View Full Version : Recommend a really trashy holiday for twisted kitten
Braps!
Twisted Kitten (me and my dj life partner) want to go on tour towards the middle/end of September i.e. when the school holidays are over. Our tastes are simple. We want somewhere that's going to be hot, where the living is relatively cheap. We aren't bothered about history or site seeing beyond the shops or nearest beach. We basically want to laze by the pool or sea and eat, drink, read and chillax. Somewhere with crazy golf, a waterpark and a theme park would be a total bonus.
SO! Where would you recommend that's going to fit the bill and that we could get last minute and hopefully cheap-ish? We don't want to be travelling too much either - we went to Greece last year and that was a bit of trek to be honest :D
I eagerly await top tips to places like Magluf or Majorca! I'm serious now....
We aren't bothered about history or site seeing beyond the shops or nearest beach.
I love you :D
I can't really help but I have to say that the one package holiday I've ever been on featured pirate ships, food fights, an "arabian nights" evening out with belly dancers, a camel, a horse and a man balancing chairs on his chin and finally a cabaret night with trannies and everything!
It was cultural rape but I'm not sure who's culture was getting abused more :D :o :( :confused:
Don't go to Magaluf - it's funny for about an hour and the spaniards hate everyone.
Playa Den Bosa - Ibiza.
Water Park just behind Space Nightclub, Crazy Golf down the road, water sports and bars/clubs/beaches of varying *noise* levels.
I got return flights out there last week, booked a week before for about 100 quid. Plenty of cheap apts too.
Now see...despite everything I've said above, we are slightly snobbish, but terrible inverted snobs which prob makes us worse than proper travel snobs/bores who want their mind expanded *yawn*
We're really not bovvered about nightlife/clubbing cos we do that on a fairly regular basis here. Also, being stuck in a hotel with lots of 18-30's binge drinking, simulated sex games type holiday makers fills us with dread. :o
I guess what we actually really want is somewhere a bit family friendly that's going to have a few attractions like water parks an' that but well, in term time a little light on the kids.
Dubversion
05-07-2007, 09:45
somewhere in the south of Italy? Sorrento or something? not clubby but gorgeous..
Eurodisney???
Wierdly enough, Eurodisney is Plan B if we don't have a beach holiday :D
I could so see you two at Eurodisney :D
Minnie_the_Minx
05-07-2007, 10:00
What about Cyprus?
Minnie_the_Minx
05-07-2007, 10:01
or Malta
Not somewhere that appeals to me and I'm not sure how warm it'll be in September
What about Cyprus?
Tell me more - is it still going to beach/pool weather in September? Do lots of people speak english? How long does it take to get there? Will lots of crazy foreigners try to abduct a pair of ladies into the white slave trade? ;)
We're really not bovvered about nightlife/clubbing cos we do that on a fairly regular basis here. Also, being stuck in a hotel with lots of 18-30's binge drinking, simulated sex games type holiday makers fills us with dread. :o
Which is why I said Playa Den Bossa, not San Antonio. Very different to each other. PDB is on the other side of the Island from the cesspit that is San An.
Tell me more - is it still going to beach/pool weather in September? Do lots of people speak english? How long does it take to get there? Will lots of crazy foreigners try to abduct a pair of ladies into the white slave trade? ;)
Cyprus is beautiful and will be hot! The beaches are lovely!!
It is a 4 hour flight though, dunno if that puts you off?
Ermm I got my drink spiked by a PR out there, but this *was* Aiya Napa so not a very family place.
They have bug bugs there as well though! *shudder*
Minnie_the_Minx
05-07-2007, 10:12
Tell me more - is it still going to beach/pool weather in September? Do lots of people speak english? How long does it take to get there? Will lots of crazy foreigners try to abduct a pair of ladies into the white slave trade? ;)
I don't know, I've never been there :D
cancun.
Hurrican season is Aug-Oct , so you can usually get AI deals. direct flight on Tui or the like
its apalling erstatz mexican lite for US college kids and pasty faced mancunians.
You can have an all you can eat steak BarBQ on a pirate ship cruise with suitabily mocked up crew or hang at Dennys & the Hard Rock Cafe.YOu can drink mexican beers in mocked up Bodegas and wear a Mexican hat, whils en Maricachi band plays beatless songs for yout entertainment
There is no culture to speak of, just miles & miles of strip hotels with malls selling Tat & BoB Marley Paraphenaleia for spring break college kids.
Its great/Its shit/Its not Mexico
Its cheap.
or Malta
Not somewhere that appeals to me and I'm not sure how warm it'll be in September
No no no.
Tiny overcrowded beaches and a serious litter problem across the entire island. Plus you can smell the sewage plant from most of the island as its only a tiny place.
If you want a holiday where you don't leave the hotal and the hotal pool at all then fine. Otherwise avoid like the plague.
Tell me more - is it still going to beach/pool weather in September? Do lots of people speak english? How long does it take to get there? Will lots of crazy foreigners try to abduct a pair of ladies into the white slave trade? ;)
Cyprus is spot on in September. Its still so hot that you can't walk barefoot on pavement. Anyone who goes in june or august is mad because its like living inside a bakery oven switched to 11 (in spinal tap stylee).
The beaches are nice. The people are lovely.
Its further than Greece though and I thought they wanted somewhere near.
They have bug bugs there as well though! *shudder*
Aye they do have wasps the size of helicopters. I'd forgotten about that.
Best Icecream I've ever tasted too though which balances it out.
Different areas of Cyprus have different feels and different groups.
