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Friends' Miscarriage At 26 Weeks

Cloo said:
That's awful - gsv just found out that a mate's wife had to abort a child at about that stage, when a scan revealed catastropic brain non-development. Just doesn't bear thinking about. :(

I think the thing is just to be there for them, not to try to avoid them or talking about it if they need to.
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Yes- this happened to a friend of mine too :(

just awful :(

she went to have healthy twins less than a year later but it was hell for her for many months. So glad it's turning out alright now.

she wanted to talk about it a lot - listening helps. She may still be quite tense about things - after my miscarriage I always worried things would go wrong.
 
thats lovely news Yelkcub - that 26 weeks seems a cruel time, friends of mine had a boy at 27 weeks and recently had him 'signed off' - as in the docs aren't concerned about his health any more (he's 2).
 
Excellent news. :cool:

Interesting stuff on this thread about how people deal with this. IIRC there has been a trend recently towards fewer children being stillborn, but balanced out by more dying very soon after birth. It's an artefact of medical attitudes to this issue. It used to be thought that a stillbirth was easier for the parents because they didn't have to go through registering a live birth and having a formal funeral. More recently it's been realised that most parents going through this need to acknowledge the child as having existed, so signs of life post-birth are more likely to be formally noted.

/factoid
 
Don't want to make a big thread about it but my best friend has just lost her baby :(
I am so sad on her behalf. The only positive bit is she has a really lovely partner and they are very supportive of each other.
I just wish it wasn't so, heartbreaking.
 
Glad to hear your friends good news. How has the lady been throughout?? I was stresssed to hell the pregnancy after a stillbirth and decided never again. Fortunately I got my boy that I wanted :)
 
Clair De Lune said:
Don't want to make a big thread about it but my best friend has just lost her baby :(
I am so sad on her behalf. The only positive bit is she has a really lovely partner and they are very supportive of each other.
I just wish it wasn't so, heartbreaking.
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How sad. Hopefuly they're strong enough to come through this together.
 
fuck fuck fuck.

my mate who stayed with me for the whole 70+ hours of kid1's labour had a post 20 week termination for a condition incompatible with life last year. i just found out she's having another miscarriage atm. i have to phone her but i'm in bits. what the hell can i say?
 
:(
It's so hard to know what to say as there is nothing to be said that will make it any better. I just told my mate I am here for her and sending all my love and that I was so so sorry.
 
i wish i could be there for her, she's 150 miles away. i called, she was fine, she's dealt with so much in her life, i'm trying to take inspiration from her strength.
 
Clair De Lune said:
:(
It's so hard to know what to say as there is nothing to be said that will make it any better. I just told my mate I am here for her and sending all my love and that I was so so sorry.
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That is all you can say bob, and you can still be there for someone who is that far away - not physically, but in every other way.

My words and brain ain't working today - hope you know what I mean.
 
i do know what you mean. i'm not really in any kind of place to be there for other people atm, i wish i was. she understands.
 
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