Pushy parents acting as "agents" for their kids' uni applications

[Miss-Shelf]

I'm really proud of my 16 year old and what she can do for herself - one of her male friends sits in our kitchen saying '*****'s' really good at cooking and cleaning and I can't do any of it - like its a great big mystery
mind you this is the same friend who lurks outside my flat window having a not so sneaky spliff

she contacted all of her A'level colleges herself and got the forms and told me when the open days were and organised her year head to sign them and got me to sign them. I did put them in the post box...i thought that was really great for her to do for herself

ps helicpter parents? why?

 

[pogofish]

I have noticed that all the people on my list are blokes, and maybe its just in my experience, but you don't seem to get females who display the astounding levels of fecklessness present in these unfortunates. There might possibly be an underlying question about gender roles in my genaration, but I'm not sure if I can weed it out in an eloquent and non-insulting fashion.

Nah, there are plenty of females who can be just as bad IME.

 

[zippyRN]

I see a related aspect of helpless students through letting some houses out to Uni students. We've had them on the phone demanding that we come round (or send an electrician!) to change a lightbulb!.

given some social housing providers require you to inform them of a blown lightbulb and they make it a term of their tenancies that *ALL* electrical repairs are undertaken by their approved electricians , this is not actually as daft as it might first sound.

afew years ago a friend through the TA was an apprentice spraky for a big contractors and they used to spend a day a week going and doing daft stuff like changing lightbulbs in local social housing - becasue several of the ALMOs and HAs had made the above decision.

 

[LadyLDN]

I work at a uni, this is a well-known phenomena, they're referred to as 'helicopter parents'

Can't believe I've only just seen this thread... I've never heard that term before - I work at a Uni too

The Uni Open Evenings are usually where parents are out in force... it can be sweet at times, as they're usually having a panic about their "baby" leaving home etc... there are occasions (like at the last OE I did this month) where the applicants want to tell their parents to "shut up!" as they'd quite like to do the talking for themselves...

 

[Cloo]

This is just made of wrong! For me, about 90% of the point of university was the whole being independent and managing your own bloody life. People who use their parents to speak for them for university ought to be rejected for clearly not being ready to go to one!

Although some allowances should be made for perfectly capable students who just have over-protective parents.

 

[pinkmonkey]

I remember a mate of mine interviewing somene for a graduate design job and he showed up with his parents. In his portfolio were also included his swimming badges that he'd got as a ten year old. When I was at uni the two most hopeless cases were someone who got scurvy because he lived on pot noodle and another who posted his laundry to his mother on a weekly basis and she would post the clean laundry back.

 

[Treacle Toes]

If they can't handle a uni application and interview themselve they are clearly not ready for uni.

 

[Combustible]

Allowing parents to act on behalf of their children through UCAS has some obvious valid uses. Particularly when they are applying in a 'gap year' and may be away doing something and not be in a position to manage their application.

 

[Nemo]

ps helicpter parents? why?

Because they hover.

I agree in general though, it's a bad idea. I deliberately made sure to go away from home when I went to university precisely because I thought I'd benefit from the experience of having to fend for myself. I also sorted pretty much everything apart from transporting all my gear without my parents' help. I'm sure they would have helped if I'd asked, but one has to start living one's own life. I think I'd die if my parents came with me to job interviews though - who seriously thinks that's a good idea? I'll wager it leaves a lot of unemployed graduates with ever more pushy and anxious parents.