inexplicable movie cliches

[Santino]

That no one will both read and understand the OP.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

parking is generally never a problem in movie world, and they never buy parking tickets, or pay the congestion charge

...and no one ever locks a car door.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

Teenagers being stalked by serial killers split up to 'look around'.

Look around for what? Re-group and fuck off!

 

[Nanker Phelge]

Sad lonely losers who never get the girl always have a funny best friend who sleeps around a lot.

 

[T & P]

The first people to bite the dust in horror movies, will be the black people.

Not always

 

[T & P]

Oh, and when the main lead is fighting a gang of baddies who are trying to kill him, the baddies will patiently wait their turn to attack instead of ganging up on him.

 

[The Octagon]

Not always

Although they do in Scream 2 (although I think that was a deliberate nod to the convention).

 

[The Octagon]

Breaking a man's neck is portrayed as something you could accidentally do to a mate whilst larking about, rather than focusing on the tremendous upper body strength / technique required to do it quickly like Arnie.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

A black man amongst a group of white people is either very funny or very angry, unless you are Samuel L Jackson or Chris Rock, when you are both at the same time.

 

[AnnO'Neemus]

Women being hugged from behind while cooking will allways smile and turn for a kiss rather than telling you to fuck off.

you get it! why no one else?

But that's not inexplicable.

It's lovely if someone randomly and unexpectedly hugs you from behind, so why would you want to tell them to fuck off?

 

[DotCommunist]

That no one will both read and understand the OP.

except me

 

[DotCommunist]

But that's not inexplicable.

It's lovely if someone randomly and unexpectedly hugs you from behind, so why would you want to tell them to fuck off?

because you are cooking. Maybe I just know a lot of stressy cooks

 

[AnnO'Neemus]

[muzzle flashes] are pretty inexplicable cos they don't happen in real life.

I disagree.

When I witnessed a shooting outside my flat, when it was around midnight so very dark, I noticed two things:

Heard a bang.
Saw an orange muzzle flash.

So there.

 

[likesfish]

you get muzzle flashes at night or low light.
but not daylight unless you fireing something paitently silly like a desert eagle or a cut down g3.

hero/heroine have spent the last 40 minutes fighting or running for there lives reach a place of safety and decide to indulge in athletic sex

 

[Ted Striker]

Cars appear to have a chassis made out of pure dynamite

Baddies always hold on to the one piece of evidence (lock it away, natch) that will incriminate them

 

[DeepStoat]

The guy always gets the girl.

 

[DeepStoat]

A mysterious lack of bowel movements.

 

[Nanker Phelge]

New Yorks Streets become less congested when a car chase is taking place.

 

[Epico]

If you want to distroy a computer system, and the data it contains... smash up the monitor. That'll work.

 

[likesfish]

any sort of grenade or rocket launcher produces a massive fireball.
reloading is entirley optional as is aiming.

the kingdom has one of the charcters run around with a flatop m16 (its got a flatop so you can add sights to it) either the armourer was having a joke or the director was an idiot

 

[The Octagon]

The guy always gets the girl.

I was quite confused by the last Bond film (Quantum of Solace), because it didn't look like he slept with the main Bond girl, what's that about?

 

[Ted Striker]

Computers beep. On everything.

 

[Upchuck]

Cars can go over jumps, gaps in the road and land in a shower of sparks without fucking up the axles or getting a flat.

 

[DotCommunist]

I was quite confused by the last Bond film (Quantum of Solace), because it didn't look like he slept with the main Bond girl, what's that about?

New bond is a realistic low energy kinetic problem solver- the true state asset, emotionally retarded and fucking lethal

 

[T & P]

No one ever says goodbye in any form when ending a telephone conversation. Bloody rude if you ask me.

 

[DotCommunist]

If the pilot on a plane dies, there's always one passenger who flew in 'Nam

 

[Nanker Phelge]

No one ever says goodbye in any form when ending a telephone conversation. Bloody rude if you ask me.

All US phone numbers have the local code 555 no matter where they are.

 

[marty21]

...and no one ever locks a car door.

which makes it easy for car thieves

 

[Nanker Phelge]

which makes it easy for car thieves

But, car thieves in films only ever break in to locked cars.

So who's going around locking all the car doors when the actors have failed to do so?

 

[The Octagon]

Cars can go over jumps, gaps in the road and land in a shower of sparks without fucking up the axles or getting a flat.

Apart from in Road Trip