Ophelia: 'Did these women consciously choose not to work after having children or do we live in a society that glorifies motherhood'
Perhaps both? I think I did all I could to persuade them to stay at work. It was certainly in my interests to. But although we paid very well they nearly all seemed to have husbands who were earning a lot more - I only remember one husband going part time to share the childcare. We did manage a job-share between 2 mums for a while. It worked pretty well, despite our demanding clients.
Ophelia: 'Again, I sense a "women have natural qualities which would make them inherently better at leading the world". To me, this is not feminism. This is sexism, under a different guise which sociologists have named "benevolent" sexism. Qualities like softness, selflessness and patience are valued and presented as exclusively feminine to the extent that it justifies men for not displaying such qualities and marginalise women who demonstrate any aggressiveness, self-centreness and impatience. Think of the way a non-feminine ambitious woman is often dismissed as a "selfish ruthless bitch". Think of how many did not consider Thatcher to be a woman. Not that I am condoning Thatcher's policies, hear me right. All I am saying is that these ideas are very powerful in discouraging women from what our society and culture portray as "naturally" feminine behaviour. And lately, under the guise of progressiveness and feminism, some, like you, advance that maybe since men have made such a mess of things, maybe women should have a go at running the show for a while. They've never done it in any substantial way (apart from isolated matriarchal societies which the patriarchal west has very little interest in knowing about) and who knows, their 'natural' feminine qualities may turn things round. I don't think so. I don't think women, like any other section of society, have "inherent" qualities.'
Re matriarchies - I misused the term. What I meant was a govt/parliament where women are in the majority. (Is there a term for that?) As far as I know this has only happened once, for a brief period in Sweden in the '70s. It's about to happen in Rwanda.
I don't think I'm guilty of 'benevolent sexism'. Nearly every boss I've had has been a woman, so I think I'm fairly realistic about the differences between the genders. Perhaps we'll have to agree to differ on the inherent qualities of men cf. women because I'm absolutely certain that a government dominated by women would have different qualities to one dominated by men. I don't know if a cabinet of 'alpha females' would be better for the country than one of alpha males...but it would certainly be different, and I think it's high time we tried it, not just for the sake of better rights for women but for the sake of everyone in the community, men and women.
I want to reply to all your other points but I think I need a nap now!
