Great songs about football....

[Balbi]

When I had my loft
Converted back into a loft
The neighbours came around and scoffed
And called me retro

But they are the type
Who never used to go to the match
Until the family thing got big
In the late eighties

Dad’s a steward in the stand
Brace of comps in his hand

New men run a creche
While home defeats by Jeunesse D’Esch
In the Looks Familiar cup
Are rendered pointless

Stick a burger in my mouth
Shove a seat beneath my arse
Buy the shirt and shorts and socks
Win the keeper’s sweaty jocks
Point a gun down at your foot
Am I supposed to be at home?

Friday night and the gates are low
And it’s raining
Bastard slip of a sub’s ruined my weekend

So you came and went
‘Cos on crap three million was spent
And if Josh wants a five man tent
There must be forfeits

Star man said bye bye
And now you’re reaching for the sky
Sit back relax and watch us die
Of entertainment

Fiancee said that it was fun
Even though the others won
I can’t stand any more
‘Cos I can’t stand any more
You were blind but you will see
Tonight’s attendance one-two-three

Friday night and the gates are low
And it’s raining
Bastard slip of a sub’s ruined my weekend
Friday night and I just love complaining
And no I haven’t got anything better to do

 

[kained&able]

Was a sunny day in a Munich stadium
All the beer in Munich cant console them
As Oliver hit the turf
It was English footballs birth
It was there biggest loss since 1931

England 5 germany1
Michael Owen is number 1

Beckenbauer and Voller thought they d seen it all
Steven Michael Emile and golden balls
Running rings round you there was nothing
You could do England's glory
We changed the story
Now where pulling through

England 5 Germany 1
Michael Owen is no1

We got a Swede called Sven Gor Eriksson
Bobby Moor is now David Beckham
So Germany rip where the golden age to be our time has come
There on the run its time for victory

england 5 germany 1
michael owen is no1

dave

 

[stavros]

Half Man Half Biscuit - "All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit"

 

[Donna Ferentes]

Indeed

 

[stavros]

*note to self: read thread before posting*

John Peel's excellent "FabricLive" CD has as the intro the commentary from Alan Kennedy scoring the winner for Liverpool against Real Madrid in the 1981 European Cup final. Tenuous, but excellent.

 

[Silva]

Half Man Half Biscuit - "All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit"

Isn't it about Subbuteo?

 

[anchorage]

Wolverhampton Town

I'd been in exile for some years
And my eyes filled up with tears
When the Rangers came to
Wolverhampton Town

So I took a trip along
Just to hear some famous songs
When the Rangers came to
Wolverhampton Town

I stood there all alone
While the boys all down from home
Sang of Rangers, that team of great renown

And a sight I'd never seen,
When they sang
"God Save the Queen"
When the Rangers came to
Wolverhampton Town

[Chorus]
There's not a team like the Glasgow Rangers
One of the famous songs they sung
And a sight I'd never seen,
When they sang
"God Save the Queen"
When the Rangers came to
Wolverhampton Town

(Chorus)

Now the League Flag must come nearer
With men like Bobby Shearer
The way he played at
Wolverhampton Town
And Wolves forever after
Will sing of Jimmy Baxter
For on his head they placed a noble crown

(Chorus)

Now I knew it had to happen
I heard a mighty roar
The famous Glasgow Rangers
They had scored
And the sky was white and blue
Wolverhampton shook right through
The Royal Rampant Rangers had come through

(Chorus)

 

[anchorage]

Who's That Team?

Some people say that Real Madrid's
The greatest football team
I've even heard the Anderlecht
The best they've ever seen

There's Manchester United
And Tottenham Hotspur too
There's Arsenal, Chelsea Blackburn
Just to name a famous few

But who's that team they call the Rangers
Who's that team they all adore
They're the boys in royal blue
And they're Scotlands galant few
And they're out to show the world what they can do

So bring on the Hibs the Hearts the Celtic
Bring on Spaniards by the score
Barcelona, Real Madrid they will make a gallant bid
For we're out to show the world what we can do

So here's a health tae Glasgow Rangers,
Here's a health frae me tae you,
And let's hope that every game,
Will immortalize the name
Of the boys who wear,
The famous royal blue.

