is anyone writing a book out there?

[Donna Ferentes]

Rarely.

 

[Error Gorilla]

I'm sure I'll fail to buck the trend.

 

[Donna Ferentes]

Well, if you avoid hyperbole, namedropping and shoddy writing you'll be doing better than 99% in the field. Mind you, you won't get published.

 

[upsidedownwalrus]

I enjoyed "Come As You Are", the Nirvana book. I thought it was a good read. Mind you at the time I was a Nirvana-obsessive teen so I guess I was a tad biased.

 

[Cheesypoof]

yeh. me and my mate are doing one for which a deal is very probable. we start in summer. Its a comedy and a real shocker. We'll be in big trouble.

I have two other books on the cards - one is a kids one, which i will start next year once the first ones done. I have to read lots of disney classics first cos they are my targets, as its a traditional cartoony one.

Another is a series of teenage embarassments and experiences. Excerpts of which appear below. Enjoy x


1.
Put a load of words, countries and cartoon pics onto a blank canvas, and mix and muddle em like that cher scene in that mermaid film - not the splash one. The bit where she pokes a random spot on the map of the states, blindfolded. That’s how God made the world. His eyes twinkled, as he sat up with a sigh, smilingly knowingly, at the randomness of it all…


2.
Gazing out into the sunset, he imagined his own knighthood, a quivering mass of naked white virgins and a collage of flutes blasting out classical virtues with choir and orchestra. Tassles on the rims of some of the nipples. A stately affair, indeed. Arise now sir Muller, arise….


3.
He awoke with a painful shudder. Mother was jabbing him with her index finger. Prodding him repeatedly on the shoulder. Get up and get rid of this! She cried. He trembled, his Nuts collection had been found, pages stuck together. The worst tabloid tale of a thousand ablutions. Damn her, oh damn her! Pulling the covers over his head he trembled at her vigour, her eyes blazing in accusation, for a moment frozen in anger. It was a sign...

 

[Error Gorilla]

Well, if you avoid hyperbole, namedropping and shoddy writing you'll be doing better than 99% in the field. Mind you, you won't get published.

Jarvis Cocker said exactly the same thing to me the other day. Jarv's a genius, you know.

 

[Donna Ferentes]

Jarvis Cocker said exactly the same thing to me the other day. Jarv's a genius, you know.

You also need to say how you were there when it all started.

 

[Pete the Greek]

I'm trying to write more than one. I have a proposal with a couple of chess publishers and it still hasn't been definitively rejected. I'm also trying to write something about some events that happened half-a-dozen years ago. The hardest thing - I've had a book published before - is knuckling down and getting going.

In all seriousness, probably the best thing is not to go on discussion boards auntil it's done! I know I shouldn't.

Hear you loud and clear here....I'd do a lot better if I ripped out my WiFi card and stopped fucking around.

I've got my 80,000 words, but alot needs tightening and working on before it gets to the standard I need. I just need to get down to the nitty gritty and stop fucking around!

 

[Error Gorilla]

You also need to say how you were there when it all started.

Eh? Oh, well, yeah... of course. Mind you, back then everything was known as a singularity. Shortly after, it all kicked off big style man. Anthony H. Wilson created the universe, but he don't like to talk about it nowadays.