Dulwich Hamlet FC 2013-2014 season - chat, rumours, reports

Discussion in 'Dulwich Hamlet FC' started by editor, May 30, 2013.

  1. PartisanDulwich

    PartisanDulwich Well-Known Member

    A rare excursion to corporate football today (apologies) City at Southamptom
    best bit was the 1 minute for Mandela (did you get that at Wingate & Finchley - given they did for Thatcher)

    Anyway comrades !!

    Need all the details

    how many fans made the trek
    atmosphere etc

    I guess the voodoo stick has been re programmed after Wealdstone effectively blocked its powers

    Its what I want to hear about tonight.....
  2. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    On the Northern Line towards West Finchley the Voodoo Stick attracted much attention, not least from the cutest little middle-class bundle of 5 year old innocence I've ever seen. Her mother, meh, one of those 'It's Grim Up North London' types, insipid chin all crumbly cheese and biscuits, and indeed, they got off at Highgate. But nevertheless the girl charmed me with how besotted she was with the Voodoo Stick. After much nervousness she finally asked me what it was. "It's a magic staff that I take to football matches to help my favourite team win," I explained. Her face lit up with wonderment. "Are you a wizard?" she asked. I thought for a moment. "Yes, yes I suppose I am." Whoops. One day she's gonna be so disappointed by the reality of football.

    And then some football happened. Dulwich Hamlet, resplendent in their yellow & green away kit, went right up in the first minute and scored, Ian Daly with an unDalyesque scrappy poach from a rebound. Everyone was mid-trapse towards the goal, it was almost a rude interruption. We sang for most of the remaining first half, though Wingate & Finchley tried to slowly kill us by being the most moribund team we've encountered away thus far in the Isthmian Prem. Dulwich failed to capitalise, so it remained dodgily 1-0 up until half-time.

    Second half, this time under a tin-roof terrace. A reminder of how great the acoustics are in those things. Some brilliant chanting, banging etc. Erhun gets sent thru one-on-one, slow-motion, moment of (our) doubt, clinical finish. BOOM, game wrapped up. Except this is the new look Hamlet with their molten marshmallow defensive formation. Two nothing goals conceded in five minutes. What the hell? Deary me. Hope ebbing away. For a while W&F looked by far the most likely to score the next one. Ellis Green comes on (welcome back!). We start attacking. Brave goalkeeping stops us on a few occasions. Running out of time. Singing frustrated rather than joyous. Cursing and gallow humour.

    Injury time free-kick out wide-ish. Ellis takes it... everyone misses it.. it's gone in!!! FUCKING YES. Partytime, Dulwich Hamlet style. Declarations of love. Sore throats roaring effortlessly. Hugs, fistpumps and raved predictions that utopia is on its way.

    As the final whistle went I glanced at the mask of the Voodoo Stick. To my jawdropping amazement it gave me a cheeky wink. Suddenly I realised, and even now I can't believe it - the magic of said staff had somehow (don't ask me how!) sucked the ball into the back of the net! I thought back to that little girl on the tube... I turned to the camera and laughed. [FADE TO PINK]
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2013
  3. PartisanDulwich

    PartisanDulwich Well-Known Member

    Rob or maybe Gandalf

    Brilliant match day report

    “[Gandalf] ...'I'm looking for someone to share in an adventure, and it's very difficult to find anyone.'

    [Bilbo] 'I should think so, in these parts. We're plain, quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things, they make you late for dinner.”

    J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit
    vornstyle76 likes this.
  4. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    I've actually recently been re-reading Michael Moorcock's guilt-ridden and/or swaggering anti-heros, which exposes Tolkien as the reactionary China Mieville later described him as: "resolutely rural, petty bourgeois, conservative, anti-modernist, misanthropically Christian and anti-intellectual".

