The office 'scolding email' thread

Discussion in 'education & employment' started by Badgers, Nov 14, 2006.

  1. BoatieBird

    BoatieBird Well-Known Member

  2. Lazy Llama

    Lazy Llama Suburban robots that monitor reality

    This was on the toilet door at a hostel I stayed at in Brisbane in 2005.
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2017
  3. BoatieBird

    BoatieBird Well-Known Member

  4. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

  5. mx wcfc

    mx wcfc Well-Known Member

    Not an email, but an actual direct verbal telling off, in front of colleagues.

    "Mx, you have to put your coat in the cupboard. You're not allowed to leave it on the back of your chair like that."

    Me. Stunned silence, followed by desperately repressing urge to use inappropriate language in a professional setting.

    "Yes Miss, sorry Miss"

    New Office, New Bullshit :rolleyes::thumbs:
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2017
  6. a_chap

    a_chap When the world came apart, where were you?

    We have the same rule on the grounds, naturally, of "health and safety".

    So I insist on draping my cycling jacket over the back of my chair. My argument is that it's hi-viz and therefore reduces the chance of someone, er, falling over my chair.
  7. mx wcfc

    mx wcfc Well-Known Member

    I think it's just the office manager who has a thing about tidiness. She works hard and does a very good job, but she is a bit hung up on everything being "just so" - the office looking like it does in the brochure - all clear desks, shiny smiley people, who do what she tells them. God help her when she has kids. She was really upset when one of the coffee machines didn't work and there was a queue for caffeine. Moving office is a major ballache for the organiser, and I told her that if one coffee machine not working was the worse thing that had gone wrong, that was a pretty good result. She seemed to like that. But that was before I got told off over my coat.
    marty21, Voley, muscovyduck and 3 others like this.
  8. emanymton

    emanymton A cat politely sat on the flaming gardener.

    Well there are some people who urm, well you know. Yeah enough about that.
    cupid_stunt and Badgers like this.
  9. existentialist

    existentialist FiVe ᵈAʸs tᵒ FʳᵉeᵈOᵐ

    Not many. And I suspect even they're likely to want milk from specific lizards/breasts, not something random from a communal fridge.
    Last edited: Oct 25, 2017
    Badgers likes this.
  10. emanymton

    emanymton A cat politely sat on the flaming gardener.

    Yes it probably has to be fresh for them.
    Badgers likes this.
  11. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

  12. dervish

    dervish if you flibble when you wibble, don't wobble

    Is the wandering person not on the floor they wanted then?
    Badgers likes this.
  13. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

    not the floor they wanted, nor indeed in a building where they were permitted to be. if you look upthread you'll see my post about the key to the poison cupboard going missing, and they might easily have found that. if they'd read this thread and knew where i work.
  14. Artaxerxes

    Artaxerxes Well-Known Member

    1) That is not how an invitation works you fucking bellend.

    2) This sounds like basically telling us we are all fired and our jobs are going to India.

    3) I'm not going to be arsed doing much work today I guess. Oh well.
    equationgirl and a_chap like this.
  15. cybershot

    cybershot Well-Known Member

    Love the amount of notice given for staff outside of London, taking into account that in my personal opinion, email is not an urgent form of communication. Some people may not read that until much later in the day and then suddenly have to arrange travel arrangements, and possible alternative arrangements to get children to school and what not.

    Proper shitty behaviour.
  16. Artaxerxes

    Artaxerxes Well-Known Member

    Yeah I only hope they've given the non-London guys a weeks notice or more on the quiet. Just lucky theres only a small handful of them.

    This entire last few months have been awful from a communication point of view, as in there has been none apart from telling us the entire service was under review 3 months ago.
    equationgirl and Badgers like this.
  17. cupid_stunt

    cupid_stunt Dyslexic King Cnut the Great.

    That's shit, I hope things are OK for you, good luck.
    Voley, equationgirl and Badgers like this.
  18. ChrisFilter

    ChrisFilter Like a boss.

    Just popped back in to share this beaut:

    Take the Diet Pepsi challenge....

    Try leaving it in the 8th floor fridge next time (top shelf, where I left it) and try buying your own. This is not a student house (“All property is theft”, “It’s only a can of Pepsi”, “I was thirsty, OK?”, “I thought you only drank Horlicks”) and have some respect, you light fingered scumbag.

    If you want to nick them off the company (which is also out of order), they buy Diet Coke, for the record
    farmerbarleymow, TikkiB, Me76 and 7 others like this.
  19. Badgers

    Badgers Mr Big Shrimp!

    Some good news :)
  20. souljacker

    souljacker A bit of skullduggery

    Tight bastards having the christmas party in January.
    Badgers likes this.
  21. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

  22. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

  23. a_chap

    a_chap When the world came apart, where were you?

    No wonder there's not much of a response if they keep leaving out all the important words in the email.
  24. Schmetterling

    Schmetterling I saw something nasty in the woodshed!

    That is not from the same person who is normally our source of mirth, is it? Their use of English is very different.
    Badgers and Pickman's model like this.
  25. Pickman's model

    Pickman's model Every man and every woman is a star

    Someone rather more senior
  26. quiet guy

    quiet guy Bimbling along

    Used to have the same shit when I worked for PO and the response rates were always added as a KPI for each division which affected our end of year bonus.
    Badgers and Pickman's model like this.
  27. Rutita1

    Rutita1 Scum with no integrity, apparently.

    Did I ever post about an email I received from a senior manager entitled 'Nicknames'.

    It detailed his concern about the use of nicknames in our organisation and said that he didn't believe 'Tory-John' was acceptable.

    I couldn't argue with the points he made tbf but he completely missed the point. The person called Tory-John was the opposite of that, hence the nickname.
  28. mx wcfc

    mx wcfc Well-Known Member

    They do this at my place too. The results are confidential and anonymous. Only we get reports back that read "100% of males at grade x who have been employed for more than 15 years in y dept are thoroughly fucked off with the whole thing" . And then the bosses wonder why we don't take part anymore.
  29. Bahnhof Strasse

    Bahnhof Strasse Free the Sepsis Six!

  30. Winot

    Winot I wholeheartedley agree with your viewpoint

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