Urban75 Home About Offline BrixtonBuzz Contact

Biggest/Shittest bonus ever?

spring-peeper said:
I worked in a call center. They keep stats on call-flow, length of time per call, amount sold (doesn't count if they ask for it), if you said the correct propaganda - that sort of thing.

Helping the customer and giving the correct information was a small, small part.
Click to expand...

ithangyew :)
 
christ, working for the NHS we get fuck all ... well, except the empty promises from management! :hmm:

the only thing we get is more bloody work! :mad:
 
Again - in the city - a Japanese company. Our 12 month's worth of salary had one month taken off - so our monthly pay package was 11 months divided by 12 (if that make sense). Then twice a year we'd get half the extra month given to us as a "bonus".

Ie not a bonus at all - just a month's pay withheld and given 2x yearly in a lump sum. :mad:
 
10 years ago I used to work for a sports management company. One Christmas I picked the heaviest (wrapped) present I could find out of the Santa's sack and found it was a 3 year old hardback biog of Nick Faldo (yawn). :(

My colleague then picked the lightest thing, and got a really nice Adidas shirt signed by Tim Henman. :)
 
Back in the early 80's the 'powers-that-be' asked our union rep what's the least they could give us as a Christmas bonus, she told them anything under £50 would be an insult.

They gave us £50 and taxed it!
 
zygote said:
Back in the early 80's the 'powers-that-be' asked our union rep what's the least they could give us as a Christmas bonus, she told them anything under £50 would be an insult.

They gave us £50 and taxed it!
Click to expand...

The government taxed it. Not your company.. Geezus... :rolleyes:
 
Kanda said:
The government taxed it. Not your company.. Geezus... :rolleyes:
Click to expand...
They put it through the books is what they did........th'unts

Nice to see the word government instead of 'taxpayers' money which most people seem to be banging on about these days :D
 
RubyBlue said:
Same as me - a 'thanks for your hard work' email is it :mad:
Click to expand...

hey, funnily enough we get too - a "thanks for all your hard work"

the boss then comes around with some warmed up mincey pies - cue mutterings of "it will take more than that to make up for all the sh*t we have to put up with all year!"

we do get a 1/2 day xmas shop off from the boss

plus on the last day we usually pile off to the pub for lunch then come back, the boss wanders around at about 2pm and tell us to finish whatever we're doing and get off, so means we do bank a full day

... small mercies huh? I'd prefer a big wodge of cash anyday!

... doesn't matter anyway as I'll be off in a month ahahahahahahaha
 
Best was about £120.00 a few years ago. Worst was a diary with the words "A World of Thanks" embossed on it.

Now we get £25.00 worth of M&S or HMV vouchers which is okay. Oh and an extra day's holiday for "Christmas Shopping" which we have to take between 20th November and 20th December - most welcome as I have generally used up my holiday allowance by then!
 
Working in a pre school I don't get any cash bonus but every Christmas/leavers time I tend to get about 30 boxes of chocolates.:D Though the majority tend to be bloody seashell ones.:(

We have had discussions at small group time about how much I like wine and vodka but the little buggers don't seem to be passing it on to their parents.:mad:

When I was a nanny my charges parents gave me a trip to lapland as a wedding present and £500 spending money which was nice.
 
Best bonus was this year when I got $20,000 worth of stock. Can't cash it in for another two years though, but it's already worth over $30,000; bottom-of-a-recession-bonus WIN! :cool:
 
I received a 2 pence piece once, through the post!

It was my final wages for the final day or so I left one of my first jobs minus holiday, minus student loan and NI tax etc.

It cost them 25p to send the letter. Epic fail.
 
Best was €4k and a hamper which was very nice. Worst was many years of fuck all in the public sector ( and last year in the private sector).
 
Best was £500 before tax, from a well known international media for passing my accountancy exams in the mid-90s. Worst was a bottle of undrinkable wine and I mean undrinkable medium sweet South African paint stripper which must have cost all of £3.99 from the local corner shop and the manager who gave us the wine then claimed it back on expenses.
 
I don't know which is worse. 3 years in the public sector with zero christmas bonus. Or the £6.50 christmas bonus given to me by SA Brain (a Welsh brewery) when I worked in a pub.

I formally rejected it by sending it back to them as cash. Greedy fucking cunts they are.
 
Best X-mas bonuses was when I worked in kitchens. I'd usually go home on X-mas Eve with a turkey, a dozen cans of beer, a few bottles of wine/spirits and about £50.

Got decent annual cash bonus when I worked for a bank but the kitchen ones meant much more at the time.

Don't get fuck all in my current job. (mind you someone from another office bought me a box of Roses as a thank you for something I'd done for them :))
 
We got a bonus, in return for signing a new contract with shitty long hours and wild fluctuations in shift patterns, after a year. An " annualised retention bonus".
Fucking thing got paid on the first month of the tax year so fucked up my tax code, got taxed out of existence anyway and pushed me "above the ceiling" to qualify for Tax Credits. :mad:
 
I nicked a video projector from work and got £200 for it (they were quite state-of-the-art 15 years ago). And about £50 for every VCR.

Best "official" bonus was £1200 Profit Related Pay for the last firm I ever worked for, about 10 years ago.

But the most appreciated are the M&S Christmas hampers one of my favourite customers send me as a thank-you every year. They're not really my thing (I'm teetotal so I end up giving the port away) but they're only a small family run firm, they don't have to do it and it's a really nice gesture.
 
We're told that "you don't get a bonus for doing your job well". Oh rlly. :hmm: What the fuck do you get bonuses for then? And why doesn't it apply to senior managers as well? :mad:

No bonuses for anyone this year. :(
 
We get a performance related bonus which counts has part of our wages.
So if you get a bonus it doesn't matter what it is unless it's otherwise stated your entitled to it weekly,monthly or yearly or whatever.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

P
Men - have you ever been sexually harrassed at work?
2 3 4 5
Replies
127
Views
7K
Hollis
Hollis
Cloo
Anyone else being stalked by Monday.com?
Replies
16
Views
560
Boris Sprinkler
Boris Sprinkler
A
Alternative perks to maternity/paternity for non-parent employees? Sabbatical?
2 3 4 5 6
Replies
174
Views
2K
Dystopiary
Dystopiary
A
Can anyone explain difference between Advanced Learner Loan and Student Loans, please?
Replies
3
Views
628
Mike_eub
M
trashpony
Student finance/loans etc
Replies
19
Views
840
maomao
maomao
Back
Top Bottom