How to make your bike look shit (to deter thieves)

[Orang Utan]

i've got a chunky but cheap £25.00 lock. I don't think i could carry anything heavier around in my back-pack without putting it in the boot of a car.

How much does a £100 lock weigh ?

And how do you carry around a large, heavy fuck-off lock while perched on top of a bike?

genuine Q ....

My lock weighs the same as my bike but I've never ridden it without, so I don't know the difference

 

[Structaural]

i've got a chunky but cheap £25.00 lock. I don't think i could carry anything heavier around in my back-pack without putting it in the boot of a car.

How much does a £100 lock weigh ?

And how do you carry around a large, heavy fuck-off lock while perched on top of a bike?

genuine Q ....

erm - wrap it round the seat post? - if it's U-lock then it usually attaches to the frame.

 

[ChrisFilter]

i've got a chunky but cheap £25.00 lock. I don't think i could carry anything heavier around in my back-pack without putting it in the boot of a car.

How much does a £100 lock weigh ?

And how do you carry around a large, heavy fuck-off lock while perched on top of a bike?

genuine Q ....

You wear it like a belt. They're no heavier than cheaper locks.

 

[Orang Utan]

One of my pet hates is the amount of locks and chains that people leave in front of my work, instead of taking them home with them at night.

 

[Structaural]

My lock weighs the same as my bike but I've never ridden it without, so I don't know the difference

'weighs the same as my bike' *dreams*

Mine's a tank, it's alu but I've got to attach two big panniers and a child seat so I had to go for sturdy over light. I miss a light bike though.

 

[Orang Utan]

'weighs the same as my bike' *dreams*

Mine's a tank, it's alu but I've got to attach two big panniers and a child seat so I had to go for sturdy over light. I miss a light bike though.

A friend of mine has a bike that weighs less than his water bottle

 

[editor]

Of course there's the whole daftness of spending a fortune buying an ultra light back and then having to lug around a hefty lock wherever you go.

Fucking bastard bicycle thieves.

 

[Orang Utan]

They're not THAT heavy

 

[Structaural]

A friend of mine has a bike that weighs less than his water bottle

fuckinel!

 

[maximilian ping]

this sure is an excellent thread

for added 'uglifying' effect, and just in case the men in the van are watching, make sure that as you approach your parking spot you don't wizz around the corner and smoothly break. wobble around on the bike from side to side with bandy legs whilst continuously breaking and un-breaking. that, along with the ugly nature of the bike, will deffo fool them

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

Gordon Bennet, why so much hostility on this thread? It's quite clearly an idea for those who want a better running more expensive bike but have to leave it locked up outside for lengths of time. It's just an idea and not a bad one at that.

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

?

That still looks to me like a sweet ride.

 

[editor]

Gordon Bennet, why so much hostility on this thread? It's quite clearly an idea for those who want a better running more expensive bike but have to leave it locked up outside for lengths of time. It's just an idea and not a bad one at that.

Amen to that. Some of the posts in this thread sound like they've been written by an emo having a particularly bad day.

 

[maximilian ping]

Amen to that. Some of the posts in this thread sound like they've been written by an emo having a particularly bad day.

i think you've got a good point but herbsman also has. that's why its a a good thread - its a 'sign of the times' kind of thing

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

i think you've got a good point but herbsman also has. that's why its a a good thread - its a 'sign of the times' kind of thing

I'm not sure he has. I think he missed the point and his first post pretty much said it all.

Fair play if he doesn't want to fuck up his bike but the comment "why not just by a cheap shit shitty bike in the first place" shows that he just doesn't get it.
I have to do quite a large amount of cycling to get from home to work, a nice bike that cost a few hundred quid more would make a lot of difference and I personally don't give a shit what my bike looks like.

As it is I have a shit bike that looks OK and I have a place to park it at both ends but I can at least see what this thread was about instead of moaning "lame"
"what's Lame"
"lame means rubbish"
"ok why is it lame"
"because it is, it's really shit and you know it"
"?"
"Wahhhh, you have never understood me" *Slams door*

 

[corporate whore]

Taping is wise, IMO. If you spend a fat wedge on a decent bike it's not for the looks, it's for what you can get out of it.

