Drunken Christmas Philosophy Thread

[Dillinger4]

what you all really need to do, right, is like open your mind. You know, like really, yeh?

 

[kyser_soze]

NAHHHHHH! NVP pissed hisself!!! Wanker.

 

[tufty79]

you're right, dill, you're so right, man.

*gets hacksaw*

 

[MightyAphrodite]

why is it like all warm n stuff when you piss yourself but like after a few minutes your freezing and youre like 'this is so not cool'

 

[Dillinger4]

I mean like, life, right is just like, you know.

 

[Voley]

NAHHHHHH! NVP pissed hisself!!! Wanker.

I was making a statement. About something, like.

 

[Voley]

I mean like, life, right is just like, you know.

I agree a bit.

Actually, nah. I don't

 

[kyser_soze]

tufty! NO!!!! Don't try and hacksaw your head off you muppet!!!!!

Fucks sake, I'm not cleaning that blood up.

 

[Dillinger4]

I mean, like, when you think about it, isn't pissing yourself the ultimate metaphor, yeh? I mean like its all wet, and what else is wet? Your Brain.

 

[kyser_soze]

Just shows you're getting old, and that soon you'll smell of piss and cabbage all day.

 

[Dillinger4]

I agree a bit.

Actually, nah. I don't

You just got a closed mind man. don't be like, so negative.

 

[Voley]

Exactly! That's exactly what I was trying to say!

That Dilly, eh? Fuckin top bloke, watcher drinkin, mate? I'm a bit strapped, like, canyergerruzzzone?

Agh. I've pissed meself again. Metaphorically.

 

[MightyAphrodite]

weebage would be such a fuckin cool fragrance like, i mean youd say is that wee or cabbage and then be all, i dont know man

 

[El Jefe]

CORDUROY

<does starjump>

 

[Dillinger4]

Exactly! That's exactly what I was trying to say!

That Dilly, eh? Fuckin top bloke, watcher drinkin, mate? I'm a bit strapped, like, canyergerruzzzone?

Agh. I've pissed meself again. Metaphorically.

That's it, mannn. Get in touch with the cosmos.

 

[bluestreak]

i was talking to this fella, right, and he said the me that leytonstone is full of leylines. got it? fucking leylines right, and that's why it's called leytonstone. and once upon a time there used to be a big stone there out on wanstead flats near 'ollow ponds or summit. it was probably like as big as fucking stonehenge. i said, what about leyton. he said, you know it's not as important cos they didn't build the central line depot there. to tap into the leylines, see? in fact, the central line from liverpool street to essex via north london follows the path of the leylines from some fucking church all the way to ongar. of course, you have to get a bus from epping these days. thatcher's lot did that, they broke the power of the leylines when they cancelled the north-eastern end of the central line, broke it just like that. all that earth-energy, he said, just lost. i said, yeah, that makes a lot of sense, thatcher's lot would do that. he said did i know that michael hesiltine is a mason, and i said to him, nah, not him, he's an oddfellow, and the bloke asked if i was taking the piss. kinell, pass us the vino will you, i'm getting a bit dry here. did i tell you about the time i met michael aspel in a public toilet in horsham?

 

[Dillinger4]

CORDUROY

<does starjump>

Yeh, right, but what colour does the corduroy sound like?

 

[Voley]

That's it, mannn. Get in touch with the cosmos.

Make me one with everything, like.

In touch with me inner twat, me.

 

[Dillinger4]

i was talking to this fella, right, and he said the me that leytonstone is full of leylines. got it? fucking leylines right, and that's why it's called leytonstone. and once upon a time there used to be a big stone there out on wanstead flats near 'ollow ponds or summit. it was probably like as big as fucking stonehenge. i said, what about leyton. he said, you know it's not as important cos they didn't build the central line depot there. to tap into the leylines, see? in fact, the central line from liverpool street to essex via north london follows the path of the leylines from some fucking church all the way to ongar. of course, you have to get a bus from epping these days. thatcher's lot did that, they broke the power of the leylines when they cancelled the north-eastern end of the central line, broke it just like that. all that earth-energy, he said, just lost. i said, yeah, that makes a lot of sense, thatcher's lot would do that. he said did i know that michael hesiltine is a mason, and i said to him, nah, not him, he's an oddfellow, and the bloke asked if i was taking the piss. kinell, pass us the vino will you, i'm getting a bit dry here. did i tell you about the time i met michael aspel in a public toilet in horsham?

thats fuckin wisdom man

 

[moomoo]

Yeh, right, but what colour does the corduroy sound like?

Obviously brown you fool....

 

[bluestreak]

fucksake jeff, stop jumping, you've knocked me wine all over the dog. we'll never get the stains out.

 

[Santino]

have you ever, like, really looked at your hand?

 

[Dillinger4]

Obviously brown you fool....

man, you are so square. diversssifyyyyyyyyyy man.

 

[MightyAphrodite]

have you ever, like, really looked at your hand?

(sorry it reminded me of a trip to the dentist once...)


a righteous trip.

 

[Dillinger4]

have you ever, like, really looked at your hand?

Its like, this shape, with all these other shapes, and it totally just does stuff when you think about it.

 

[Voley]

(A real conversation I once had with a bloke in Penzance during mushroom season)

If you go off in the woods round Lamorna, I swear to God this is true, there's like fuckin' elves out there. Only they're not made of skin n bone, like, they're made of like little atoms or corpuscles of energy. Know what I mean?

 

[bluestreak]

oh jesus, don't pour salt on the dog, it'll farkin shrivel up.

no wait, that's slugs.

fucking salt the hairy wee git then.

 

[Voley]

Have you ever looked at the word 'the' for a really long time? You should.

It starts to look really weird and you forget how to spell it. Not 'it'. 'The'.

That says something, dunnit?

 

[kyser_soze]

*wakes up*

Wathfusgoinon?

 

[moomoo]

If you go off in the woods round Lamorna, I swear to God this is true, there's like fuckin' elves out there. Only they're not made of skin n bone, like, they're made of like little atoms or corpuscles of energy. Know what I mean?

Worryingly, yes.