Bartending

[Jazzz]

The funniest bartender-customer altercation I saw was when this woman accused my mate of short changing her. She was this well-educated Australian lady out on the town with her bf and her mates, and all the time she had the money in her hand, she counted it and vociferously argued with him for ages that it was the wrong change, but she was a bit drunk and was just a complete twat so she actually believed that it was the wrong change - must have been shit at maths or something, she was being all high and mighty and said something derogatory about him due to his lower class status and general ruffian look, so he replied with something like "well what about you, you must be stupid, you must be absolutely shit at maths, what's ewrong with you, you can't even count?" he got a right semi-bollocking off the manager for saying that... but couldn't really fault him as he'd taken a load of shit from someone when he hadn't done anything wrong...

Funniest one I had was when a woman came up to the bar and asked for me.

"I'm not happy about the music. Can you get the DJ to change it?"

I said I'm sorry madam but I'm afraid there was absolutely nothing I could do. (let's note that the DJ in question was a black guy).

"Well I'm really not happy about it. I'd like to complain to the manager"

"Sure"

You should have seen her face when I pointed her towards the DJ

 

[Herbsman.]

why's his blackness important?

 

[red rose]

On wednesday I was put on the overflow bar cos we were really busy, it was just me and an agency guy who kept getting crap from customers. He had two little twats come up with laminated passes (NOT VIP) who were demanding free drinks. He asked me to handle it because they wouldn't leave and we are completely cut off from the main bar and supervisors.

So I went over and asked what was going on and they said that because of their passes I had to give them two free bottles of cider and two tequila shots. So I told them that no, I didn't have to give them anything free and they got annoyed and said that yes I did blah blah blah VIP etc. So I told them that my manager had not told me that I could give anyone free drinks and that they were welcome to go up to the VIP lounge and get their free drinks there.

They said "we want your managers name" so I told them and even gave them a pen and paper to write it down and offered to spell it for them. Then they said "whilst we're waiting we'll pay for two bottles of cider" so I asked them for ID (totally justified, they looked about ten, but you should have seen their faces) They were both just over 18 so I poured their two ciders without taking my eye off them for a second in case they decided to walk off without paying.

Then they tried to pay by card so I politely informed them that there was a minimum £10 spend on cards and they got really angry and ordered tequila to make it up to £10. Then they stood by the bar, missing the gig, for 10 or 15 minutes scowling and generally attempting to be intimidating, and failed miserably.

Dickheads.

 

[Dovydaitis]

people who wave notes at you, i just assumed it was a tip, ripped it out their hands and placed it on the back of the bar and went on to serve someone else.

for some reason, they didnt do it very often after that!

i miss bar work

 

[Dovydaitis]

On wednesday I was put on the overflow bar cos we were really busy, it was just me and an agency guy who kept getting crap from customers. He had two little twats come up with laminated passes (NOT VIP) who were demanding free drinks. He asked me to handle it because they wouldn't leave and we are completely cut off from the main bar and supervisors.

So I went over and asked what was going on and they said that because of their passes I had to give them two free bottles of cider and two tequila shots. So I told them that no, I didn't have to give them anything free and they got annoyed and said that yes I did blah blah blah VIP etc. So I told them that my manager had not told me that I could give anyone free drinks and that they were welcome to go up to the VIP lounge and get their free drinks there.

They said "we want your managers name" so I told them and even gave them a pen and paper to write it down and offered to spell it for them. Then they said "whilst we're waiting we'll pay for two bottles of cider" so I asked them for ID (totally justified, they looked about ten, but you should have seen their faces) They were both just over 18 so I poured their two ciders without taking my eye off them for a second in case they decided to walk off without paying.

Then they tried to pay by card so I politely informed them that there was a minimum £10 spend on cards and they got really angry and ordered tequila to make it up to £10. Then they stood by the bar, missing the gig, for 10 or 15 minutes scowling and generally attempting to be intimidating, and failed miserably.

Dickheads.

tequilla looks surprisingly like piss.........

 

[hektik]

i can't believe that some people try all of these things - mental.

the only thing that irritates me about bars is when they are obviously busy, but are too tight to have enough people serving behind the bar.

i've never had that much trouble being served: being tall, you tend to get noticed pretty quickly when standing there, plus i don't do all the wanky "waving tenners" type of things: jsut make eye contact, smile, amybe a nod of the head, and wait patiently while finishing off the last of your beer.

 

[Roadkill]

the only thing that irritates me about bars is when they are obviously busy, but are too tight to have enough people serving behind the bar.

Where Dovy and I worked used to be great for that. The manager worked on the theory that, since most of his staff were students, there would always be someone who had other things to do besides work. As a result, he'd put on staff enough to cover a busy night, and if it turned out quiet there'd always be someone who was happy to go off early. It was a good system, and he was a bloody good manager. Then he got ill and left, and the fuckwits took over. It wasn't nearly such a good place to work after that...

 

[rhod]

People who order a Guinness at the end of a round - fuck off.

