'Comedy' fucking tube drivers
- Thread starter Crispy
- Start date
detective-boy said:I'd settle for tube drivers who drive fucking tubes instead of flouncing off on strike at the slightest fucking excuse.
Reckon a few bods would like it if you lot flounced off on strike
The infrastructure of Londons transport network is being undermined by creeping privatisation. No wonder they get the hump.
When I was a kid, you needed a 2:1 to even get an interview to be a tube driver. But it was a job for life. (This was if you were over 21 of course, they had post school entry schemes)
I'd be a bit pissed off to see it all going down the PFI path.
E2A- don't flounce, but plod just retire when they get pissed off, don't they DB?
A letter they don't like ... straight out ... back a couple of days later when a new letter is sent saying what the first one sent but with the words in a different order.cesare said:
A slight technical issue with the deadmans handle ... straight out ... back the following day after an engineer has checked it and said there's no major issue.
No. Course they don't flounce out at the slightest excuse. What AM I thinking ...
Sadly most get pissed off years before they retire, but there is no financially sensible route out (I left with 21 years service and it will cost me £300k if I live till I'm seventy (God forbid ...)), so they just hang around waiting to retire for ten, fifteen, twenty years ...Calva dosser said:
Calva dosser said:
I've known loads of tube drivers ... not one has had a degree ...
girasol
Addicted to handstands!
The Picadilly Line had a driver (I heard him about 5 times) who, although he wasn't trying to be funny, had something funny about his tone of voice, it had a hint of sarcasm with some added cheerfulness on top.
So, he only said the usual stuff, but everyone in the carriage used to grin whenever he spoke
He made 'mind the gap' at Holborn sound hilarious.
So, he only said the usual stuff, but everyone in the carriage used to grin whenever he spoke
He made 'mind the gap' at Holborn sound hilarious.
detective-boy said:A letter they don't like ... straight out ... back a couple of days later when a new letter is sent saying what the first one sent but with the words in a different order.
A slight technical issue with the deadmans handle ... straight out ... back the following day after an engineer has checked it and said there's no major issue.
No. Course they don't flounce out at the slightest excuse. What AM I thinking ...
Fucking unions, eh?
No. Just that one (the RMT and Bob "Mr Reasonable" Crow) at the moment.Poi E said:
I was sharing a picadilly train with loads of countryside alliance people (twas years ago). the driver announced that the station near their march starting point was closed due to overcrowding, next minute adjacent stations were announced closed too. then the train had to wait in a tunnel and he says over the PA "here we are in this dark, enclosed, small tunnel..........just waiting"
i'm suppressing giggles as genuine bumpkins are having genuine claustrophobic fear - although one 'farmer' had his cover blown when his little girl said "is it like this when you go to work, daddy?"
then the driver announces another closure and adds "ok, you win, country people, we won't build on your green fields."
my kind of comedian.
i'm suppressing giggles as genuine bumpkins are having genuine claustrophobic fear - although one 'farmer' had his cover blown when his little girl said "is it like this when you go to work, daddy?"
then the driver announces another closure and adds "ok, you win, country people, we won't build on your green fields."
my kind of comedian.
One which was settled almost instantly, with no checks of all trains, no changes to the equipment or to practices ...Poi E said:
My point is that the RMT do not approach things in a sensible and proportionate way. They fuck off on strike at the slightest thing.
Having suffered innumerable tube strikes, I wish you were fucking right ...Citizen66 said:
I had a comedian driver on 7/7 - I was on the train behind the aldgate bomb. Lights went out and he comes on the speaker and says we'd had a power surge. he then made a joke about how given that we'd just won the olympic bid, we should have all these problems sorted in 5 years.
Unfortunately the 'power problem' was a bomb.
I've had the one on the Vic line that the OP refers to a few times - i quite like him. Yes his jokes are bad, but hes cheerful at least.
Had another one on the northern line last week who urged all his passengers to demand a refund because the 'bastard line controller' had switched the train from a bank to ch x at the last minute
Unfortunately the 'power problem' was a bomb.
I've had the one on the Vic line that the OP refers to a few times - i quite like him. Yes his jokes are bad, but hes cheerful at least.
Had another one on the northern line last week who urged all his passengers to demand a refund because the 'bastard line controller' had switched the train from a bank to ch x at the last minute
Spymaster
Plastic Paddy
There used to be a Central line driver who welcomed new passengers in the style of an airline pilot. He had a few amusing lines:
"The weather at our destination is expected to be ..... pretty much the same as it is here".
"We shall be travelling an an average altitude of about minus 300 feet".
"Sit back, relax, enjoy the entertainment .... those posters were new up this morning".
Amusing the first couple of times.
"The weather at our destination is expected to be ..... pretty much the same as it is here".
"We shall be travelling an an average altitude of about minus 300 feet".
"Sit back, relax, enjoy the entertainment .... those posters were new up this morning".
Amusing the first couple of times.
Jonti
what the dormouse said
Is it 'cos you is innumerate?detective-boy said:
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