I love the sound of the cringey dancing. Make it really difficult, like bodypopping, and tell them they are not getting fed until you have had satisfaction.
I reckon I know exactly what I would cook:
French Onion soup with big croutons topped with gruyere
then, I reckon,
A proper Cassoulet
then for dessert,
Creme Catalana (which is like a Creme Brulee)
And also maybe a selection of cheese.
And excellently selected wine to go with all of it.
And a dessert wine. I have never even had dessert wine.
I have thought about this.
It is definitely the setting that makes a Come Dine With Me winner, IMO. I reckon your dancing could swing it.