 

[anchorage]

The Famous Glasgow Rangers

As I was walking doon the Copland Road,
I met a bunch 'o' strangers,
They said to me, you going to see,
The famous Glasgow Rangers.
So I took them up to Ibrox Park,
To see the flags unfurl,
After that display they had to say
They're the champions of the world.

Some people they sing songs about
The land that they adore
And some of how they fought and won
Their countries greatest wars,
Some others still seem quite content
To use another theme,
But I can sing a song about
A famous football team

As I was walking doon the Copland Road,
I met a bunch 'o' strangers,
They said to me, you going to see,
The famous Glasgow Rangers.

 

[heinous seamus]

I'm not sure you've got the idea.

 

[anchorage]

Every Other Saturday

Every Other Seturday Is My Half Day Off, And It's Off To The Match I Go,
Happily We Wander Down The Paisley Road Me And My Wee Pal Joe,
We Love to See The Lassies With The Blue Scarfs On,
We Love To Hear The Boys All Roar,
But I Don't Have To Tell That The Best Of All,
We Love to See The Rangers Score,

Me Oh Me Oh Me Oh My - Oh How We Love To See Them try,
We Love to See The Lassies With The Blue Scarfs On,
We Love To Hear The Boys All Roar,
But I Don't Have To Tell You That The Best Of All,
We Love to See The Rangers Score,

We've Won The Scottish about a thousand times,
The Glasgow was a Simple do,
We Give Some Exhibitions In The Scottish Cup,
We gave a Wembley wizards too,
And When The Rangers Win The European Cup As We've Done With every One Before,
We'll Gather Round At Ibrox park 100,000 Strong and Give The Boys An Ibrox Roar.

Me Oh Me Oh Me Oh My - Oh How We Love To See Them Cry,
We Love to See The Lassies With The Blue Scarfs On,
We Love To Hear The Boys All Roar,
But I Don't Have To Tell You That The Best Of All
We Love to See The Rangers Score.

 

[anchorage]

I'm not sure you've got the idea.

They are about football are they not?

 

[chieftain]

Theres only two real football song lads

Ossie's dream:

Come on you Spurs, Come on you Spurs,
Come on you.…..
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
Tottenham's going to do it again,
They can't stop 'em,
The boys from Tottenham,
The boys from White Hart Lane,
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
The Kings are claiming their crown,
Everybody will be singing, When the Spurs go marching home

We are the boys from Keithy's army
And we're marching off to war,
We're sending our soldiers to Wembley Under General Burkinshaw,
We know the enemy will fear us,
In the battle coming up,
They won't even get near us
We're gonna capture the cup

Come on you.…..
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
Tottenham's going to do it again,
They can't stop 'em,
The boys from Tottenham,
The boys from White Hart Lane,
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
The Kings are claiming their crown,
Everybody will be singing, When the Spurs go marching home

In our ranks there's Ossie Ardiles,
He's had a dream for a year or two,
That one day he's gonna play at Wembley,
Now his dream is coming true,
Ossie we're gonna be behind, you,
Altogether man for man,
We know you're gonna play a blinder
[Ossie] In de cup for Totting-ham

Come on you.…..
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
Tottenham's going to do it again,
They can't stop 'em,
The boys from Tottenham,
The boys from White Hart Lane,
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
The Kings are claiming their crown,
Everybody will be singing, When the Spurs go marching home

Come on you.…..
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
Tottenham's going to do it again,
They can't stop 'em,
The boys from Tottenham,
The boys from White Hart Lane,
Spurs are on their way to Wembley,
The Kings are claiming their crown,
Everybody will be singing, When the Spurs go marching home

Ossie's going to Wembley,
His knees have gone all trembley,
Come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs

Ossie's going to Wembley,
His knees have gone all trembley,
Come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs

Ossie's going to Wembley,
His knees have gone all trembley,
Come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs

or

Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it again,
We won't give it up,
We’re gonna bring the cup,
Back home to White Hart Lane

