The fucking cat has just scoffed my cheese!

[QueenOfGoths]

When we first got Charlie of Doom we came home to find he'd pushed a wine glass off the worktop and smashed it. Then he'd carried the broken pieces to various places around the house and hidden them. Lolz

Since then he can't resist pushing all manner of things off high places - mainly it's pens, but books are good too.

He walks on the worktops. Ours are arranged so he has to be on one of them to look out the window, but he rarely goes on the main food prep one. Tbh though, I'm not that bothered. I mean, he licks my face while I lie in bed, so I can't be that fussy.

That made me laugh so much

My husband foolishly turned his back on some cooked chicken yesterday only to turn round and see Mr. Kippers licking his lips and with a smug "You'll never know if I actually licked that or not" look on his face.

He climbs on the worktops as well. But then he does basically own the house. We are merely his tenants and pay him rent in the form of biscuits, tuna fllakes and foot biting. He on us, obviously

 

[Vintage Paw]

That made me laugh so much

My husband foolishly turned his back on some cooked chicken yesterday only to turn round and see Mr. Kippers licking his lips and with a smug "You'll never know if I actually licked that or not" look on his face.

He climbs on the worktops as well. But then he does basically own the house. We are merely his tenants and pay him rent in the form of biscuits, tuna fllakes and foot biting. He on us, obviously

The thing is, all I could think was that he'd cut his mouth, but he seemed perfectly happy

Ah, the 'not knowing whether they licked your food' problem ... what you don't know can't hurt you

 

[Mrs Magpie]

Tell them about the dog and the loaves of bread you left on the side. That was hilarious. (after I'd finished worrying about his stomach)

Oh yeah, two whole loaves of daktyla.....but he's a Labrador...what more do I need to say?

 

[Detroit City]

My cat nicks olives if he gets the chance. Mad for them he is....only green ones as far as I know.

is he nicking vodka and vermouth also?

you better check the cabinet

 

[KeyboardJockey]

Tipsy one of our females recently had a litter of kittens and decided that the weather was warm enough and the other cats were getting on her nerves to move her kittens outside.

I fear Tipsy may be somewhat shortsighted. She walked right past the kitten to a bag of noodles which is the same colour as the kitten picked up the bag of noodles and trotted off with it as if it was the kitten. Mad, we've got a cat that mistakes a bag of noodles for her kitten.

Noodles and kitten were quickly interchanged by me after I'd finished laughing my arse off.

 

[geminisnake]

I chucked the rest away, luckily I had some more in the fridge.

Why?? If the cat had already eaten some why not just leave the rest and let the cat have it tomorrow?? That's what I would have done. Or are you not wanting it to eat cheese at all?

 

[QueenOfGoths]

Tipsy one of our females recently had a litter of kittens and decided that the weather was warm enough and the other cats were getting on her nerves to move her kittens outside.

I fear Tipsy may be somewhat shortsighted. She walked right past the kitten to a bag of noodles which is the same colour as the kitten picked up the bag of noodles and trotted off with it as if it was the kitten. Mad, we've got a cat that mistakes a bag of noodles for her kitten.

Noodles and kitten were quickly interchanged by me after I'd finished laughing my arse off.

Aw sweet . Noodles was the second choice name for our cat

 

[ajk]

Why?? If the cat had already eaten some why not just leave the rest and let the cat have it tomorrow?? That's what I would have done. Or are you not wanting it to eat cheese at all?

Cheese isn't particularly good for cats, it can make them constipated.

Mind you, olives probably aren't brilliant either due to the preservatives and high salt content, but everything in moderation and all that. My dog loves fried onions, but apparently they're verboten as well. Darned thing eats healthier than I do.

 

[dogmatique]

When I was growing up, we had one of the (now) old style cookers that had the grill at eye level (like it should be!), and the grill pan always had some fat in it. I always thought, for some reason, that fat got a bit stringy, and hair-like in places, especially on the grill pan.

