OK then. In order of preference the prize for top dog in the Tort Festival Awards 2008 goes to:
<Opens Envelope>
1 – Glastonbury. Bottom of the pile last year, Glasto stormed back to form with some great new attractions, loads more late night stuff and generally a much better atmosphere all round.
Best Acts – Bison / Balkan Beat Box / Tunng
Other Highlights – Trash City / Shangri La / Flagtopia
Low Points – The return of the tent thieves
Tort’s Festival Rating 9.5/10
2 – Knockengorroch World Ceilidh. A full 4 dayer this time to celebrate this being the 20th “Knocky” and a romantic return to the place Strange-Fish & I first got it together.
Best Acts – Orkestra Del Sol / Shlomo / Daevid Allen
Other Highlights – An extra day in paradise
Low Points – Midges
Tort’s Festival Rating 9/10
3 – Solfest. Retained its Top 3 ranking this year despite soggy ground conditions causing problems with the build. We were able to get onsite on Thursday for the first time.
Best Acts – Bad Manners / Misty’s Big Adventure / Alabama 3
Other Highlights – Fancy Dress, Tequila Sunrises & the Saturday Night Fever dancefloor
Low Points – Traffic queues for those arriving Friday
Tort’s Festival Rating 8.5/10
4 – Beatherder. We were only there for one night but it had us itching for more. Lots of mad stuff in the trees with Pendle Hill as a brooding backdrop.
Best Acts – Lancashire Hotpots / Acid Faerie Brass Band / Grinny Grandad
Other Highlights – The Working Men’s Club & dancing in the woods
Low Points – Slippery underfoot
Tort’s Festival Rating 8/10
5 – Bearded Theory. Brand new, tiny, the first of the season and only £12 for a ticket. Bargain of the summer.
Best Acts – 3 Daft Monkeys / Hobo Jones & The Junkyard Dogs / The Runners
Other Highlights – Beards, Beards & Beards
Low Points – The toilet man’s broken arm
Tort’s Festival Rating 8/10
6 – WOMAD. Second year at Charlton Park & completely reorganised after last year’s mudbath.
Best Acts – Shantel & Bukovina Club / Devon Sproule / Sa Dingding
Other Highlights – £10 for a Wedding Dress!
Low Points – No Club WOMAD
Tort’s Festival Rating 7.5/10
7 – Endorse It In Dorset. Didn’t quite come up to scratch with last year’s superb festival but the site held up well after a complete washout Saturday.
Best Acts – Subgiant / Splitters / Fat Drunk & Stupid
Other Highlights – Return of Punk Karaoke
Low Points – Brew Crew neighbours
Tort’s Festival Rating 7.5/10
8 – Love Box. Only went for the Sunday but was pleasantly surprised at the chilled atmosphere for a city centre festival.
Best Acts – Flaming Lips / Think Of One / Dandy Warhols
Other Highlights – Woody Bop Muddy’s Record Graveyard
Low Points – Poor choice at the bars
Tort’s Festival Rating 7/10
9 – Musicport. Moved down the coast to Bridlington from its traditional home at Whitby. Great new venue but didn’t attract the numbers they were probably hoping for.
Best Acts – Toumani Diabate / Skavolution / Rolf Harris
Other Highlights – Cloudbase & Musicporter
Low Points – The food was rubbish & it ain’t Whitby
Tort’s Festival Rating 7/10
10 – Festinho. Otherwise known as “Mini Chill” this was right on my doorstep. More garden fete than festival at times but Saturday night was fun!
Best Acts – Blockheads / The Bays / The Sex Patels
Other Highlights – Beautiful setting & being able to pop home for a shower
Low Points – Poor bar & power problems at the Disco Shed
Tort’s Festival Rating 6.5/10
11 – Wychwood – Our second choice after escaping from Sunrise Celebration, held at Cheltenham Racecourse for the Pimms set & their crocs shod kids
Best Acts – Dengue Fever / Dreadzone / Imagined Village
Other Highlights – Frozen Margaritas & Stagefright Bitter
Low Points – Bloody Camping Chairs!!!
Tort’s Festival Rating 6/10
12 – Big Chill. Only went because we got to cash in our cheaper Sunrise Celebration tickets. It’s a lot BIGGER than I imagined. Far too commercial for my tastes too!
Best Acts – Leonard Cohen / Peatbog Faeries / Jilted John
Other Highlights – Another stunning setting! Top mates
Low Points – Too expensive / Moody security / Overflowing loos
Tort’s Festival Rating 6/10
13 – Strawberry Fair. First time I’ve been for a couple of years and enjoyed it more than my last visit but very overcrowded and there wasn’t really a huge amount going on to get excited about.
Best Acts – Tragic Roundabout / AOS3
Other Highlights – It’s Free!
Low Points – Too many people!
Tort’s Festival Rating 5/10
14 – Sunrise Celebration. We arrived. It rained. We left (eventually).
Best Acts – There weren’t any.
Other Highlights – The 2 hours of sunshine when we first got there.
Low Points – Queuing 3 hours for a tow out on the Friday morning.
