Getting a restraining order against nuisance neighbour?

Discussion in 'benefits and housing' started by AnnO'Neemus, Feb 25, 2018.

  1. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Does anyone have any experience/advice about this?

    My Nasty Neighbour has been banging on my door and being verbally abusive and swearing at me. She's previously been told by me and the housing trust that if she has any issues, she has to go through the housing and not to approach or contact me.

    I called the cops and he said that he'd go and warn her to stay away from me, but he also suggested a non-molestation(?!?) order like a restraining order or something.

    Has anyone else had to do this? How easy/hard was it? How expensive is it?

    Any advice anyone can give me would be very gratefully appreciated as I'm at my wits end.
    Pickman's model likes this.
  2. marty21

    marty21 One on one? You're crazy.

    You can apply for a non-molestation order at court , no idea of how much it costs , you'll need to get independent legal advice on that. Have you spoken to the Housing Trust ? They could speak to her about her behaviour , issue a warning . Get the copper to have a word , they can't do much else at the moment , non-molestation orders can have a power of arrest attached to them . You could speak to Social Services to see if she is known to them, there may be a history of mental health issues ,or get the Housing Trust to make enquiries. If she has a history of anti social behaviour she might be known to the Community Safety team (or whatever your council calls it ) who can also get in involved.
  3. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Thank you, Marty. Her and her ex-bf have a history of antisocial behaviour, but the housing trust was useless at dealing with it. Things had quietened down after they split up.

    I'm actually the one with mental health problems. I'm Aspie (Asperger's Syndrome on the autistic spectrum), plus I've suffered from depression. And the antisocial behaviour problems I experienced several years ago with her and her ex-bf - they ended up having 'domestics' before they split up and he left - was very 'triggering' for me, because I'm a care leaver (I was in care because I'd been physically abused by my father) and also a survivor of domestic abuse myself (my first boyfriend turned out violent).

    All the hostility and aggression and verbal abuse are badly affecting my mental health, and I'm on a waiting list for psychotherapy and also waiting to be assessed for a possible diagnosis of PTSD. I can't deal with all the conflict and it's very distressing and making me ill.
  4. tim

    tim Well-Known Member

    I am very sorry to read this AnnO'Neemus. I hope you get all the support you need.
  5. marty21

    marty21 One on one? You're crazy.

    AnnO'Neemus Do you have a support worker who can get involved in this ? If you don't, contact the Housing Trust , they should have someone who can assist. If you have a social worker get them involved. Or speak to your local councillor or MP . Their letters and phone calls aren't ignored .
    Badgers and AnnO'Neemus like this.
  6. hash tag

    hash tag never too old

    Best with this AnnO'Neemus. My first piece of advice is to keep a detailed diary as this will really help in any subsequent action you take, for you will certainly be asked to back up
    any claims you make.
  7. Throbbing Angel

    Throbbing Angel it's a very pretty colour this ambulance, isn't it

    If you have a smart-enough-phone AnnO'Neemus you could use the Noiseapp to record any further doorbanging and shouting. The Noise App - Report Noise Nuisance

    Our Environmental Health staff ask people who report noise nuisances to use this as an adjunct to the keeping of a diary. It uses the GPS/location of your phone to prove you were at home when it was happening. In your case it'll record door banging and verbal abuse.

    I hope you get the help you need on this - sounds like no fun.
  8. Throbbing Angel

    Throbbing Angel it's a very pretty colour this ambulance, isn't it

    Oh, and you can report this ASB to your Council as well as to your housing trust - especially in light of your health being impacted by this.
    AnnO'Neemus likes this.
  9. editor

    editor Taffus Maximus

    That's something Badger Kitten knows all about but I don't think she posts here any more.
    AnnO'Neemus likes this.
  10. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Thanks for this, that app is brilliant!

    I've just downloaded the Noise App and tested it by recording some of the loud building noise coming from hers. It's super simple to register and use it. And I've just put it on the home page of my mobile for easy access in case she kicks off again. Much appreciated.
    Throbbing Angel likes this.
  11. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Thanks all, for the suggestions and support. It turns out the non-molestation order isn't appropriate, because that's really for family members/people who've lived at the same address, rather than neighbours. So I've got an appointment with a solicitor next week, who's going to write some kind of 'cease and desist' type letter, and I'll ask him about injunctions or what other options are available to me.
  12. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Good idea. The housing trust has been spectacularly rubbish at dealing with previous problems.
  13. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    I've been a bit rubbish at documenting stuff in diary format. I've sometimes sent emails to the housing, or to my local tenants and residents association, or sometimes grumbled to a mate who's lent a shoulder to cry on, or had a bit of a rant on Facebook about what's been going on. In hindsight, I should have kept a diary. But will try to do so from now on, cheers.
  14. hash tag

    hash tag never too old

    I was to. Try sending an email to anyone, even yourself when you have issues, it's all a documented record.
    Miss-Shelf likes this.
  15. squirrelp

    squirrelp Banned Banned

    This might be rather basic advice but... are you answering the door? If it is your neighbour, then just as a rule do not answer - just record the noise. If she hangs around outside your door, that is harassment and you can call the police. I would expect she would give up if you are consistent with this.
  16. Puddy_Tat

    Puddy_Tat meh

    if the e-mails are still in your 'sent items' folder and the farcebook things still on there, then maybe worth copying them to a word document or similar as start of a diary?
    Thimble Queen likes this.
  17. StoneRoad

    StoneRoad heckling from the back!

    AnnO'Neemus You can go back over all these other sources as Puddy_Tat has suggested to compile a record of past events, even get your mate to record when you "cried on their shoulder" - it doesn't matter that it is from different places and not all written down as soon as it happened.
    Keeping a verbatim diary - everything as and when it happened - is quite an undertaking, it can be very helpful if you can manage it.
    I quite like the idea of that noise app, sounds very useful.
  18. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    Thanks all. I've been using the noise app to record some of the noise. And environmental health are going to send a letter to my neighbour and they're also going to send me some diary sheets to log stuff on.

    A further incident was that my neighbour's boyfriend rang my doorbell at 05:45h last Saturday as I was woken up and answered the intercom to a man's voice saying 'Let me in I've lost my keys and money' so I said 'You don't live here' and he said 'Yes I do let me in' so I just hung up the intercom but then he rang her doorbell and I heard noise in the stairwell and she was presumably letting her bf in.

    It's a bit of an interesting coincidence that just after she receives a solicitor's letter telling her to stop harassing me that her bf rings my doorbell and wakes me up at stupid o'clock in the morning.

    And the housing are being incompetent and rubbish as usual.
  19. AnnO'Neemus

    AnnO'Neemus Is so vanilla

    No I didn't answer the door because she was banging on my door loudly, violently and persistently while swearing at me and being abusive and I hate conflict so I wasn't going to engage with someone behaving like that. And I've told her repeatedly in the past to take things up with the housing if she thinks she has any issues with me.

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