyone honks all the time at, dogs, bikes, kids, adults, gorups of people sitting at bus stops, at someone to open the gate for them, before over taking, whilst over taking, quick thank you toot after overtaking and of course single woman walking on there own...Quiet they aint!

I once asked a someone why he did not use his indicaters? ´Because if I did they did they would know what I am going to do next and try to fuck me up´

 

[Major Tom]

I once asked a someone why he did not use his indicaters? ´Because if I did they did they would know what I am going to do next and try to fuck me up´

If I indicate on multi lane traffic that I wish to switch lanes (cycling) I usually find that the car behind me accelerates to make sure its in front of me - and the one behind him does it too, etc. This usually involves me being bumped back out of the lane I was trying to get into. So I've evolved a method which involves getting into the edges of the lane to my right or left depending which way I want to go and then sticking my arm out and maneuvreing quite quickly while going at about the same speed as the traffic behind me. This often gets me a honk from the vehicle I've pulled in front of - but its the only way I can do it.

And this morning some cunt in a white van going round the IMAC to go onto Waterloo Bridge actaully tried to run me off the fucking road so he could undertake me. I ended up bashing on his window in an attempt to acknowledge what his fuckwittery might achieve, ie, me under his fucking wheels.

 

[bigbry]

• keep the car/van running for half an hour when they're parked up outside your flat at 2 in the fucking morning
• really crappy gear changes: <CRUU-UUU-UNK>
• speed up to get to a junction where they don't even have right of way, just as you're crossing the road
• drive into box junctions during traffic jams
• confuse 'STOP' signs for 'PERHAPS SLOW DOWN, A TEENSY BIT' signs

You can drive into box junctions if your exit will be clear when lights change/traffic moves