There are some areas full of mainly english and some full of mainly swedish etc.
There are areas for those into the rave scene and more family areas too.
Minnie_the_Minx
05-07-2007, 10:31
No no no.
Tiny overcrowded beaches and a serious litter problem across the entire island. Plus you can smell the sewage plant from most of the island as its only a tiny place.
If you want a holiday where you don't leave the hotal and the hotal pool at all then fine. Otherwise avoid like the plague.
I did say it's not somewhere that appeals to me :p
It sounds like hell
Minnie_the_Minx
05-07-2007, 10:32
What about the Algarve?
I did say it's not somewhere that appeals to me :p
It sounds like hell
Worst place I've ever visited and I've been to Milton Keynes!
I have to say Malta is a bit shit - although in my quest for a less built up beach I found a lovely nudist/gay beach which was beautiful and v out the way as I don't think it's legal to sunbathe nude there.
I was there for work though so didn't really get to explore much on my own.
Dubversion
05-07-2007, 10:58
I know you said no to Greece, but some of Rhodes is lovely (if you ignore Faliraki).. Lindos is gorgeous... and you can fly (cheap) straight into Rhodes.
then if you do want activity stuff, Faliraki isn't too far..
May Kasahara
05-07-2007, 12:14
cancun.
Hurrican season is Aug-Oct , so you can usually get AI deals. direct flight on Tui or the like
its apalling erstatz mexican lite for US college kids and pasty faced mancunians.
You can have an all you can eat steak BarBQ on a pirate ship cruise with suitabily mocked up crew or hang at Dennys & the Hard Rock Cafe.YOu can drink mexican beers in mocked up Bodegas and wear a Mexican hat, whils en Maricachi band plays beatless songs for yout entertainment
There is no culture to speak of, just miles & miles of strip hotels with malls selling Tat & BoB Marley Paraphenaleia for spring break college kids.
Its great/Its shit/Its not Mexico
Its cheap.
This is so true. Well done zoltan for a perfect evocation of place.
This is so true. Well done zoltan for a perfect evocation of place.
:D
ChrisFilter
05-07-2007, 12:24
Turkey gets good reviews.. I'm honeymooning there in the 50c heat.
We're staying somewhere that looks really nice, small vine covered hotel, orchard, nice swimming pool area, only 40 rooms, near to Oludeniz (Blue Lagoon), etc, etc. All in it was £500 and gets fantastic reviews on holidaywatchdog.com :cool:
My ex won a holiday to Cancun and took her friend and not me as she'd only just met me (I'm still bitter).
She enjoyed the holiday but at the same time said it was shit.
Food was rubbish.
There was very little mexican food and what there was of it was bland and tasteless.
The only internet cafe was some pokey dive downtown.
They got dirty looks for sunbathing topless off many of their fellow guests but then in the night these guests would take part in party games involving stripping naked, blowjobs and simulating sex. Which she found both distasteful and hypocritical of them.
Sounded dreadful but i was never sure whether she was making it sound worse than it seemed because she didn't want to rub my nose in the fact that she didn't take me.
Its as good / bad as you want it to be.
Its got all the worse aspects of the UK's C18-30, but add to the mix some US College Jocks and their Pneumatic GF who cant drink legally back home, so get utterly leathered at every opportunity :eek:
The other side is that a short Sheduled Bus ride - a couiple of hours max - and you are on unspoiled caribbean Yucatan coastline & local people , with more bean based authentic Mex food than you can shake a stick at :D
you make make your own two centre holiday
phildwyer
05-07-2007, 12:57
Miami.
OMG! We'd love to go to Vegas, along with New York (shops and SATC) and Florida (for the proppa Disneyland innit) but that's in the fantasy realms sadly...:(
I'd like to send you both to Tokyo - I think you'd explode :D
OMG! We'd love to go to Vegas, along with New York (shops and SATC) and Florida (for the proppa Disneyland innit) but that's in the fantasy realms sadly...:(
Vegas at Xmas worked out cheaper than last years Ibiza trip for me.
phildwyer
05-07-2007, 13:28
Vegas at Xmas worked out cheaper than last years Ibiza trip for me.
As long as you don't gamble.
As long as you don't gamble.
As long as you don't lose you mean ;)
OMG! We'd love to go to Vegas, along with New York (shops and SATC) and Florida (for the proppa Disneyland innit) but that's in the fantasy realms sadly...:(
With the strength of the pound atm its the cheapest its ever going to be to see the states right now.
I'm in two minds about going myself soon.
hammerntongues
05-07-2007, 13:36
somewhere in the south of Italy? Sorrento or something? not clubby but gorgeous..
I`d second that , a beach holiday but within a strike of Capri , Pompei/Vesuvius and even Rome if you get fed up with laying on the beach , foods good , scenery even better , its also very do-able on a cheapo package deal.
I'd like to send you both to Tokyo - I think you'd explode :D
Sweet baby jebus! I forgot about tokyo! We'd be in Sanrio heaven, not to mention all the other cool consumer action and stuff like harajuku girls...*swoon*
Stanley Edwards
05-07-2007, 14:34
Torremolinos is so naff it's almost cool. Everything you ask for is there or, a very short drive away.
http://www.thelostphotographer.com/website/gracias/LivingColour/large/23.htm
Cheap flights to Malaga (about 2 hours). Short coach ride from Malaga to Torremolinos or, very cheap car hire (I would recommend avoiding driving mind). I actually quite like the place in September. Sunbathing without the scorch and the crowds.
It is so naff these days that even the naff Brits don't bother with the place anymore. A BIG bonus.
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