Colleagues complaining about you to the boss

Discussion in 'education & employment' started by chilango, Oct 13, 2018.

  1. chilango

    chilango Neither Westminster nor Brussels....

    :mad: and :(

    Over the years this happens every now and again

    I really hate it. It makes me feel like shit.

    You disagree with what I'm doing? Fine. Talk to me

    I make a mistake? Just tell me.

    Don't go running to the boss behind my back.
  2. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    I wouldn't like it.
  3. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    Not exactly the same but I told a funny story to one of our managers last week about something I got up to at the weekend.

    He then told my manager and director, in my company, but then he told the whole factory while they were in the canteen on their lunch break.

    If I had wanted the whole factory to know, I would have told them myself!
  4. maomao

    maomao 四月她爹

    Aren't you going to share the funny story with us?
    miss direct likes this.
  5. danny la rouge

    danny la rouge Without music, life would be a mistake.

    Class traitor pricks. Sorry for your troubles chilango. Solidarity.
    chilango and Sprocket. like this.
  6. weltweit

    weltweit Well-Known Member

    One day, when I have photographic evidence :)
  7. alex_

    alex_ Well-Known Member

    Yes, though a good boss will just say “don’t be a grass - tell them don’t snitch”

    Yossarian likes this.
  8. wiskey

    wiskey Albatross Admirer

    I've had this situation over the past few months at work.

    There was never any question I did anything wrong and nothing has been put on my file and everyone seems to be on my side .. If anything I feel sorry for my accuser because she apparently got caught up in a chain of events that she didn't intend, but if you throw around a word like 'bullying' you can't put it back in the box ... It's been a shit summer really because of it though.
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2018
  9. chilango

    chilango Neither Westminster nor Brussels....

    It hasn't happened that often. But has happened about once in every workplace I've had pretty much.

    In all cases it's not led to anything more than an informal chat with the bosses. So in that sense no harm done.

    On the other it's really demoralising that someone would do that. I try to be friendly and approachable and would always bend over backwards to help colleagues. And yet...somehow manage to provoke this.

    I feel disliked or distrusted or that maybe I'm actually crap at my job. Evidence to the contrary goes out of the window and the toxicity of doubt creeps in.

    Perhaps I should be more resilient? Maybe I should investigate ways to be more assertive or to protect my self-esteem. Or maybe they're right and I am in the wrong line of work. Maybe I should stop being so nice and project more of a "don't fuck with me" persona. But that's not me.

    All of these negative thoughts caused by relatively minor things - a difference of approach perhaps, or poor communication or a momentary mistake.

    Is it just me?
    danny la rouge likes this.
  10. Fozzie Bear

    Fozzie Bear Well-Known Member

    It’s not just you!

    I find what helps is to have other colleagues you can moan to about the grasses.
  11. Chilli.s

    Chilli.s changed the little words

    Has happened to me too, usually by the least professional, and always the ones with loads of chips on shoulders. Wankers.
    chilango likes this.
  12. littleseb

    littleseb littleseb

    fwiw, i do grass's knees for a fiver each.
    danny la rouge, chilango and maomao like this.
  13. Yossarian

    Yossarian free shrugs

    Maybe you could decorate your workplace with some tasteful embroidery.

  14. extra dry

    extra dry Happy to be here

    Just put it down to more training needs in the workplace, 'communication enginering' weekends in nice hotels' far away.
  15. S☼I

    S☼I those funny little plans that never work out right

    Sorry to hear it chilango

    Had this happen to me when I was a TA in an FE college. My immediate supervisor went above HER boss to a member of the SLT about me, so suddenly I was under investigation - but nobody would tell me what for. To this day I don't know. I walked out and never returned, cos fuck that shit.
    space-tout and chilango like this.
  16. equationgirl

    equationgirl Respect my existence or expect my resistance

    I've had it a few times in the past. Usually it seems to result due to their insecurities, but my manager at the time could shitstir with the best, so equally they could have made a throwaway comment.

    No-one ever took me aside and said they'd had a problem with anything I'd done. Sometimes, it's not about you. It's about them deflecting onto you to make themselves themselves feel better.
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2018
    space-tout and S☼I like this.
  17. mrs quoad

    mrs quoad Well-Known Member

    Wife's boss has been reported to social services by her church group.

    IDK, is that sort of similar?
  18. redsquirrel

    redsquirrel This Machine Kills Progressives

  19. Poot

    Poot Everyone's a superhero, everyone's a Captain Kirk

    :hmm: Why?!
  20. mrs quoad

    mrs quoad Well-Known Member

    I think someone seriously asked themselves WWJD.
  21. bellaozzydog

    bellaozzydog rolling turds in glitter

    I accepted along time ago that as long as I'm doing what it says in the contract not to give a fuck about the job, and certainly don't let anything generated by the job affect my mental health. Snitches and back stabbers in the workplace inevitably are the most woeful human beings and envious haters. Hopefully management see this and just ignore it.

    Keep being friendly and approachable and help other colleagues. The universe always balances shit out and pays back. You are on the winning team you just need to keep reminding yourself:D:D:D:thumbs::thumbs::thumbs::thumbs:

    If they keep doing it kill them with a chainsaw
    MickiQ likes this.
  22. Kesher

    Kesher 이달의 소녀 Banned

    Some bosses encourage it. Particularly vulnerable to this are agency/contract workers

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