People who order one drink and refuse to tell you the next one until you've made the first in case you get it wrong - fuck off.

People who yell at non-contract bar staff -who have no control over anything - about the prices/selection/decor - fuck off.

People who say "a glass of white wine please" and then say "oi, do I look cheap?!" when you pour a glass of house white because they didn't specify - fuck off.

People who ask you to put a bit extra in the glass and get pissed off when you point to the two cameras that are focussed on you and explain that you will lose your job for it - fuck off.

People who get their change and go "he's next" and point to their mate - fuck off.

When a bar is packed with queuing customers and extra members of staff come onto the bar to help ease the queues to stop you having to wait so long and, since they aren't psychic, serve someone else before you even though you were there first do you tut/mutter to your friend/kick off? Then you can fuck off.

When everyone else is winding down for christmas and going out to get smashed at their christmas parties we are working 60 or 70 hour weeks into the small hours serving said smashed arseholes at said christmas parties, we do not deserve to be treated like this

red rose, for this and all sorts of other bullshit you have to put up with from "the great British public" can I just offer a sincere thank-you. I've never done bar work, but it looks bloody hard and I don't think I'd have the patience or stamina for it.

 

[Santino]

*waves tenner about*

 

[Xanadu]

People who get their change and go "he's next" and point to their mate - fuck off.

Got to say, people most often do that when someone's been waiting ages and hasn't been served. In fact, I've never seen someone do it to their mate.

 

[Jazzz]

why's his blackness important?

Actually 'his blackness' would be a very good description of Robert B******d! He'd often get customers who would simply not consider him authoritative due to his colour, and he'd allow them to think that and a confrontation to develop. It's very likely that was the case here, and 'I get that all the time' was his remark after that incident.

 

[DG55]

I work part-time in a Belgian Bar in Barcelona and although most of the customers are ok, there's about 50 different Belgian beers on offer and they all have their own fucking glasses to be served in.

Which bar is this? Any good?

 

[1927]

Can I add to the list people who complain about the size of the head on their pint? They are well annoying and fuckwitted. And usually wrong.

How are they wrong? If they want a smaller or larger head surely that is up to them!

 

[spacemonkey]

I always got pissed off working with the hot blonde barmaid. Sure, she was great to look at, but she was slow, absolutely useless at pouring pints and would get £30+ a night of drinks bought for her....whilst I'd get nowt!



I used to flip out at rude customers all the time, I got sent home twice because of it! Mainly when people assumed I was stupid because I worked in a pub.

 

[Herbsman.]

Actually 'his blackness' would be a very good description of Robert B******d! He'd often get customers who would simply not consider him authoritative due to his colour, and he'd allow them to think that and a confrontation to develop. It's very likely that was the case here, and 'I get that all the time' was his remark after that incident.

Ah I see what you mean now.

 

[Herbsman.]

...people assumed I was stupid because I worked in a pub.

I think that's why my mate must have given that Australian woman the wrong change... a thicko wot works in a pub surely couldn't be right, and she, an intelligent high-flying middle class person couldn't possibly have made a mistake

 

[Wolveryeti]

How are they wrong? If they want a smaller or larger head surely that is up to them!

Normally they are too pissed/thick to realise that the pint mark is below the rim of the glass.

In any case, quibbling over a few teaspoons of beer is pretty pathetic, unless the barperson is a real n00b and gets it badly wrong.

 

[geminisnake]

customers who wave notes at you or click their fingers - i'm not blind and you're not next. first up against the wall come the revolution

My daughter always used to ignore anyone that did this to her

I'm not sure I have the temprament for bar tending.

 

[johnnymarrsbars]

People who order a Guinness at the end of a round - fuck off.

People who order one drink and refuse to tell you the next one until you've made the first in case you get it wrong - fuck off.

People who yell at non-contract bar staff -who have no control over anything - about the prices/selection/decor - fuck off.

People who say "a glass of white wine please" and then say "oi, do I look cheap?!" when you pour a glass of house white because they didn't specify - fuck off.

People who ask you to put a bit extra in the glass and get pissed off when you point to the two cameras that are focussed on you and explain that you will lose your job for it - fuck off.

People who get their change and go "he's next" and point to their mate - fuck off.

When a bar is packed with queuing customers and extra members of staff come onto the bar to help ease the queues to stop you having to wait so long and, since they aren't psychic, serve someone else before you even though you were there first do you tut/mutter to your friend/kick off? Then you can fuck off.

When everyone else is winding down for christmas and going out to get smashed at their christmas parties we are working 60 or 70 hour weeks into the small hours serving said smashed arseholes at said christmas parties, we do not deserve to be treated like this

(((OP)))

i worked in a pub once...for about 5 hours then walked out because of a lot of those reasons. fuck bar work.

 

[1927]

I used to love bar work when I did it, but the diea of even getting that side of a bar fills me with dread and I can't for the life of me work out how I managed to do it for so long!

 

[trevhagl]

People who order a Guinness at the end of a round - fuck off.

