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Brockwell Lido - chat, news and more


The Brockwell bit is easily the least OTT. The bit above contains some ùber Guardianese:

'Sometimes, I take words into the water. I run Swillowing workshops, where swimmers are given a Wind In The Willows persona to embody as they enter the water, afterwards recording their experiences as rats, moles and moorhens'


radio eros
Hope they'll do some repairs over the winter. I've never seen it so busy in the early morning but I've also never seen the pool and poolside in such a bad state either.


Well-Known Member
I still can't book classes on the piece of shit that is the Lido app despite complaining three times.
I queued 3 times to get it sorted only for it to break again within a few days. No one is bothering to book anymore - it's a free-for-all at the classes. The woman at reception was apologetic but didn't seem to think there was any resolution in sight. I expect like everything else it will take months and months to fix.


Well-Known Member
The water is clearer - the filters appear to have been turned on. However, there is a lot of rubbish on the pool floor which it really shouldn't be too hard to collect. I swam at Pells Pool at the weekend and the lifeguards there were constantly skimming the pool with nets for debris. I never see that at Brockwell.

Amongst this week's poolside debris was nitrous oxide canisters. Alongside the 2 pieces of underwire from a bra - this is my best rubbish find so far. Although I did dive down to investigate a strange creature at the bottom of the deep-end. I couldn't work out what it was but it turned out to be the stalks from a bunch of grapes which had become entwined with hair and plastic creating a weird urban sea-creature scuttling along the pool floor.
They struggle to even maintain life guards given the low wage they pay them.

My favourite brockwell lido find this summer was a clip bag of unidentifiable white powder in the deep end of lane 1.


Well-Known Member
So in all fairness - yesterday the pool was looking remarkably clean and clear. The debris on the pool base seems to have been cleared up and the majority of the algae has been dealt with. I imagine that it helps that there has been a relatively quiet few weeks. I hope they can keep it clean.

In other news Beckenham Place Park is reopening tomorrow:

"We would like to say a big Thank You for all your support over the last month.

We can finally say that we will be Open tomorrow morning (18th August) from 7am to 6pm

All you need to do is go to the Purple Tent to enter. There is an entry fee to gain access to the area this will be £3 for adults and £2 for Children, under 3's go free.

Paddle Area - is still closed for the moment

Swimming - Will be running throughout the day split down in to 2 hour sessions;

7am to 9 am
9:15 to 11:15
11:30 to 13:30
13:45 to 15:45
16:00 to 18:00

With the paddle area being closed we will only be able to accept those 8 years + to go swimming. Due to safety re-evaluations everyone will be required to wear tow floats in the lake. Don't worry though as these will be provided in your entry fee, if you have one at home you are always welcome to bring that along as well.

Boat Hire - Will be running in the pontoon end of the lake all day, you can still hire boats from 2 years +. You will still need to go to the Purple tent to hire either canoe or paddle board, this is where you will be issued a wrist band which you show to our staff running boat hire.

All Sessions will have a 15 minute warning and will be cleared by then end of session time to allow staff to reset the area between sessions.

Pre-booked Swims - Those of you that opted for swim passes the duty manager on site will have a list, Please bring your original booking email with you as well.

Many Thanks"


Well-Known Member
On the other hand the app on my phone has broken again - 4th time now. I've called in but there only seem to be a handful of people who can fix it and they always seem to be on a break when I get there.


I don't think that's really new management as when the 400 Rabbits in Crystal Palace opened I was told it was owned by the people who own the Lido Cafe...
I did hear that it was within the same group as before, but it's new staff, new decor, new menu... They honour the old swimmers loyalty cards though!


AKA some / certain posters
What's the current state of the gym and spa at the Lido? I've heard complaints that it's a bit grubby.


New Member

Start your 2020 fitness with the Brockwell Swimmers club. Water Polo is played every Monday evening at Alleyn’s School and Swim Sessions every Tuesday evening at JAGs Sports Club. As usual the first trial session is FREE and members can also claim a free session if they introduce a friend.

More details on our Water Polo and Swim Session shopping pages. Happy New Year and hope to see you in the pool.