Week 1 Manager1: We are promoting you Badgers: Good news, how much more cash to I get? Manager1: None for the first three months then performance based increase Badgers: That old chestnut eh? Okay, I will do it as I am a mug Manager1: Good, you start next week so handover your current work to ***** Badgers: Will I get a % pro-rata payment of the bonus I was working towards? Manager1: Yes Badgers: Cool Week 2 Badgers: All work handed over and new procedures written Manger2: Excellent work Badgers: I notice there was no bonus in my salary Manager2: Really? I will sort that at 10am tomorrow 10am: No word 12pm: No word 2pm: No word Next day: No word Badgers: What is happening with my bonus? Manger2: I have asked Manager1 to sort it Badgers: Thanks for letting me know at 10am Badgers: Can you finalise my bonus payment amount and date please? Manager1: You are not getting one Badgers: That is not what you said before Manager1: You misunderstood, bonus will only be paid on completed work Badgers: That is not what you said before Manager1: That is the company procedure Badgers: Show me where it says that and explain why you are going back on your word? Manager1: I am busy and that is the final word on the matter Badgers: (in open plan office) How the fuck did you become a manager? Manager1: I beg your pardon Badgers: Did you collect fucking crisp packets or something? Manager1: I want to see you with HR at 5pm. You can bring a witness That is how to do it!!