The Trouser Frustration Thread

Discussion in 'threads and dreads' started by Orang Utan, Mar 12, 2014.

  1. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    Why do they so rarely fit?
    Why do they keep falling down?
    Why can't they make more trousers that don't show your arsecrack when you sit down on a bench or bend over?
    Why do shirts keep coming untucked from them?
    Are they rubbish because of inadequate consideration of varying body shapes by designers or are we rubbish consumers for not knowing how to choose or wear trousers properly?

    (Jeans included in the preceding trouser rant)
  2. Corax

    Corax Luke 5:16

    Can't say I have these issues. Maybe it's the make?

    My wardrobe's mainly George, with a soupcon of Matalan and the odd bit of Jaspar Conran for those rare posh occasions.
  3. pogofish

    pogofish Testicle Hairstyle

    You have just reached the age where "stretchy" trousers become an interesting wardrobe choice! :p :eek:
  4. beesonthewhatnow

    beesonthewhatnow going deaf for a living

    A proper tailor is your friend :)

    Might not be so friendly to your bank balance though :hmm:
  5. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    Maybe a poll is in order. I assumed everyone has this problem.

    I shop mostly at TK Maxx and House Of Fraser cos I'm lazy, so have a variety of brands of trouser.

    The only brand of jeans that I've found always fit me are Nudies but I can't afford those anymore :(
  6. Voley

    Voley Ramoner

    Oh yeah :cool:
  7. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    I have a reasonably proportioned waist for my build but a little middle-aged pot belly, like many of us.
    Part of the frustration of this is the over or under dilemma!
  8. Voley

    Voley Ramoner

  9. toblerone3

    toblerone3 Grrrrr

    cesare, monsterbunny, Onket and 2 others like this.
  10. Gingerman

    Gingerman Is a great bunch of lads.....

    Ive reached the elastic waistband stage as well :(
  11. 8115

    8115 sitting down is bad for you

    Fnarr fnarr. That is all.

    Maybe you need a belt?
    Pickman's model, _angel_ and Greebo like this.
  12. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    Belts bring in a whole shoulder of other problems
  13. Ax^

    Ax^ Silly Rabbit

    First world problems thread --------->
    Pickman's model and Greebo like this.
  14. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    I was measured as a 44, but they fell down, I bought 42 which were ok then, now they fall down.
    Now I may be a 40, I just use a decent belt!
  15. 8115

    8115 sitting down is bad for you

    You don't wear a belt? Speaking as a lady, there's no way I'd wear trousers without a belt.

    What are the shoulder (?) of other problems a belt brings?
  16. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    Not for jeans, but certainly for trousers!
  17. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    A belt can pinch too much.
    It may stop your arse hanging out, but it can also interfere with whatever's tucked into your keks.
  18. Hocus Eye.

    Hocus Eye. Snap, crop, scrap crap

    Clothes designers aren't interested in your body shape. You just have to be tall and thin to wear modern clothes. If you don't fit that pre-conceived image then you are not suitable for the designer's clothes. I imagine when those same designers get old and fat they have their own clothes made to measure.

    I am short and fat so I do understand the problem.
    kebabking and Greebo like this.
  19. eatmorecheese

    eatmorecheese Be who you needed when you were younger

    I have always had a troubled relationship with trousers, from an early age, so I totally sympathise. It's not my build, so it must be the way I walk or what trousers I choose.

    Mine generally wear out at the crotch (the crotch, ffs). What the hell is wrong with me? :mad:
  20. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    I'm not short and fat though. Just who are these clothes made for? Is it for the shortly arriving svelte yet domineering reptilian overlords?
  21. Ax^

    Ax^ Silly Rabbit

    Get a utility belt

    Greebo and Orang Utan like this.
  22. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    Jeans shopping recently and in a more fashionable (aimed at young people) store they just didn't stock my size at all, I am not humungous but it was as if I just didn't exist! Wankers! And the prat working there could not even measure my waist, and that isn't exactly rocket science. I ended up going to M&S where it seems they do cater for people like me.
  23. spanglechick

    spanglechick High Empress of Dressing Up

    cesare, Onket and toblerone3 like this.
  24. ViolentPanda

    ViolentPanda Hardly getting over it.

    If you're at a 40" waist, then the only two mainstream brands (unless you're buying Levi imports direct from the US market) who cater for you are some designs of Wranglers, and Lee Cooper (who, IIRC, go up to 42").
  25. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    M&S brand, from Bangladesh, 40s & falling down, perhaps I am a 38 now. :)
  26. monsterbunny

    monsterbunny Well-Known Member

    Properly tailored trousers look better when hung from the shoulder with braces. High waisted trousers conceal the encroaching middle spread.

    The low waisted cuts of modern trousers are partly to blame for poor fits. Technically the waist is measured around the navel not around the hips - which is where most people hang their jeans and trousers nowadays. It's simply corporate vanity sizing that enables deluded dimwits to pretend they're a 34" waist while their distended 42" gut protrudes above the belt, Jeremy Clarkson style.
  27. dessiato

    dessiato Ua Mau ke Ea o ka ʻĀina i ka Pono

    A properly fitted pair, and a decent belt should give you no problems. If you can get a pair and have them adjusted to fit, and wear a decent belt. Properly fitted trousers shouldn't need a belt, but one will finish the look and will stop the issues of builders bum.
  28. Orang Utan

    Orang Utan razzed up on scrumpy and injustice

    Getting them made is not a practical answer. I want off the peg keks that fit.
    Where does Simon Cowell get his?​
  29. sojourner

    sojourner Where's me readers?

    This is called a 'kench' in Wigan.

    Thought that was worth sharing :cool:
    farmerbarleymow likes this.
  30. gentlegreen

    gentlegreen Hand-wringing liberal.

    Oversized combats and a cycle inner tube for a belt.
    Though I swear the couple of pairs I bought last autumn are less roomy than previous ones. :hmm:

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