    Incidentally, Moorcock once wrote this in 1987: The little hills and woods of that Surrey of the mind, the Shire [where the protagonist 'hobbits' live], are 'safe' but the wild landscapes everywhere beyond the Shire are 'dangerous'... Lord of the Rings is a pernicious confirmation of the values of a morally bankrupt middle class... If the Shire is a suburban garden, Sauron [the 'evil' dark lord] and his henchmen are that old bourgeois bugaboo, the mob--mindless football supporters throwing their beer bottles over the fence--the worst aspect of modern urban society represented as the whole by the a fearful, backward-yearning class. Given the date LOTR was written, I think it was Moorcock who was perhaps indulging the conservative moral panic about football...

    Anyway, back on topic, I think Edgar Kail and Erhun Oztumer may be aspects of his Eternal Champion.
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2013
    el-ahrairah likes this.
  5. Yorick

    Yorick Well-Known Member

    There was certainly some shaministic power generated and ebbing around under that tin roof in the second half.

    When Erhun was bearing down on that goalie for the second goal, he glanced up and our eyes met. Time stopped, pens were placed to rest in idle thought, a child asked a stranger on a train about the wand he was carrying, stars exploded, someone placed two sugar cubes into a cup of tea and realised they were in love for the first time, waves crashed into rocks, and the consciousnesses of two men born two months apart in the spring of 1991 melded together. We were one. And Erhun Oztumer spoke to me.

    I know you missed the first goal because you were getting a pint. So I'm going to aim this one right at your face.
    pettyboy, editor, Onket and 1 other person like this.
  6. editor

    editor Forked with electrons

    I feel compelled to add some of these fabulous observations to the Brixton Buzz site when I get back (if that's OK with everyone). More people need to know about the majestic power of the Hamlet Effect.
    Yorick likes this.
  7. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    One step ahead of you Mike - I've asked Joel if you can use some of his photos.
  8. editor

    editor Forked with electrons

    Hamlet in NYC

    Attached Files:

    vornstyle76 likes this.
  9. editor

    editor Forked with electrons

    Couldn't resist.

    Attached Files:

    vornstyle76 likes this.
  10. magneze

    magneze mnemonic beef

    Twitter feed was amusing. The goal tweet was before the team lineup tweet! :D
  11. PartisanDulwich

    PartisanDulwich Well-Known Member

    Ham & High on Wingate & Finchley V DHFC

    "Dulwich are quite a famous club in non-league circles. Unfortunately they have hit on hard times in recent years, but they are very much on the up and were promoted to our division only last season – and they look very much like they may be passing through on their way to the Conference South this season."

    A very fair report - and seem like nice people at W&F - Glad there seems to have been some mutual respect by fans at the game

    Another report states

    "Luckily the revenue streams of the absent fans were more than matched by a combination of The Gibbon Wreckers and the traveling Dulwich Hamlet fans a vast majority of which looked like they were on their way to an anti Vietnam war protest."


    All good stuff

    As DHFC fans and by in large "progressives" we should be in the business of promoting non-league football and spreading the joy - We are fortunate that we are a growing club, many clubs we face are not

    Not pissing off rival fans and encouraging mutual respect is surely our mantra (and that was even shown when we played Leatherhead)

    Spread the Joy

    Gavin Roses Pink & Blue Army
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2013
    pettyboy, Lucy Fur and editor like this.
  12. Onket

    Onket Je suis [CONTENT REMOVED]

    The Gibbon Wreckers?!
  13. PartisanDulwich

    PartisanDulwich Well-Known Member

    Gibbons Wreckers YFC
    The club was formed in 2007 but previously was named 'The Rachel Yankey football programme'. A programme where kids came along and trained with a view to developing their football skills as well as social skills and making new friends.

    One Saturday in early 2007 Andy and Rachel took a team of boys and girls over to Peckham to play a team in a friendly match, The players really enjoyed themselves and asked if we could start a team, Rachel felt that after all the training they had received it would be good for the players and the community if we created a club where young people could come and play in a organised and competitive team against others who have the same morals and beliefs as us.