 

[Agent Sparrow]

* Art it. You know about art cars? Art bike. Get some super glue and some plastic army men and go to town. Or get a can of spray glue, then go to your local barber and acquire a bag of hair. Spray the bike and sprinkle the hair. [committment level: SUPA HIGH]

I quite like the sound of this one

Might commission boohoo to get her hands on it.

 

[gentlegreen]

back-pack
how do you carry around a large, heavy fuck-off lock while perched on top of a bike?

You shouldn't be trying to cycle with stuff on your back. You wouldn't do it if you were running a half-marathon or playing football ....

Note D-Lock (and the cable in the basket).

Carrying a bigger one wouldn't be that much of a problem ...
.

 

[Herbsman.]

I'm not sure he has. I think he missed the point and his first post pretty much said it all.

Fair play if he doesn't want to fuck up his bike but the comment "why not just by a cheap shit shitty bike in the first place" shows that he just doesn't get it.

Thanks for mis-quoting me, you absolute prick, but what I actually said was:

Why waste money buying a bike that looks decent, then ruining it's appearance? Why not just buy a second hand bike that's unattractive in the first place?

I spend a lot of time at a bike shop that refurbishes old bikes, and brings them back into perfect working order. But you don't even need that kind of experience to know that a bike can look absolutely rubbish but ride like a dream.

I have to do quite a large amount of cycling to get from home to work, a nice bike that cost a few hundred quid more would make a lot of difference and I personally don't give a shit what my bike looks like.

So you actually think that because your bike is 'nice' and that it cost a few hundred quid, it must ride better than say, a second hand 1980's steel racer/hybrid that has been refurbed and costs £100 for example?

 

[Herbsman.]

A friend of mine has a bike that weighs less than his water bottle

Yeah, is that because it's an 8-litre water bottle?

 

[Final]

You shouldn't be trying to cycle with stuff on your back. You wouldn't do it if you were running a half-marathon or playing football ....

When you run then shock travels through your ankles and knees on impact (about 5 times your weight at half-marathon pace), so yeah, a backpack is going to fuck you up in hte long term.

I can't see why it'd be such a problem on a bike (assuming that the weight isn't so great as to cause a back injury).

 

[editor]

Thanks for mis-quoting me, you absolute prick, but what I actually said was:

I was hoping you might have calmed down, but it seems you're just as angry as last night again.

Chill out fella, else you'll explode!

 

[Herbsman.]

Not angry at all, thanks I just don't like being misquoted

 

[Orang Utan]

Yeah, is that because it's an 8-litre water bottle?

Nah, tis a fixed gear Condor bike

 

[Herbsman.]

Nah, tis a fixed gear Condor bike

But that weighs at least 8kg.... which is the weight of 8 litre of water

 

[Orang Utan]

But that weighs at least 8kg.... which is the weight of 8 litre of water

that's not how it feels to me - it feels like it weighs a lot less than 8kg I tell you

 

[gentlegreen]

I can't see why it'd be such a problem on a bike (assuming that the weight isn't so great as to cause a back injury).

It isn't just the damage to your back (I carry serious stuff on my bike) ... try to imagine Mike Hailwood with a rucksack ...

It's plain daft when you can fit a rack and a basket.

 

[Agent Sparrow]

It's plain daft when you can fit a rack and a basket.

Unfortunately not if you a) need to take a fair bit of stuff with you, and b) need to tramp up and down stairs with it all day. My backpack did take a bit of getting used to, but as long as the straps are tight, I've got used to the drag. I do worry a bit about my back on days where I do lots of cycling though.

 

[Herbsman.]

that's not how it feels to me - it feels like it weighs a lot less than 8kg I tell you

Weigh it and you'll see

I reckon it's an illusion of the mind, something to do with size and density. I know my bike is 9 kilos yet it feels much lighter than a 9 kilo box of paper.

 

[extra dry]

http://www.lockitt.com/chain6.htm you have to pay to keep it safe


....I should of got one of these for my first bike..nicked in broad daylight from my drive way...and twenty minutes later I see it being ridden along by a guy who started waving at me saying 'come on take it back....' I started running after him and then saw a handy pile of stones and pelted him with them..I lost my bike that day but I think that guy won't forget in a hurry...