London independence: 2017

Discussion in 'London and the South East' started by Hollis, Aug 26, 2017.

  1. Hollis

    Hollis bloody furious

    I came across this old thread from 2006:

    A compelling 50+ % of the urbanariat vote for London independence! :)

    I'm surprised more hasn't more hasn't been made of it post-referendum. I can only assume because both political parties don't know their arse from their elbow on the whole issue.

    Take this graphic, and wikipedia link. Metropolitan London with a population of 13.8m would form the 9th largest country in the EU block..

    Could we envisage a scenario where a strident and independent London breaks away from the rest of the UK?

    :confused: :hmm:

    List of European Union member states by population - Wikipedia

    Smaller countries .png
  2. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    I expect plenty of people in the UK would welcome London leaving, given how it distorts everything. The assets that are based there would have to be divvied up though - so things like the national museums collections would be distributed across the UK. You can keep the royal family mind.
  3. marty21

    marty21 One on one? You're crazy.

    You can take our assets from our cold dead hands :mad:
  4. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    'our' assets. :hmm:

    Fine. I take it you're happy to survive without water, electricity and food? We'd blockade the estuary by the way, so no sneaking stuff in by sea. :p
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2017
    marty21 and Celyn like this.
  5. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    Oh, and London would have to accept it's share of the radioactive stockpile currently stored at Sellafield. :cool:
    Celyn likes this.
  6. Puddy_Tat

    Puddy_Tat meh


    socialist feline republic of catford

    bromley, marty21, Miss-Shelf and 3 others like this.
  7. Hollis

    Hollis bloody furious

    Given most of the Royal Family's title's: the Prince of Wales, the Earl of Wessex, the Duke of Edinburgh, the Duke and Duchess of Cornwall... I think we'd have to give you most of them and just keep the Queen and Prince Harry. You could probably have Nicholas Witchell as well, given you're getting most of them.
    Last edited: Aug 26, 2017
  8. Celyn

    Celyn Well-Known Member

    And companies that have their head office, or UK head office, in London would move the head office to somewhere not-London.

    Does London have a lot of oil, gas, wind farms, agriculture, fisheries etc?
    farmerbarleymow likes this.
  9. Puddy_Tat

    Puddy_Tat meh

    bromley, maomao, marty21 and 4 others like this.
  10. friendofdorothy

    friendofdorothy it is so much worse than Thatcherism now

    will we need a wall?
  11. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    Why not - it would help keep London nicely contained like a prison, and prevent escapees.
    friendofdorothy likes this.
  12. ska invita

    ska invita back on the other side

    is there any precedent for this kind of thing within modern nation states?
  13. Yossarian

    Yossarian free shrugs

    Singapore breaking away from Malaysia might be a precedent, and they seem to have done OK.
  14. ViolentPanda

    ViolentPanda Hardly getting over it.

    No nuclear power stations in greater London, you goatcock! :p
  15. ViolentPanda

    ViolentPanda Hardly getting over it.

    Only between South London and North London, as the Thames won't keep 'em out!
    DietCokeGirl and friendofdorothy like this.
  16. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    But you've used the power generated by nuclear reactors in other parts of the country, so we'll deliver your share of the highly radioactive waste that was generated. You'll just have to find somewhere to store it.

    You could use it to build a nuclear power station to meet your energy demands though - as otherwise you'd be very reliant on the rest of the country supplying power, which could be cut off at any time. :p
    Celyn likes this.
  17. kabbes

    kabbes "A top 400 poster"

    How's London going to carry on producing without the million or so people that commute into it from elsewhere in the UK every day?
  18. DotCommunist

    DotCommunist my world is fire and blood

    they'll be eating their children in a matter of days
  19. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    And drinking their own piss.
  20. S☼I

    S☼I it's my room get out

    (((Southern beer)))
    marty21 and farmerbarleymow like this.
  21. EastEnder

    EastEnder Brixton Barnacle

    So if Scotland eventually gains independence, will they be chucking a big pile of the remaining oil our way, or keeping it all for themselves? hmmm? :hmm:

    If an independent London had to hand over half the cash to all the manky bits of the country, there'd be no point in leaving. Clearly London Independence should follow the same rules as Scottish Independence - we get to keep what we want, and just ditch the naff stuff we don't want - you can have Hoxton, it's full of wankers anyway. :cool:
  22. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    We'll have Hoxton and give you Skelmersdale and the Boro. Deal?
    sealion likes this.
  23. Artaxerxes

    Artaxerxes Well-Known Member

    The only way you get an independent London is if takes the lower half of the country with it as thats where most of the people that work in it live. At that point you may as well just take over the entire country again.
  24. EastEnder

    EastEnder Brixton Barnacle

    No that's fine, no payment in return is required - consider it a gift!
  25. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    Nice try! :D
    EastEnder likes this.
  26. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    We'll also have to send London's share of industrial waste more generally - Hyde Park and Hampstead Heath would be perfect for storage of colliery waste, and perhaps Trafalgar Square could be filled with slag from the various steel works across the country - it would turn it into an adventure playground for the tourists.
  27. EastEnder

    EastEnder Brixton Barnacle

    Fair enough, and while we're on the subject of unwanted waste - London has more than its fair share of over-privileged, wankfest celebs, it's only fair that the provincial, cousin marrying backwaters get saddled with their quota. You can have Katy Hopkins, Vanessa Feltz and Ant & Dec. :thumbs:
  28. Yossarian

    Yossarian free shrugs

    Speaking of unwanted waste, around 300 Conservative MPs will have to be sent back to the shires - I guess the polite thing to do would be to give them at least 48 hours to vacate their London residences before they are requisitioned to help ease the housing crisis.
    Maggot, Puddy_Tat and Hollis like this.
  29. farmerbarleymow

    farmerbarleymow cooking expert and general daft apeth

    I suspect most of them would emigrate rather than live in the desolate North where no-one would give a shit about them. :D

    It could be argued that London has generated this waste all by itself, with its up its own arse celebrity industry - hence why the no-marks gravitate to London in the first place.

    Vile Hopkins was born in Devon so she can sod off back there, rather than befoul the North. And Vanessa Feltz was born in London anyway.
    EastEnder likes this.
  30. ViolentPanda

    ViolentPanda Hardly getting over it.

    A lot of colliery spoil was "born" in the north, but that hasn't stopped you trying to palm it off on London, so you can fucking well take Feltz and like it!

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