Napkin etiquette

[Looby]

I've noticed people don't really put them on their laps much any more. Anyone else?

 

[seeformiles]

Sure one should tuck the piece of tablecloth nearest oneself into one's collar?

 

[perplexis]

If there's a napkin or serviette at the table then I will always put it on my lap, otherwise it gets in the way. I'm not sure how you can fail to do this. Does your MiL not fold them into 3D structures that would otherwise prevent plates from being put down? OTOH, if there isn't one I usually couldn't give a toss, unless I am about to eat something extremely messy or with my fingers.

 

[ovaltina]

Napkins are a great idea if you're as clumsy as me, but I grew up usually eating off a tray in front of the telly, so never used them.

 

[danny la rouge]

i have to agree that folding a napkin after use is very plebby. one should, at the end of the meal, place it approximately where your side plate was - just in the loosely gathered formation from which it left your hand -

Yup. This is so the staff can tell if they need laundered or not.

 

[subversplat]

you'll be telling us next she uses a knife to slice her bread roll in twain.

Isn't etiquette here to use a bread knife to cut into the bread roll just slightly too far and make a nasty nick in that little bit of skin between the thumb and forefinger?

 

[cesare]

Cloth napkin or paper serviette ... either go on lap. Neither of them tend to come out day to day unless it's really messy food - then it'll usually be a serviette (from stocks swiped from fast food places e.g. Pret, or left over Christmas ones, or kitchen roll equiv).

I like a tablecloth and napkins though, tends to be Christmas only most of the time sadly. Should make more effort.

 

[Madusa]

I never put napkins on my lap. I just leave it on the table so i can put the offcuts into it.

 

[geminisnake]

I upset her by not folding mine afterwards the other day as well. *slap on wrist*

You might want to google napkin etiquette for her. As others have said you are NOT meant to fold a napkin after use. There is a valid reason for this, iirc it is so the staff can tell it has been used.

How does she leave her cutlery??
How many glasses does she put out on the table??

If someone was going to be picky with me about table manners I would be jogging my memories(dad taught me all the 'proper' way of doing things years ago) and making SURE I did it 'properly'

I'd love you to take my son round there for a meal, he'd mortify her Despite my best efforts he has bad table manners.

 

[untethered]

How To Get On In Society by John Betjeman

Phone for the fish knives, Norman
As cook is a little unnerved;
You kiddies have crumpled the serviettes
And I must have things daintily served.

Are the requisites all in the toilet?
The frills round the cutlets can wait
Till the girl has replenished the cruets
And switched on the logs in the grate.

It's ever so close in the lounge dear,
But the vestibule's comfy for tea
And Howard is riding on horseback
So do come and take some with me

Now here is a fork for your pastries
And do use the couch for your feet;
I know that I wanted to ask you-
Is trifle sufficient for sweet?

Milk and then just as it comes dear?
I'm afraid the preserve's full of stones;
Beg pardon, I'm soiling the doileys
With afternoon tea-cakes and scones.

 

[moose]

Then they're napkins

No they're not. I can't find any reputable source that says serviettes are paper and napkins are cloth. Both are derived from French words, and they are interchangeable. Except I probably wouldn't use the word 'napkin' because most of the people I work with would assume I'm talking about a sanitary towel.

 

[AnnO'Neemus]

No they're not. I can't find any reputable source that says serviettes are paper and napkins are cloth. Both are derived from French words, and they are interchangeable. Except I probably wouldn't use the word 'napkin' because most of the people I work with would assume I'm talking about a sanitary towel.

Americans?

 

[AnnO'Neemus]

Cloth napkin or paper serviette ... either go on lap. Neither of them tend to come out day to day unless it's really messy food - then it'll usually be a serviette (from stocks swiped from fast food places e.g. Pret, or left over Christmas ones, or kitchen roll equiv).

I like a tablecloth and napkins though, tends to be Christmas only most of the time sadly. Should make more effort.

^This.

Although I don't really do Christmas. But they come out occasionally for random dinner parties.

 

[quimcunx]

Of course they do. I went for pizza yesterday and had three spillages onto my lap - luckily I had a serviette to catch them or I would have had to walk around with stains on my jeans for the rest of the day.

and I've just dropped lots of white chocolate on to my lap

((((cleavageless women))))



I think the serviette thing came in in the 70s. Meant to be trying to be posh but actually serviette is non u.

 

[rioted]

What's wrong with just using your shirt sleeve?

Too right.

And if it's "messy finger food" suck 'em.

 

[weepiper]

I grew up in a house where napkins were pretty much unheard of, so the first few times I ate at my ex's mum's house were a bit of an eye-opener - they each had their own monogrammed silver napkin ring

 

[untethered]

I grew up in a house where napkins were pretty much unheard of, so the first few times I ate at my ex's mum's house were a bit of an eye-opener - they each had their own monogrammed silver napkin ring

Don't worry, they probably had to buy them.

 

[Rainingstairs]

hmmm, formal meals: napkin on your lap when seated, on your chair when you're off to the loo, and on the table when your done. Casual meals: who cares where it is but it's not without any purpose at all imo. Maybe it's just me but, I don't like the feel of water on the corners of my mouth after I take a sip and sometimes that just happens.

wow. lol, that's prolly the most I'll ever say on the subject. ever again.

 

[hovis]

kitchen roll it's called

essential

 

[TopCat]

Nancy Mitford should not be relied upon for matters of taste.

 

[ShakespearO]

We always use paper napkins brought home in bulk (along with brown sugar sachets) from cafes and restaurants.

 

[Vintage Paw]

We do have some which come out at Christmas...if I remember

Never used them as a kid, napkins (which are cloth, of course, serviettes are paper ) were only ever seen in restaurants and on special occasions.

On the lap for me, thought I don't see anything wrong in tucking them in like a bib!

Tbh if we are eating mesy food we are more likely to just grab a roll of kitchen paper and use that

This. All of it.

 

[danny la rouge]

Napkin Etiquette is my favourite Damned album, mind.