    The name Gibbons Wreckers comes from the ground in which we play on (Gibbons Recreation Ground).
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2013
    Onket likes this.
  14. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    Given it was quite an old turn-out (compared to home games) perhaps they're referring to time being cyclical.
  15. Yorick

    Yorick Well-Known Member

    Maybe they sell Finnegans Wake in the club shop.
  16. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    I'm a bit slow, but I've finally got the Yorick reference. tremendous stuff!
  17. Yorick

    Yorick Well-Known Member

    This is what happens when you have witty chants and absurd abuse that attracts recent Lit grads.

    Also, I just want Hamlet to remember me after I'm gone, sniff (etc)
    el-ahrairah and vornstyle76 like this.
  18. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    We've actually got a (young, precariat) doctor of literature lurking around Champion Hill. He said of my Ian Daly video, "One quibble: communism's 'inevitability' is, at least according to Marx, dialectical... Or is this tying your colours to the accelerationist mast of Deleuzeanism?" Fucking tough crowd.
  19. el-ahrairah

    el-ahrairah forward communism, forward gerbils!

    maybe i missed the important part of the discussion, or maybe i'm a big thicky but i don't see what the quibble is. communism is inevitable, said marx, using a dialectical process to explain the process. thesis: primitive communism. antithesis: slavery-feudalism-capitalism. synthesis: post-industrial communism.

    now, accelerationism is new to me but it appears to state that capitalism creates demand which in turn sustains capitalism, which is partially achieved by sustaining an artificially low rate of unemployment - i.e. creating jobs to stimulate the markets to sustain the continued dominance of capitalism (which i think sums up the blair-brown approach to pub sector jobs). Deleuze is only really important to big brains in university departments and not to the working man so i haven't the foggiest what he thinks of the inevitability of communism and dulwich hamlet. it may well be that it is only through knowledge of Deleuze that I would appreciate the quibble...

    so where is the quibble? the two ideas can live together, dialectic materialism is a process of thinking clearly, not a theory in itself. capitalists may use the state's power to prop up the corpse of capitalism for a few years, but communism is still inevitable. that inevitability may not be for many years, not in our lifetimes, but inevitable it is. capitalism is unsustainable, it eats its own children.
    vornstyle76 and Lucy Fur like this.
  20. ska invita

    ska invita back on the other side

    the faster Erhun runs the sooner we get there ;)
    vornstyle76 and el-ahrairah like this.
  21. ska invita

    ska invita back on the other side

  22. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    In my raving and totally irrational post-Enfield excitement I'd referred to the Daly turn* as a "dialectic destroying cobra morph" (and in the subsequent video).

    * = not to be confused with the 'Linguistic Turn', or indeed the 'Cruyff Turn'.
    Last edited: Dec 10, 2013
    el-ahrairah likes this.
  23. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    Fucking gay middle-class weirdo football-ruining HIPSTERS!!!
  24. Changing The Rabble's name?
    vornstyle76 likes this.
  25. ConorPope

    ConorPope New Member

    I'm a Lit grad too, hopefully there'll be some good pre-match chat coming to the Hill
  26. SDE

    SDE Well-Known Member

  27. el-ahrairah

    el-ahrairah forward communism, forward gerbils!

    literature and philosophy here :embarrassed:
  28. vornstyle76

    vornstyle76 Vorn Chic Vorn Genre

    Where the hell is the Vaughan option for sexiness? etc.
  29. ska invita

    ska invita back on the other side

    "Now, to the controversial bits. Don't shoot me, kick the cat or poison your mother... I'm just asking the questions, man. First off - Would you vote for the club changing its name to Brixton Rovers in return for a corporate takeover, long-term ground security and £3million pound investment to the playing budget over 5 years?"

    is that a possibility?
  30. Onket

    Onket Je suis [CONTENT REMOVED]

    If enough 'yes' votes are cast.

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