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london's worst clubs

Broadway Boulevard, Ealing. How the **** I ended up in here for an R&B night ffs I will not know. Likewise, how I got out without being stabbed I also do not know. Not everyone was so lucky. Full of silver chain-wearing wannabe gangsta scum from everywhere from Harrow to... er... Ealing, I guess :rolleyes:

Eros, Enfield. Put on a few decent garage nights at one time, sadly spoiled by idiots who proved that, in their case at least, IQ was definitely directly proportional to the frequency of the basslines. The kind of place where, if you've been turned away, you come back "strapped" a few minutes later, and "cap" the doorman. Sadly, this really did happen a few times :mad:

Fortunately, I don't go to places like this very often :)
 

TitanSound

Mr Beardy Drummer
Eros, Enfield. Put on a few decent garage nights at one time, sadly spoiled by idiots who proved that, in their case at least, IQ was definitely directly proportional to the frequency of the basslines. The kind of place where, if you've been turned away, you come back "strapped" a few minutes later, and "cap" the doorman. Sadly, this really did happen a few times :mad:
I foolishly visited this venue a couple of times as mates said "the girls were buff!!!!". The girls were indeed buff, but hard to talk to unless you had a Versace shirt and shiny shoes on. No chance for scruffy old me in my Levi's and scuffed up Gazelle's.
 

Belushi

01 811 8055
R.I.P.
Flami gos in Woolwich. Its actual name was Flamingos but the n was missing from the sign during the years I lived there.

Great place to grab a granny or get a beating.
 

The Octagon

Stop...Hammertime
Broadway Boulevard, Ealing. How the **** I ended up in here for an R&B night ffs I will not know. Likewise, how I got out without being stabbed I also do not know. Not everyone was so lucky. Full of silver chain-wearing wannabe gangsta scum from everywhere from Harrow to... er... Ealing, I guess :rolleyes:

Eros, Enfield. Put on a few decent garage nights at one time, sadly spoiled by idiots who proved that, in their case at least, IQ was definitely directly proportional to the frequency of the basslines. The kind of place where, if you've been turned away, you come back "strapped" a few minutes later, and "cap" the doorman. Sadly, this really did happen a few times :mad:

Fortunately, I don't go to places like this very often :)
Been to both of those.

Agree on both points.
 

paolo

Well-Known Member
There was a place on the Hendon Way, near Hendon Central tube. I forget the name. It was above a restaurant and seemed to be entirely populated by teenagers. Me and my mate kinda vaguely knew it was a bit crap, but didn't know the full horror until we got inside. It was a school disco with booze. Awful. Suffice to say we never went back.

Then there were those 'barns' in Kilburn. The National. The Galtymore. Irish fighting clubs. Mental. Not good mental, bad mental. People stripped to the waist rucking, whilst waiting for taxis. I assume they've all disappeared now but I've not gone back to check.
 

TitanSound

Mr Beardy Drummer
Then there were those 'barns' in Kilburn. The National. The Galtymore. Irish fighting clubs. Mental. Not good mental, bad mental. People stripped to the waist rucking, whilst waiting for taxis. I assume they've all disappeared now but I've not gone back to check.
The National has been a "church" for about 10 years now.
 

Greebo

'scuse me, Mrs May, can I have my country back?
R.I.P.
Whatever Exodus aka Kudos aka Paradise Lost currently calls itself. The crappy nightclub in Watford which half of Essex thought was worth going to. Strange, because locals thought it was a bit of a provincial dump.
 

baffled

Well-Known Member
There was a place on the Hendon Way, near Hendon Central tube. I forget the name. It was above a restaurant and seemed to be entirely populated by teenagers. Me and my mate kinda vaguely knew it was a bit crap, but didn't know the full horror until we got inside. It was a school disco with booze. Awful. Suffice to say we never went back.

Then there were those 'barns' in Kilburn. The National. The Galtymore. Irish fighting clubs. Mental. Not good mental, bad mental. People stripped to the waist rucking, whilst waiting for taxis. I assume they've all disappeared now but I've not gone back to check.
Melanies of Hendon, went a couple of times as it was open after Production Village kicked out and you're right it was crap, The National, Galtymore and Ashtons are all gone, literally in the case of the latter 2 (The National is a church now, UCKG I think)
 

clicker

nanook rubs it....
Twilights in Stydenham....the home of the works Christmas do....pissed up aging accountants, the smell of roast meat languishing in its own fat under a buffet light and watered down all inclusive drinks....never had Black Russians been so un-Russian .
 

MellySingsDoom

Decimated by the shrapnel of his rhetoric
:D



bit of a londoncentric thread this - these OP clubbing/media types eh? ;)
Oh fucking hell - I've been unfortunate enough to have been to this place in the very early 90's. One small room of soul and funk was it's only saving grace. Mirrored walls. Ghastly late 80's music of 2nd division SAW acts heritage. Pissed up beer monsters all over the shop. "Smart dress only". The inevitable "are you looking at my bird/pint/shoes etc" characters....
 

paolo

Well-Known Member
Melanies of Hendon, went a couple of times as it was open after Production Village kicked out and you're right it was crap, The National, Galtymore and Ashtons are all gone, literally in the case of the latter 2 (The National is a church now, UCKG I think)
Ah yes, the Production Village, Ashtons! All the awful memories... coming flooding back.
 
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