People who order one drink and refuse to tell you the next one until you've made the first in case you get it wrong - fuck off.

People who yell at non-contract bar staff -who have no control over anything - about the prices/selection/decor - fuck off.

People who say "a glass of white wine please" and then say "oi, do I look cheap?!" when you pour a glass of house white because they didn't specify - fuck off.

People who ask you to put a bit extra in the glass and get pissed off when you point to the two cameras that are focussed on you and explain that you will lose your job for it - fuck off.

People who get their change and go "he's next" and point to their mate - fuck off.

When a bar is packed with queuing customers and extra members of staff come onto the bar to help ease the queues to stop you having to wait so long and, since they aren't psychic, serve someone else before you even though you were there first do you tut/mutter to your friend/kick off? Then you can fuck off.

When everyone else is winding down for christmas and going out to get smashed at their christmas parties we are working 60 or 70 hour weeks into the small hours serving said smashed arseholes at said christmas parties, we do not deserve to be treated like this

What about student cunts who wait till the busiest time them want to pay for drinks by credit card, so the barman/maid has to go looking for the machine to process it

 

[fogbat]

What about student cunts who wait till the busiest time them want to pay for drinks by credit card, so the barman/maid has to go looking for the machine to process it

It's lucky that non-students and graduates never use credit cards, isn't it?


Worst thing is definitely the pricks waving notes.

Oh, I'm so sorry, sir. I didn't realise that you were capable of paying for your drinks! If I'd known, I'd have served you straight away.

On the customer side, I've got a pet-hate for people who just stand at the bar, when the pub's busy. You've been served, now get out of the way.

 

[Kameron]

I used to love bar work when I did it, but the diea of even getting that side of a bar fills me with dread and I can't for the life of me work out how I managed to do it for so long!

Same here, I had five solid years behind the bar, redrose nails the bad parts of sure but I know that somewhere I loved it. Thought obviously not to much, I don't have any dreams of retiring to run such a place for example.

 

[Woollyredhat]

*waves tenner about*

*robs tenner

 

[stupid kid]

I work at my SU. It holds 1800 people on a club night, there are about 16 barstaff behind the taps (few more on the shots only bars). Every stupid cunt in the place decides they fancy a snakebite at about 11:30ish and then gets shitty when it takes 15 minutes to get served. WTF? There are how many of you waving your banknotes at how many of us? Figure it out, it's gonna take a while. Everyone behind the bar is working as hard as they fucking can.

Seriously pisses me off, and we now get paid minimum wage for the pleasure of working in the busiest place I've ever seen.

 

[Kaye]

People who order a Guinness at the end of a round - fuck off.

People who order one drink and refuse to tell you the next one until you've made the first in case you get it wrong - fuck off.

People who yell at non-contract bar staff -who have no control over anything - about the prices/selection/decor - fuck off.

People who say "a glass of white wine please" and then say "oi, do I look cheap?!" when you pour a glass of house white because they didn't specify - fuck off.

People who ask you to put a bit extra in the glass and get pissed off when you point to the two cameras that are focussed on you and explain that you will lose your job for it - fuck off.

People who get their change and go "he's next" and point to their mate - fuck off.

When a bar is packed with queuing customers and extra members of staff come onto the bar to help ease the queues to stop you having to wait so long and, since they aren't psychic, serve someone else before you even though you were there first do you tut/mutter to your friend/kick off? Then you can fuck off.

When everyone else is winding down for christmas and going out to get smashed at their christmas parties we are working 60 or 70 hour weeks into the small hours serving said smashed arseholes at said christmas parties, we do not deserve to be treated like this

This is a new one.

 

[Kaye]

I've done my fair share of bar work. It's shit. Get over it.

 

[trevhagl]

I've done my fair share of bar work. It's shit. Get over it.

It was ok when i was on afternoon shifts so i got paid for talking to alkies.

 

[red rose]

I actually occasionally miss working in a pub rather than a bar at a venue, you don't get to talk to the regulars (there are no regulars). On the other hand you don't have all the local crap to deal with and you can usually just get on with serving and not have to mess about.

I do realise how easy I have it compared to some, I get more than minimum wage and a cab home paid for by my employer if I work after midnight, plus I get to see the acts that perform (not always a perk) and theres usually a very friendly party atmosphere amongst the staff. But at the same time we have no regular shifts, its just working when you're needed with no garuntee of any shifts at all and often on short notice. We also often get customers being nasty because they expect a lot of things they would get in a pub (like hot drinks and snacks) which we can't provide and on sell out nights we have about ten times as many customers as your average pub (admittedly we'll have more staff but its still pretty intimidating to see)

Most of the time I do enjoy it or I wouldn't do it but recently I've been working every hour of the day at christmas party-type things and gigs that just seem to attract the ruder more annoying customers and I snapped

Its good that I've got a break between christmas and new year, all the staff that are working new years are doing a 12 hour shift starting at 6pm on new years eve and again on new years day