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Pretend ASBO

Edie

Well-Known Member
I’ll tell you what makes me really fucking angry are the adults involved in this shit. Kids will be kids and especially young lads it’s all about your reputation, looking hard etc. But the adults who take advantage of that, even if that’s just by being fuckin wastemen and hanging out or dealing a bit of smoke like my neighbours son in his early 20s ffs, let alone the much older ones in cars. They enrage me. I seriously want to go out there and confront the fucking pieces of shit and go wtf are you doing with a 14yo or 15yo in your car?! Get away from my house, don’t come near my son. Proper mother rage.
 

Rutita1

Council Estate Socialist
Edie, regarding those pics...those two may or may not be involved with gang activity in the larger sense. The whole hardman, hand signs pics are a pretty common example of the macho bravado that young men especially get into. Gangs can though start with a few good mates getting into criminal activity together and then plugging into other networks or similar.

That said, they are excluded from school and are more likely to be getting involved with day to day nonsense. spanglechick pointed out, the taking over of the vulnerable person's flat is a real example of 'cuckooing' and a well known gang tactic.

Have you spoken to your boy about the balaclava?

The older guys sound like a worry tbh. I fucking hate adults that do this.
 

Edie

Well-Known Member
I’ve not had the conversation (row) about the balaclava yet because we are all so utterly knackered at the end of term it would just kick off straight away. Thought I’d wait til school was finished.
 

Saul Goodman

It's all good, man
Banned
Anyone know anything about gangs? I was cleaning yesterday and found a balaclava in my eldests room. I’m pretty sure this is all just for show shite. But I looked up some of his mates fb (he doesn’t have fb anymore just insta and snap). These are two of my eldests mates (not best mates but kids that have hung out here and across the street, the kid at the bottom I’ve known since he was 3, lives three doors up). Both pics liked by my eldest. I’m worried about the hand sign? I’ve tried to protect their anonymity (although the pics are just online anyway).
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A lot of gang stuff is just for show. Including stabbing someone to show your mates how hard you are.
 

Edie

Well-Known Member
Everything glamorises the gang lifestyle. All the music they listen to, the clothes they wear (givency fucking sliders I’m looking at you), the way they talk. And I’m certain that almost all of it is front, that it’s just how it is being a lad that age in the city. But it does my head in. My boys mates are actually nice lads, they say hullo and goodbye, they are polite and respectful, really nice lads. But close the bedroom door and the music goes on or out they all troop with their overpriced clothes and brand new attitude and there is just a bit of me which worries. Five of their mates got killed in a stolen car last summer, three others have been done for burglary. You just have to pray it’s not your boy. The good thing is the last year he *has* been really sensible, no more exclusions, not staying out, not a single bit of trouble with the police (and I don’t count the fake ASBO). So I think you just have to trust in yourself and your kid.
 

ice-is-forming

Well-Known Member
Wow :( five killed...thats awful. I can imagine you're worried. For some absolutely absurd reason /luck/whatever... My three boys (29, 25 and 24) sort of managed to steer clear of gangs. The eldest was a bit of trouble but always had common sense and good values to balance it out.

Having worked as a youth worker for many years, I'd really suggest picking your battles. It's been my experience that the more you give a young person to kick against the harder they will kick.
 

Saul Goodman

It's all good, man
Banned
And your ACTUAL experience has led you to compare teenage lads being polite to their mates mum to the Kray brothers. Right.
No, it made me realise that being polite and being a gangster aren't mutually exclusive. Something you appear to be at odds with.
 

Edie

Well-Known Member
Wow :( five killed...thats awful. I can imagine you're worried. For some absolutely absurd reason /luck/whatever... My three boys (29, 25 and 24) sort of managed to steer clear of gangs. The eldest was a bit of trouble but always had common sense and good values to balance it out.

Having worked as a youth worker for many years, I'd really suggest picking your battles. It's been my experience that the more you give a young person to kick against the harder they will kick.
ice-is-forming it was dreadful
Who were the five killed in the Leeds car crash, where is Meanwood and what's the latest?
 

Edie

Well-Known Member
No, it made me realise that being polite and being a gangster aren't mutually exclusive. Something you appear to be at odds with.
I’ve no opinion on whether organised crime gang members from the 1960s in London who tortured people were polite. I don’t give a shit.

As a mum though I can spot a good lad from a bad example. Stuff like do they go to school, do their mums care where they are, do they have aspirations, are they respectful. This stuffs important.
 

ice-is-forming

Well-Known Member
Oh that's just awful :( I don't know if it's a generational thing or not, and not being in the UK can't make a proper guess based on my experience. But I often feel that there was a moment in time when life for young people changed beyond anything we'd experienced or seen before...and I feel blessed that my kids just seemed to have not been apart of this. But only just... It must be so hard Edie x
 

Saul Goodman

It's all good, man
Banned
I’ve no opinion on whether organised crime gang members from the 1960s in London who tortured people were polite. I don’t give a shit.

As a mum though I can spot a good lad from a bad example. Stuff like do they go to school, do their mums care where they are, do they have aspirations, are they respectful. This stuffs important.
I went to school. My mother cared where I was. I had aspirations... But I was still a cunt. :thumbs:
 

Saul Goodman

It's all good, man
Banned
I’ve no opinion on whether organised crime gang members from the 1960s in London who tortured people were polite. I don’t give a shit.

As a mum though I can spot a good lad from a bad example. Stuff like do they go to school, do their mums care where they are, do they have aspirations, are they respectful. This stuffs important.
And this bit is absolute nonsense! Mothers (parents) are the least likely people on the planet to know what their (or other people's) kids are up to. And the first to believe their child would do no wrong.
 

Saul Goodman

It's all good, man
Banned
Are you absolutely 100% sure for certain that your contributions are helpful? For certain?
I'm absolutely sure that telling the truth is more helpful than not telling the truth.
If all people want is an ego-stroking session, that's fine, but it isn't going to fix anything.
 

Rutita1

Council Estate Socialist
And this bit is absolute nonsense! Mothers (parents) are the least likely people on the planet to know what their (or other people's) kids are up to. And the first to believe their child would do no wrong.
Oh give over. Sure some are blind to this stuff but the majority aren't. Edie having faith in her kid doesn't make her dumb or mean she's got her head in the sand. Anything being possible doesn't mean it's actually happening afterall.
 

ice-is-forming

Well-Known Member
And this bit is absolute nonsense! Mothers (parents) are the least likely people on the planet to know what their (or other people's) kids are up to. And the first to believe their child would do no wrong.
Your wrong in this, maybe your just generalising based on your own experiences. But in mine and many other situations I know of your take on it doesn't fit, as inconvenient as that may be...
 
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