They always come see us whether it's rain or snow,
Our supporters never stop at home,
When it comes to playing football everybody knows,
Tottenham's got a style of their own,
We hold the cup that everybody cherishes,
And we won't let it out of our hands,
We can hear them singing on the terraces,
We can hear the voices of our fans

Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it again,
We won't give it up,
We’re gonna bring the cup,
Back home to White Hart Lane

When we get them on the pitch at Wembley,
We'll be entertaining you oi oi,
And just a touch of magic that you’re bound to see,
Like when Ossie’s Dream came true
Stevie can't wait to hold the cup again,
Won't be satisfied until it's in his hands,
He'll hold it up for everyone to see it then,
We'll hear the voices of our fans

Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Come on you Spurs, come on you Spurs,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year,
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it like we did last year
Tottenham Tottenham,
No one can stop them,
We're gonna do it again,
We won't give it up,
We’re gonna bring the cup,
Back home to White Hart Lane

 

[JTG]

Definitely missing the point with that lot.

 

[Placid Casual27]

So, on that "I had an uncle who once played for Red Star Belgrade", has anyone on here ever gone to one of Billy Bragg's (sadly now defunct) NYE gigs at the Hackney Empire, dressed in that very season's Red Star Belgrade shirt (when the self same were arguably the finest side in Europe, early 90s and "Sexuality" was in the charts), and made the schoolboy error of sitting in the front row for the warm up "comedy" by Porky the Poet, aka Phil Jupitus, only to see Porky's eyes open up with glee at this comedy open goal, before regaling a delighted packed entire fucking Empire with a long, lingering and loving-it;

"Here, we've only got some wanker down the front in a Red Star Belgrade shirt, stand up, go on, show 'em"

Has anyone here ever done that, have they?

Scarred me for life it has

 

[Winston Legthigh]

A classic by the Hitchers:

She waited for the match to start
to start a fight up with me.
She said, "what's that you're watching?",
"It's a Programme about art".
She said, "A Programme about art?", I said
"A programme about art" and then the greatest
midfield artist of them all walked out onto the park.
The crowd were on their feet and they whistled and
they cheered for the tiny wee Scotsman
with the copper coloured hair.
She said, "You just don't care, You never listen you know"
Lukic out to Wetherall and Wetherall to Dorigo.
Dorigo knocks it on to Fairclough, Fairclough looks for Speed.
Now she's ranting like a lunatic, "I'm switching off that telly".
"Look at me while I'm talking to you!"
To Strachan now -puts Kelly through
There's one man pulling all the strings and twenty-two
know damn well who.
The air begins to thicken. Inside the box Strachan has stricken
The gap unfilled -he makes the kill -One-Nil

She waited for the match to start
to start a fight up with me.
She said, "what's that you're watching?",
"It's a Programme about art".
She said, "A Programme about art?", I said
"A programme about art" and then the artist
tackles perfectly and floats over the park
to the waiting Rodney Wallace who knocks
it back in to Deane and now the Deane Machine
to McAllister and McAllister's just seen
that Gordon Strachan slipped his marker
and he's free now in space
he's got 'em pouring forward spraying the ball
all over the place.
Now Gary Speed is involved again, he steadies the ball.
"am I talking to myself?", she says, "or talking to the wall?"
"Will you look at me while I'm talking to you!"
To Strachan now -puts Fairclough through
There's one man pulling all the strings and twenty-two
know damn well who.
The air gets even thicker.
The 'keepers quick -Gordon Strachan's quicker.
The gap unfilled -he makes the kill -Two-Nil.

She waited for the match to start
to start a fight up with me.
She said, "what's that you're watching?",
"It's a Programme about art".
"If you don't take your grief and bad vibes and get out of my face
I'm gonna sit right here and whistle my way through Melrose Place"

You could've lit the air in the room with a matchstick,
McAllisters cross sets up Strachans hat-trick
The gap unfilled -Strachans skill -Three-Nil

thankyou so much for this!!

i remember hearing this on john peel (where else) about a decade ago

loved it, but had no idea who it was by and had never heard it again since

fantastic

 

[1927]

Because I didnt realise what bands he had played in, I didnt realise that the classic football song namechecks a band that Ed played in!!