It was only years later that I finally caught our moggie stood on the cooker with her hind legs, stretching up and licking away at the grill pan, and depositing her white chin hairs on the cooker.

How could I have missed that?

Mind you, I'm the same kid who grew up near an airport thinking that the rumble of engines was clouds rubbing together.

 

[moose]

Moose, mine sniffs the air and does a face like a lion noticing a lioness on heat and would eat a bowlful if allowed. If I have olives on the table I have to put a plate over them and keep the cat from trying various lines of approach onto the table.....

We have that problem with curry He seems completely immune to hot spices.

 

[malice]

read this thread title, and said to my sister (who lurks here as well) - guess a surburban thread title dual-themed combo. she got cats on first guess, cheese on second. tee hee

as for olives, yep, cats and salty thing is always likely, ours is a marmite fiend

 

[Detroit City]

as for olives, yep, cats and salty thing is always likely, ours is a marmite fiend

i've never heard of that

 

[dogmatique]

Ours sniff round olives, paw them if they can, but never eat.

 

[Detroit City]

Ours sniff round olives, paw them if they can, but never eat.

they're just playing with them cause they're round and move about

 

[Badger Kitten]

Miff is mad for crisps and twiglets

But compared to your cats, she is a good girl.

Or too fat to get on worktop

 

[Geri]

Why?? If the cat had already eaten some why not just leave the rest and let the cat have it tomorrow?? That's what I would have done. Or are you not wanting it to eat cheese at all?

Because that would be rewarding her bad behaviour! Although butchers got it out of the bin and gave it to her anyway.

I don't mind her eating cheese - it was half fat anyway (not that she needs to lose weight, unlike me )

 

[Mrs Magpie]

Miff is mad for crisps

When I were a lass there used to be graffiti all over the place that said "Cats like plain crisps"

 

[Mrs Magpie]

There's a picture of a wall with the previously mentioned graffiti from 1973 on this site.....

http://www.wussu.com/squatting/grosroad.htm

 

[kittyP]

When I was living at home, I made a bowl of custard that was too hot and left it on the coffee table to cool....

... came back 5 mins later to find cat with front paws in the bowl, over half gone and custard all over her face and whiskers.

She walked off in a very 'just been caught' manner.
She looked very shifty like she was trying to hide it but left a trail of custard paw prints all across the living room

 

[hendo]

My neighbour used to think she'd trained her cat not to jump on the worktop, but if you walked past whilst she was at work, you'd see him through the window, joyfully cavorting about on it.

Ms T posting

Our cats are not allowed on the worktops, so every time I go into the kitchen I hear a thud as one of them jumps down from the sink. They like to sit by it and look out of the window.

 

[Bakunin]

Ms T posting

Our cats are not allowed on the worktops, so every time I go into the kitchen I hear a thud as one of them jumps down from the sink. They like to sit by it and look out of the window.

Of course they do.

They are not only displaying their traditional lack of regard for authority (as 'Pah, mere humans think they own ME?') but they're also looking at the local wildlife and deciding, as cultured predators, whether there's any new species that might make them want to eat out tonight.

 

[lillia]

When I was living at home, I made a bowl of custard that was too hot and left it on the coffee table to cool....

... came back 5 mins later to find cat with front paws in the bowl, over half gone and custard all over her face and whiskers.

She walked off in a very 'just been caught' manner.
She looked very shifty like she was trying to hide it but left a trail of custard paw prints all across the living room

My cat Moomin did that once, but with a grill pan full of sausage fat I'd left on the side for washing - she's got very long fur and her whole face was greased up - took bloody ages to get her clean.

She likes eating fruit a lot - grapes are a fave, but once she ate clementine segments - got proper feral over them as well - which kind of negates the whole 'cats hate citrus thing'.

My sister's cats go mad for bleach. Which is wierd.

 

[idioteque]

One of mine loves marmite on toast. She's normally so picky she won't eat wet food. She lives off biscuits and cooked chicken.