Tort’s Festival Rating 1/10
http://www.pbase.com/tort/festivals
<Opens Envelope>
1 – Glastonbury. Bottom of the pile last year, Glasto stormed back to form with some great new attractions, loads more late night stuff and generally a much better atmosphere all round.
Best Acts – Bison / Balkan Beat Box / Tunng
Other Highlights – Trash City / Shangri La / Flagtopia
Low Points – The return of the tent thieves
Tort’s Festival Rating 9.5/10
2 – Knockengorroch World Ceilidh. A full 4 dayer this time to celebrate this being the 20th “Knocky” and a romantic return to the place Strange-Fish & I first got it together.
Best Acts – Orkestra Del Sol / Shlomo / Daevid Allen
Other Highlights – An extra day in paradise
Low Points – Midges
Tort’s Festival Rating 9/10
3 – Solfest. Retained its Top 3 ranking this year despite soggy ground conditions causing problems with the build. We were able to get onsite on Thursday for the first time.
Best Acts – Bad Manners / Misty’s Big Adventure / Alabama 3
Other Highlights – Fancy Dress, Tequila Sunrises & the Saturday Night Fever dancefloor
Low Points – Traffic queues for those arriving Friday
Tort’s Festival Rating 8.5/10
4 – Beatherder. We were only there for one night but it had us itching for more. Lots of mad stuff in the trees with Pendle Hill as a brooding backdrop.
Best Acts – Lancashire Hotpots / Acid Faerie Brass Band / Grinny Grandad
Other Highlights – The Working Men’s Club & dancing in the woods
Low Points – Slippery underfoot
Tort’s Festival Rating 8/10
5 – Bearded Theory. Brand new, tiny, the first of the season and only £12 for a ticket. Bargain of the summer.
Best Acts – 3 Daft Monkeys / Hobo Jones & The Junkyard Dogs / The Runners
Other Highlights – Beards, Beards & Beards
Low Points – The toilet man’s broken arm
Tort’s Festival Rating 8/10
6 – WOMAD. Second year at Charlton Park & completely reorganised after last year’s mudbath.
Best Acts – Shantel & Bukovina Club / Devon Sproule / Sa Dingding
Other Highlights – £10 for a Wedding Dress!
Low Points – No Club WOMAD
Tort’s Festival Rating 7.5/10
7 – Endorse It In Dorset. Didn’t quite come up to scratch with last year’s superb festival but the site held up well after a complete washout Saturday.
Best Acts – Subgiant / Splitters / Fat Drunk & Stupid
Other Highlights – Return of Punk Karaoke
Low Points – Brew Crew neighbours
Tort’s Festival Rating 7.5/10
8 – Love Box. Only went for the Sunday but was pleasantly surprised at the chilled atmosphere for a city centre festival.
Best Acts – Flaming Lips / Think Of One / Dandy Warhols
Other Highlights – Woody Bop Muddy’s Record Graveyard
Low Points – Poor choice at the bars
Tort’s Festival Rating 7/10
9 – Musicport. Moved down the coast to Bridlington from its traditional home at Whitby. Great new venue but didn’t attract the numbers they were probably hoping for.
Best Acts – Toumani Diabate / Skavolution / Rolf Harris
Other Highlights – Cloudbase & Musicporter
Low Points – The food was rubbish & it ain’t Whitby
Tort’s Festival Rating 7/10
10 – Festinho. Otherwise known as “Mini Chill” this was right on my doorstep. More garden fete than festival at times but Saturday night was fun!
Best Acts – Blockheads / The Bays / The Sex Patels
Other Highlights – Beautiful setting & being able to pop home for a shower
Low Points – Poor bar & power problems at the Disco Shed
Tort’s Festival Rating 6.5/10
11 – Wychwood – Our second choice after escaping from Sunrise Celebration, held at Cheltenham Racecourse for the Pimms set & their crocs shod kids
Best Acts – Dengue Fever / Dreadzone / Imagined Village
Other Highlights – Frozen Margaritas & Stagefright Bitter
Low Points – Bloody Camping Chairs!!!
Tort’s Festival Rating 6/10
12 – Big Chill. Only went because we got to cash in our cheaper Sunrise Celebration tickets. It’s a lot BIGGER than I imagined. Far too commercial for my tastes too!
Best Acts – Leonard Cohen / Peatbog Faeries / Jilted John
Other Highlights – Another stunning setting! Top mates
Low Points – Too expensive / Moody security / Overflowing loos
Tort’s Festival Rating 6/10
13 – Strawberry Fair. First time I’ve been for a couple of years and enjoyed it more than my last visit but very overcrowded and there wasn’t really a huge amount going on to get excited about.
Best Acts – Tragic Roundabout / AOS3
Other Highlights – It’s Free!
Low Points – Too many people!
Tort’s Festival Rating 5/10
14 – Sunrise Celebration. We arrived. It rained. We left (eventually).
Best Acts – There weren’t any.
Other Highlights – The 2 hours of sunshine when we first got there.
Low Points – Queuing 3 hours for a tow out on the Friday morning.
Tort’s Festival Rating 1/10
http://www.pbase.com/tort/festivals
