Films which you can see were intended to be deep and meaningful but were just crap

[trabuquera]

Repeat votes for American Beauty, Lost in Translation, and Crash (the LA one).

New Pretentious Bollocks nominations for:
Babel (people just DON'T COMMUNICATE! who knew?)
Adaptation (supposedly a masterpiece - I never even finished it)
Steve Zissou's The Life Aquatic (utterly pointless and mannered ...)
Trouble Every Day (well, I suppose seeing Beatrice Dalle as a live-flesh-eating vampire might attract some viewers, but the Deeper Meanings evaded me)
Uzak (nearly 2 hours of utter Turkish tedium - arthouse critics adored it)

 

[DotCommunist]

Dark City

Didn't they give a shit about consistency in this film: people falling down unconscious only to wake up later and not ask themselves what the fuck they were doing on the floor or how a twelve-story building erects itself overnight.

And what was with all that weird pointless speech pattern? All a bit overt in it's attempt to be original, and yet we had the totally banal Hell Raiser teeth-chattering rip-off.

Did you miss the bit where everyone is controlled psychicaly by these powedul alien psykers and thier amplifying machines?

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

He just didn't do anything for me. *shrug*

He was the embodiment of an elemental force, a concept. He wasn't meant to be a rounded character.

 

[QueenOfGoths]

"Donnie Darko" - other people's "oh my god, it's fantastic" reactions to the film made me feel like I couldn't understand it and was thus missing out on some amazing revelation. Then I just realised I didn't like it and it didn't say anything - to me at least.

 

[kabbes]

Brick

Oh God, yes. Worst film I've ever seen, I reckon.

Well -- I say "seen". I actually couldn't bear it for more than 30 minutes. One of only two films I've ever actually stopped watching having hired it from a DVD shop. Completely awful in every way. Here's the thing: you CAN NOT DO "hard-boiled" with a bunch of wanky So-Cal teenagers. It really doesn't work.

 

[SpookyFrank]

Requiem for a Dream.

Drugs are bad, m'kay?

All that guy's films are intolerably shit. Especially the fountain. But I probably hate 'requiem' the most because it's so horrifically depressing.

 

[Brainaddict]

Pan's Labyrinth - evil murderous facists are evil and should be fought. Thanks.
No Country For Old Men - ................................... Thanks very much.

 

[Gromit]

Garden State is the indie American Beauty. Twee empty platitudes.

Apocalypse Now is toss, but it's toss on a grand scale so it kind of works

Another vote for American Beauty but I like Garden State.

 

[Gromit]

Repeat votes for American Beauty, Lost in Translation, and Crash (the LA one).

Heathen! I fucking love that film.

 

[electrogirl]

Heathen! I fucking love that film.

meh. i didn't feel any sympathy for the characters and it's one of those films that about 2 days later i couldn't remember a single thing about.

 

[stdPikachu]

Jacobs Ladder. Unwatchable bilge that thinks it's far cleverer than you.

'no country for old men' - empty art arse.

Agreed. Had fuck all of a point to it, just a series of pretentious art student sketches. Same kettle of fish as children of men IMHO - gorgeous to look at, skin-deep beauty.Absolutely nothing of any substance.

It's like a teenager's first trip.

"imagine right, if we were just brains in vats, yeh"

It's like Max Freakout writing sci-fi

Max would be unable to believe that his thoughts could take physical form in the way of writing, and the knowledge of how to write doesn't exist because knowledge is impossible. Max would get as far as imagining the credits before his head asplode.

 

[Santino]

He was the embodiment of an elemental force, a concept. He wasn't meant to be a rounded character.

Whether or not he was supposed to be the embodiment of anything, the portrayal of the character was just uninteresting. It takes more than a philosophical idea to make a decently entertaining and/or interesting character.

 

[kained&able]

no country for old men. is that the tommy lee jones one where it all turns out to be a dream. If so yeah that was bollocks.

Not sure if its really deep but 3:15 to yuma or whatever its called. Im sure its meant to have a deep ending with the dangerous outlaw finding his humanity and sacrificng yadda yadda yadda, but they fucked it up royally.


dave

 

[alsoknownas]

I actually like a lot of the films on this thread (Matrix, Donnie Darko, American Beauty), but found them entertaining rather than 'deep'.

