I think you are talking out of your backside old boy.
I coach several different age groups football, from Year 1 to Year 6. They can really seriously get it out of proportion - losing an end-of-session training game which means nothing as soon as it is over (to us, as coaches) can clearly seem like the end of the world to them.
If you think young children don't like playing outside and don't like competitive games you clearly have nothing whatsoever to do with children and are taking your opinions from the Daily Mail or the pub or summat because it's all been middle-aged tory cliches so far.
In fact if you want to get back to cars, I'll get on my football coach's soapbox and tell you that one reason I think we produce fewer instinctively brilliant footballers these days in England is that street football no longer exists. Only 40 years ago I played and learnt my football playing on the street. There was a street in Stockwell where I used to see kids playing on the road until about 10 years ago (Tradescant Rd if anyone knows it - the bit with no house doors, just the garage and garden walls) - I used to point them out to people and ask them when did you last see that? But that's gone now, haven't seen it for years. There are - guess what! - cars parked nose-to-tail on both sides. Wicked games they were too - 10 a side played
across the road - the pitch was 10 times as wide as long, talk about encouraging wingplay! Also, if you couldn't control the ball, turn and pull a trick and beat a man or two, you were going no where - the space was tiny. Plus there was a brilliant strand of street-bragging oneupmanship for the coolest trick, which took some nerve sometimes, cause if you failed or fell over you would be laughed out for the next 10 minutes.
As a pedestrian, you kind of had to run the gauntlet to get through them. Or saunter the gauntlet as we did, felt it was a bit undignified to scurry away from kids you know. Give them a moody stare if the ball hit you

.
Where do kids learn football now? In back gardens with their Dads, or in controlled and organised sessions with FA approved drills...none of them replicate the chaos and craziness of the real game in the way the street game does.