Football cliches

Discussion in 'football' started by editor, Apr 24, 2008.

  1. editor

    editor Taffus Maximus

    [​IMG]


    Damn! I wish I had the time to update my old comic.
    (I know it's bad form to laugh at your own jokes, but I hadn't seen this for years and it did amuse me)
     
  2. Andy the Don

    Andy the Don Wise men say only fools..

    Don't worry about updating.. "it's early doors yet.." - Ron Atkinson, the king of the football cliche.
     
  3. upsidedownwalrus

    upsidedownwalrus RIP R.I.P.

    Ron Atkinson really was the worst commentator ever, wasn't he. Virtually every bit of commentary was along the lines of "Wow, that would have been a goal if it had gone in."
     
  4. toblerone3

    toblerone3 Grrrrr

    Which side do you think will be enjoying their half time cup of tea more Ron?
     
  5. Relahni

    Relahni New Member

    He's on fire at the minute
     
  6. purves grundy

    purves grundy ambient clown remix

    They've gotta start asking more questions
     
  7. purves grundy

    purves grundy ambient clown remix

    In defiance of the laws of physics

    It's a greasy surface so the ball's gonna pick up pace
     
  8. Relahni

    Relahni New Member

    It's a stonewall penalty.
     
  9. upsidedownwalrus

    upsidedownwalrus RIP R.I.P.

    "Stonewall" isn't even the right word to use. It should be "Stone cold".

    I hate all the FA cup cliches - "Potential Bananaskin" being the worst. :mad:
     
  10. Epico

    Epico wordsmiff

    That one's always baffled me - a penalty that's "working for equality and justice for lesbians, gay men and bisexuals." :confused: :confused:
     
  11. purves grundy

    purves grundy ambient clown remix

    As annoying as the "naivity" of African / Asian teams in the World Cup :mad: :rolleyes:
     
  12. Relahni

    Relahni New Member

    The magic of the FA cup
     
  13. TrippyLondoner

    TrippyLondoner Well-Known Member

    " the defence fell asleep"

    Is one that springs to mind..can't think of any others that haven't been said yet.
     
  14. toblerone3

    toblerone3 Grrrrr

    Playing in the hole behind him.
     
  15. toblerone3

    toblerone3 Grrrrr

    "Parked a bus in front of the goal"
     
  16. Artie Fufkin

    Artie Fufkin Polymer Records

    a 'six pointer' :confused::D
     
  17. Epico

    Epico wordsmiff

    I like that one.

    "squeeky bum time"
     
  18. Relahni

    Relahni New Member

    He's got the holding role.
     
  19. Monkeygrinder's Organ

    Monkeygrinder's Organ Dodgy geezer swilling vapid lager

    'You can never underestimate the importance of the away goal' - especially with the commentators mentioning it every 30 seconds.:rolleyes:
     
  20. aylee

    aylee In exile in Haringay

    "The boy done well".

    I saw Eddie Newton on Match Of The Day once and that was all he said about every player in every game.
     
  21. Monkeygrinder's Organ

    Monkeygrinder's Organ Dodgy geezer swilling vapid lager

    "He'll be a little bit disappoinetd with that" or "he'll feel he might have done better there" meaning "he properly cocked that up."
     
  22. toblerone3

    toblerone3 Grrrrr

    "intense local rivalry"

    "lit the fuse"

    "all over the park"

    "the goalie's made himself big"

    "a free header"

    "no-one's picked him up"

    "nutmegged"

    "screaming for the ball"
     
  23. Artie Fufkin

    Artie Fufkin Polymer Records

    I think that's now called 'a John Arne Riise'? :p
     
  24. upsidedownwalrus

    upsidedownwalrus RIP R.I.P.

    Exactly!!!
     
  25. Monkeygrinder's Organ

    Monkeygrinder's Organ Dodgy geezer swilling vapid lager

    Why didn't Riise get to Moscow?

    Because he was heading in the wrong direction.





    (Have we had that on here yet? A cliche in the making.:oops:)
     
  26. upsidedownwalrus

    upsidedownwalrus RIP R.I.P.

    :D
     
  27. upsidedownwalrus

    upsidedownwalrus RIP R.I.P.

    One of the worst bits of commentary I've heard recently was in one of the recentish England 2008 qualifiers. It was one of the 3-0 home wins, either vs Israel or Russia. Anyway, it was a corner, and, I kid you not, as Ferdinand and Terry came up for the corner, John Motson said "And the heavy mob are coming up for this".

    :mad:
     
  28. TrippyLondoner

    TrippyLondoner Well-Known Member

    " this guy is the next maradona" "the next zidane'..etc

    Stupid comparisons like that count in this thread i think. Bloody annoys me cause no one is the next anyone, they are themselves.
     
  29. tom_craggs

    tom_craggs Well-Known Member

    I have heard 'he's literally on fire at the moment' before...
     
  30. tom_craggs

    tom_craggs Well-Known Member

    I heard Waddle (why do we have to listen to him on the radio?) say something along the lines of 'We all know the Brazilians like to eat and party' the other evening...that's all of them...

    In fact Waddle is full of them, but as has been mentioned, Atkinson was the worst - 'if only the goal had been two yards bigger, 'if only it had gone to the right of the keeper' - Less cliches I suppose and more just nonsense and irrelevance...don't miss him at all.
     

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