Another film I rather enjoyed but could easily sneak on to this list - Last Year in Marienbad.

(I'm being a bit devil's advocate)

 

[Gromit]

Have we had Vanilla Sky yet?

 

[Andy the Don]

Road to Predition..

Supposed to be the best film about the 1920/30 American criminal underworld. But it was shit, well that's obvious as it had Tom Hanks in it.

 

[DotCommunist]

Another vote for american beauty here. That bag-in-the-wind scene was such bit of wankery

 

[London_Calling]

"Donnie Darko" - other people's "oh my god, it's fantastic" reactions to the film made me feel like I couldn't understand it and was thus missing out on some amazing revelation. Then I just realised I didn't like it and it didn't say anything - to me at least.

But marvellous nonsense for undergrads searching for 'meaning' aqnd 'truth': pretentious, vacuous garbage, and very cynically done.

 

[Santino]

Road to Predition..

Supposed to be the best film about the 1920/30 American criminal underworld. But it was shit, well that's obvious as it had Tom Hanks in it.

Oh, Christ. How on earth can you make a film about men in smart suits shooting each other so miserably tedious?

 

[Gromit]

Ooh Ooh I just remembered my most hated supposed deep film...

The Thin Red Line.

 

[mrsfran]

I concur with Donnie Darko. It insists upon itself.

 

[rubbershoes]

all of the Three Colours films

*yawn*

ok i know im a philistine but they all washed over me and left me cold

 

[Gromit]

all of the Three Colours films

*yawn*

ok i know im a philistine but they all washed over me and left me cold

Despite many attempts to record these I'm destined never to watch these films I'm sure.

It may have something to do with wanting to have all three available to watch in a row and never knowing in which order they are supposed to be watched.

 

[littlebabyjesus]

Anything by Kieslowski is invariably beautiful to look at and enjoyable to watch, but ultimately means very little. I don't see any meaning in any of the Three Colours films. Why does blokely cry at the end of White, for example? What does A Short Film about Killing actually say about killing? The Double Life of Veronique is probably the worst offender - really lovely to watch, but wtf is it about, really? It's like you have to come up with your own motivations for the characters, because there are very few clues in the films.

Am I missing something here?

 

[littlebabyjesus]

Despite many attempts to record these I'm destined never to watch these films I'm sure.

It may have something to do with wanting to have all three available to watch in a row and never knowing in which order they are supposed to be watched.

They are self-contained - watch in any order.

 

[London_Calling]

I'm unnaturally wary of films containing large, multicoloured, oblong-shaped flags, almost always carried by men on horseback - it's surely the sign of an impoverished props and plot department.

I haven't seen the 3 Colours trilogy for fear of that.

 

[littlebabyjesus]

I'm unnaturally wary of films containing large, multicoloured, oblong-shaped flags, almost always carried by men on horseback - it's surely the sign of an impoverished props and plot department.

I haven't seen the 3 Colours trilogy for fear of that.

Um...

 

[Santino]

Anything by Kieslowski is invariably beautiful to look at and enjoyable to watch, but ultimately means very little. I don't see any meaning in any of the Three Colours films. Why does blokely cry at the end of White, for example? What does A Short Film about Killing actually say about killing? The Double Life of Veronique is probably the worst offender - really lovely to watch, but wtf is it about, really? It's like you have to come up with your own motivations for the characters, because there are very few clues in the films.

Am I missing something here?

You can say that about any film, indeed, any work of art. What does Hamlet really actually say about anything at all? Get a fucking move on, you indecisive Danish twat?

What films do you think 'say' something?

 

[tommers]

I'm unnaturally wary of films containing large, multicoloured, oblong-shaped flags, almost always carried by men on horseback - it's surely the sign of an impoverished props and plot department.

I haven't seen the 3 Colours trilogy for fear of that.

"Ran" is brilliant.

 

[littlebabyjesus]

You can say that about any film, indeed, any work of art. What does Hamlet really actually say about anything at all? Get a fucking move on, you indecisive Danish twat?

What films do you think 'say' something?

Maybe 'say' is the wrong word. 'Provide a new way of looking at' would be better - all art should do that.