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squatting help needed

Discussion in 'benefits and housing' started by zaman, Dec 24, 2009.

  1. AKA pseudonym

    AKA pseudonym Well-Known Member

    :facepalm:

    I think you will find quite a few people with plenty of experiences of homelessness and the squatting movement around these forums... ffs im based in Ireland and know more about the squatting scene in the UK than you apparently do...

    This thread is getting ridiculous now... you have been given the best connections available... theres plenty more about if you get of your arse and look about...

    And i dont think promoting your intentions to engage in 'criminal activity' on a public forum is a very good idea... why dont you just ring the old bill when you intend to pick a lock, they will prob give you some accomodation...
     
  2. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    i BET their's someone reading this thread from a laptop ion a squat and they have an empty room,and they're too lazy to offer it to me!
     
  3. tarannau

    tarannau Mongolian eyed

    You're almost right, but I'd wager it's more that they're thinking 'why the hell would we want this lazy socially-stunted simpleton living with us?'
     
  4. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    no, i thought squatters were peace loving hippies, however expereince with squatters has thought me a LOT of them are just normal ppl too tight to pay the rent. Hence my supposition that there must be squats with empty rooms actually reading this thread who cant be bothered to help a 'brother' in need out.
    Heres my number in case anyone can help me out: <snip - you are asking for trouble - mango5>
     
  5. boskysquelch

    boskysquelch Banned Banned

    fuck off fuck off fuck off
     
  6. tarannau

    tarannau Mongolian eyed

    Wow squatters are normal people? How perceptive of you.

    :facepalm:
     
  7. RaverDrew

    RaverDrew self-banned for a bit R.I.P.

    :facepalm:
     
  8. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    fuck you all back.
     
  9. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    ok, any non-squatters with an empty room: i can do the cleaning if you let me stay? Or for females I can have sex with you as payment. I'm not sexually experienced at all, due to severe depression, but i can learn on the job, so to speak.
     
  10. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    I prefer clever women, like women with degrees in genetic engineering, any of those type of women with a spare room who can let me stay
    please message me,
     
  11. dwenfish

    dwenfish Banned Banned

  12. zaman

    zaman Banned Banned

    very very very long shot, but sophie ellis bextor if you're sluming it by reading urban 75, please can i have your storage room?
     
  13. tarannau

    tarannau Mongolian eyed

    Why don't we stick a little cardboard box outside your mammy's place and you can stay there?

    This really is the best you've got. Well done.
     
  14. mango5

    mango5 pillow of the community

    byeee
     
  15. stethoscope

    stethoscope P.M. Dawn makes cause for rewind

    :facepalm:
     
  16. claphamboy

    claphamboy The wheels on the bus go round and round....

    What. The. Fuck. :facepalm:

    ETA - Oh, you've been banned - farewell you fuckwit.
     
  17. Wolveryeti

    Wolveryeti vole-primping badman

    yon thread delivereth :cool:
     
  18. tarannau

    tarannau Mongolian eyed

    No thanks to you and your wonderfully original 'hippy' japes...

    Zaman was a knob, but he wasn't the only one to come across like an arse on this thread.
     
  19. Compact Jam

    Compact Jam I heard that!!

    the best way to squat is to stand with your feet together and then slowly sit down on your heels so your torso is curled up into the foetal position taking great care to to fall over. Once the weight of your body has come to settle on your heels through your backside you will be in the squatting position.

    However!!!! Do not even attempt this unless you fully trained to get up again or have an assistant to help you back up or you could be left in this position until someone else arrives.
     
  20. tarannau

    tarannau Mongolian eyed


    Er, hello. You're repeating (old) jokes that have already been told by Urban's most supperannuated duffer award winner of 2008* on the first page of this very thread. Only in more verbose and overblown fashion. That's a new witless low and utter fail, surely?

    *I may have made that award up
     
  21. Nixon

    Nixon peanut butter n.w.o.

    I'd like to see ya try and squat something next to the Odeon in Leicester Sq.Do it.You know you want to :)
     
  22. Riklet

    Riklet procrastinación

    Life in a squat: doing lots of ket and emerging from the hole to people like zaman. O JOY...
     
  23. Herbsman.

    Herbsman. Hill climbing is ace

    I really can't believe that no-one has cottoned on to Firky yet!
     
  24. Herbsman.

    Herbsman. Hill climbing is ace

    Come on ffs it's blatantly Firky, and no-one else has mentioned his name on this thread!!!
     
  25. Wolveryeti

    Wolveryeti vole-primping badman

    The method does not matter as long as the po-faced wankers get wound up, providing lols :)
     
  26. i'mnotsofast

    i'mnotsofast Well-Known Member

  27. el-ahrairah

    el-ahrairah where's your ladders?

    I've just read this thread.

    A jolly good firky wind up. Well done that lad. Bring out the cunts, wind up the decent people, go insane or offensive, get banned.
     
  28. wemakeyousoundb

    wemakeyousoundb and calm again

    Interesting thread for sure
     

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