Bidets - genius or a continental perversion?

[Madusa]

There are way too many gems of quotes on this thread for this thread to ever disappear!

 

[poster342002]

I think they're rather good meself. As long as you're not staying at someone elses and you drunkenly confuse it with the loo

Everyone I've ever known who's seen a bidet for the first time has an anecdote about that.

 

[Disaster]

I feel like a tit when using them but they are a good invention.

 

[London_Calling]

I don't think I've seen any with hot and cold options, never mind a mixer - you'd think they would given the nature of the intimacy and the fact that everything else in the bathroom that comes into contact with you skin does - or am I weirding out here?

 

[Madusa]

They usually have mixer taps dont they?

 

[cyberfairy]

We had a bidet in Australia as they seem to come as standard and the only way it was ever used was for the cat to sleep in it.

 

[dessiato]

They usually have mixer taps dont they?

Mine in this apartment doesn't. It has two 'normal' taps so you have to put a plug in and fill it rather like a sink/basin. In the apartment in Porto all three had mixers.

Our toilets at work all have bidets.

 

[jontz01]

I bet they're good for a wank.

 

[Cloo]

My parents used to have one. Handy for cleaning yr feetz.

 

[ATOMIC SUPLEX]

I have one but have never used it. I'm not sure how the tap bit goes up your bum on mine.

 

[GarfieldLeChat]

what's wrogn with your left hand? and washing throughly afterwards?

 

[vipper]

One prefers to wash one's arse with water. Not wipe it with paper.

Doesn't that lead to inconvenient chapping?

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

Our toilets at work all have bidets.

Where do you work: a bordello?

 

[vipper]

Where do you work: a bordello?

Quote of the aeon.

 

[Cloud]

I'd like one

Save a fortune on bog rolls plus if you have ever had piles you will know how painfull it is to wipe your ass.

 

[marty21]

I recall reading once that having a dump when you have a hairy arse is like dropping a slice of bread loaded with peanut butter face down on a shag pile carpet.

 

[dessiato]

Where do you work: a bordello?

No, a private school as a 'profesor' of English.

 

[fractionMan]

The last time I used a bidet it was to defrost a christmas turkey.

 

[8ball]

I've never used a bidet - not seen one in a bathroom since I was a child and didn't even know what it was for back then.

I'd try just about anything once, though.

 

[mrsfran]

I love them when you're on holiday - perfect for cleaning sand off your feet. It feels a bit wrong to squat over them though. Plus, how do you dry yourself off aftwards?

 

[soulman]

Doesn't that lead to inconvenient chapping?

Not at all, dear boy. One has a team of Cornish 'sluts' to dab one's arse dry. Using the finest Egyptian cotton towels.

 

[vipper]

Not at all, dear boy. One has a team of Cornish 'sluts' to dab one's arse dry. Using the finest Egyptian cotton towels.

I didn't realise you received a cluster of bikini clad cornish ladies with every bidet bought.

*orders 4 from b&q online*

 

[Johnny Canuck3]

The last time I used a bidet it was to defrost a christmas turkey.

That's sort of like putting a turkey in the toilet to defrost.